How much housework should be expected from a stay at home mom.?

Question

My wife takes wonderful care of our 18month old son. How much housework if any is it reasonable to expect from her during the day while I'm at work.

Answer 1

I'm a stay at home mother of a 2yr. old boy. I recently went back to work two nights a week and Saturdays for a total of 13hrs. a week, but I am home every day of the week with my child.

I do the majority of the housework. I do all the cleaning, the laundry, grocery shopping, writing the bills out and mailing them, I pack lunches for my oldest son and my husband every morning, I run the oldest to school and pick him up every day, I take care of our toddler and get him down for a nap every day, I make dinner when everyone comes home, I help with homework, I give the youngest one his bath and get him to bed, and I get the oldest to bed. Did I miss anything? Oh, I take kids the their doctor's appointments and get up with them in the middle of the night when they are sick.

When my husband gets home at night, we share what's left of the responsibilities. He gets our toddler ready for the bath and I bathe him and get him to bed, while Daddy cleas up the toys. He also cleans up the dishes after I've made dinner. And he does take care of our toddler on Saturdays when he's off and I work. But I think its only fair that I do most of the chores around the house since he is at work all week, and since he is in the military, they also require one weekend a month too. He mows the lawn, and does the repairs around the house, and kills the icky bugs for me! LOL

Now if I worked full-time, it would be more of a 50/50 deal. But my kids and my house are my full-time job! I went back to work part-time so I could get some time off!!!

Answer 2

I'll be curious to read the answer to this as well. I have a home office and earn enough to where my wife doesn't have to work. As a result she stays at home to be a mom to our twin 10 month old twin baby girls. Having a home office means having extra back up when she needs it, but also makes it hard to focus when I hear the TV and the babies on the other side of the house! So I too wonder sometimes what a reasonable expectation is for housework. Can tell you I work hard to provide for my family, so I admit when I don't have any clean underwear or when dry cleaning is still in the trunk of her car that it kind of pisses me off! But all in all I have very few complaints. Except my home office! LOL!

Answer 3

Well first things first--you shouldn't EXPECT anything. Then...my husband works and I stay home and care for our 6 month old baby. I get up in the morning at 445 am and get my husbands coffee, I get him off to work, our oldest son off to school, I feed the baby. My daily routine consists of laundry, dishes, making the beds, picking up clutter (that is a pet peeve of mine) and making sure there is a hot meal every day when he gets home. Every other day I sweep/vacuum. On Saturdays I do the shopping, mop, dust and clean the bathrooms. He takes out the trash whenever needed, he does everything with the car (gas, tires, washing, cleaning out etc.) . He also takes care of the baby when he gets home, because he is a good daddy like that!!! He would do whatever I asked of him too, I just don't because he works hard all day. He is more than willing to help. Is that good enough??

Answer 4

If she's a stay-at-home Mom then unless she has to be out taking the child to appointments or activities, there's no reason she shouldn't be able to do pretty much all that needs to be done...a house doesn't have to be cleaned daily. Dusting, vacuumming, and bathrooms are every-few-days to once-a-week chores (depending on how dirty the house gets) and beyond that keeping the place tidy and the kitchen clean shouldn't require that much time each day.

My mother raised 3 kids as a stay-at-home Mom and did all the housework until we each became of age to help out with some chores before or after school.

Answer 5

I have been a stay at home mom since Nov of 2005. We have a terminally ill daughter that is on a vent 24/7 and a 9 month old son I take care of them both no help. Both my children need my attention and with my daughters disease process she needs just as much attention as my 9 month old son does. However I cook, clean, do laundry, play with the kids, keep the kids clean, feed the kids and animals {except the horses to hard for me to take both kids to do that excpet on warm days}. I told my husband that I take care of everything inside the home, you take care of it outside the home that means he works {owns his own company} and takes care of the yard. However when it comes to yard work aside from mowing I'll help out. Its a great time to get both our kids outside and spend quality time together as a family. My house is cleaner then anyones home I can think of including those that do not have children because any amount of dust can cause my child to get sicker but we wont get into that. Her job is to take care of the house cook-clean-kids-laundry yours is to work outside the home that simple.

When my husband comes home at night his dinner is cooked and ready to go on the table. Ofcourse he'll help me out with the kids{usually keeping them busy} he never once even complains about that and he'll do the dishs and if I am not watching a load or two of laundry {though he over loads the machine} and he even vaccuumed once! And I'll admit this by the time I have my daughters night breathing treatments done and medications given and her in bed and then my 9 month old in bed I barely have enough energy to go back through the house and pick up his toys, but I do it and the very second my head hits the pillow I am out I am totally exhausted and I dont think he understands that but he always tells ppl I do more in a day then he does in a week and he could never do my job.

Answer 6

I am a stay at home mom and I do all the house cleaning laundry cooking everything my daughter is 8 months and somedays she is really cranky (teething) and there will be some days where I can't get it all done. So I tell my husband he should be happy I get anything done in a day because our daughter is my main priority. I also tell him if I didn't get it done today ill do it tomorrow. A day in the life of a house wife..... Does she EVER get a day off??? NO I don't think so.

Answer 7

i'd say basic stuff like vacuuming, laundry, washed dishes. but taking care of an 18 month old is a full-time job as well (ie. nannies). especially is he's really active, she may be exhausted. so i'd cut her some slack if the house isn't spotless. i mean, as long as the necessaries (laundry, dishes, floors) are taken care of, i wouldn't complain too much. i'm sure if u were home instead of her, u'd be amazed at how much work it is to take care of a baby & a house. remember, she's not the maid. she's your wife. i'm sure she'd appreciate it if you helped her a little instead of criticized her.

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i agree with gozaine. ur wife actually has 2 jobs. not one. and she can't go home & leave either one. if you can afford it, maybe you can have someone come in once a month and take care of the stuff she doesn't. believe me, you will have a much happier marriage! :-)

Answer 8

About the same amount as you do. Have you every tried looking after an 18 month old child? I don't know what you do but I can be fairly sure that her job is both physically and mentally harder than yours, carries more responsibility as she is totally responsible for the life of another human being who is incapable of taking care of themselves, and yet can run, and she probably does longer hours than you as being a mother doesn't stop, even if you aren't actually with the child.

If you aren't satified with the state of the house then get on and sort it out. I'm sure your wife won't mind.

Answer 9

Good that she takes wonderful care of your son but she should be able to keep the house neat and tidy,and get laundry done etc.She shouldn't have to spend every waking moment entertaining the child and not do anything else.She can make a "game" of her chores and involve him in "helping her."
On weekends you should be able to help with the heavy work etc. and also give her a break from the child.
It worked for me and I raised three.

Answer 10

when your at work it should be the work she is doing. Theres a reason they also call stay at home moms homemakers. And yes I have been working hard as a stay at home mom for 17 years now. But try giving her a hand when your around,like doing a load of dishes or laundry, maybe making a nice breakfast for the three of you. Trust me we find it as romantic as getting flowers.