Can I ask all you dating girls and guys a question?

Question

I join the dating world recently because i thought I was ready but after 4 dates I'm beginning to think that maybe I'm not.
The dates all went the exact same way, in the beginning the guys seem nice and friendly but as the date is ending their true intentions come up. they are after one thing and as soon as they realize they wont get it they turn really rude really fast. I dress formally and the talks are always innocent so i don't know where they getting the signals.
My questions are:
Girls: If guys are all like this how can you go on dates without worrying about their true intension's?
Guys: Is it possible to go on a date with someone without he thinking "here's a chance to score"?

Answer 1

don't try so hard and your true love will come =]

its true. after my ex broke up with me, i told myself i was done with guys and i jsut went out with my girl friends to have a good time, and what do ya know...my man came to me. =]

Answer 2

Well, wait just a minute! You need to understand one thing. A guy will only ask a girl for a date if he is physically attracted to her. That is just a cold, hard truth. I mean really, why spend time with (or money on) someone who is repulsive. Men are physical creatures by nature, and you need to understand that. If we are attracted to you, we probably want you. No apologizes from this representative of our gender!

Having said that, there is no excuse for treating a girl/woman as anything less than a lady - especially on a first date. If you are not being treated like a lady then you have a justifiable complaint.

What is not mentioned in your prompt is what "really rude" really means. With only 4 dates under your belt, you are obviously young, so rude may be something as casual as a hug and a kiss, and with the closeness of the hug, maybe you "felt something."

I remember my ex-wife telling me about conversations she had with my daughter and her experience with boys at a school dance. My daughter was shocked and kind of wigged-out. I remember laughing my a** off at the story. Perhaps your are going through this life experience and you are wigging-out.

Still, to answer your questions... you should not have to worry about "true intentions." You now know what they are. But also, you should be able to expect that your dates can/will control themselves.

Dating is a human courtship dance. Are you ready for that?

Answer 3

News flash: all guys are like that; they can't help it. It doesn't mean they don't like you, they just also really like sex. It is not possible that a guy won't even have scoring somewhere in the back of his mind, even if he is gentleman enough to not try it. But I'd say, if a guy is acting rude about you not wanting to give it up on the first couple dates, your relationship is going nowhere fast. He is only physically and not emotionally attracted to you. Time to jump back into the sea and find a new guy; you can do better.

If you find a guy who seems genuinely interested in you, and is perfectly ok keeping it in his pants the first few dates, then he has potential.

Answer 4

It's possible to date without thinking you have a chance to score. You have to realize that some guys are going to think they have a chance and will try it. If that's not what you want, then the date served it's purpose...to find out if he was someone you would want to see again. You just have to keep trying. Each date you have will allow you to find out more about the guy and figure out what you are looking for.

Answer 5

From a guy: It's nice to "hope" :) that you'll get laid the first night that you out with a girl but a lot of times its not like that.... not for me at least... I am sorry you have been able to find only those jerks that have not been nice to you once they find out they are not gone get what they were looking for, not at least the first time.. If this has happen more than once to you think about knowing the other guy a little bit better maybe on the phone before you go out with him. this was you save a lot energy to your self and don't have to face those morons begging for some p... :). Good luck

Answer 6

I've been "dating" for over two years now and I have learned one very important thing. Establish the expectations of that date BEFORE you get dressed up and go out to meet him. Let him know that you don't engage in sexual intimacy with strangers which is exactly what that first date is. There's no time limit on when it may or may not happen, but truly, you will save yourself time and heartache by bringing it up before the date and get his response. To ensure he is being honest, take your own car or take a cab to meet him in a public place and say your goodnights there, not at your front door. Hope that helps.

Answer 7

i'm a woman and that i've got asked a men out a pair of cases. It become continuously nice and that i see no longer something incorrect with it. in the older days it become continuously men doing the asking yet now days women persons are extra self sustaining and play a similar roles as men do. So no i do no longer think of that's to any extent further strange than a guy asking a woman out.

Answer 8

Well I will tell you I have the same trouble so I e-mail and ask alot of questions..ones that I need the answwers to....before I meet them....it usually weeds out the players..some get through but alot fall by the wayside cause they do not want to take the time to answer the questions to really see if we are compatable or not so thoes are the ones I do not want.....and you do not have to be in any hurry for when GOD wants you to be with a man ..you will be no matter what or when....

Answer 9

I can only speak for me, I am a gentleman and I do not go out to "score", I go out to hopefully meet a possible mate. I do not even kiss her unless she make the move, I find it disrespectful to do other wise. I am sorry you have met such scum out there and not all guys are like that, honest. Maybe it's the age of the guys? I'm 34 and I know when I was in my twenties scoring was all I thought about.

Answer 10

Hey there!

I was browsing the dating questions on Yahoo Answers and wanted to spend the time to answer yours.

I'm a dating consultant who specializes in online dating. Unfortunately a lot of the dating market is filled with people trying to use the dating industry as a never-ending supply of "short-term relationships". Quantity over quality daters as we sometimes refer to them... and that's a kind way of putting it.

My best solution is to actually utilize the online dating tools at your disposal to search for someone that has a real relationship on their mind and not just the after-date sex.

I recommend the below site simply because of a lot of good feedback from clients of mine on the quality of the site, as well as the end results that they found! =)

Head to the site and allow yourself to see the forest through the sleaze... Utilize their free trial period to truly get a feel for the quality of men in your local dating market.

When you find a man that is concerned about find out about you and you having a good time on the first date, instead of demanding a prize for just "showing up", then you can thank me for the referral later on...

Answer 11

First you need to look at where exactly are you meeting these guys? Maybe if you tell them upfront before the date that you are looking for something more than just a fling or a one night stand then there will be not misleads.