When someone keeps coming back?

Question

saying things have changed and they believe things could work. How do you get over them? I really don't know if I can take him seriously.

Answer 1

Learn from past experiences with him. Has he come crawling back to you before with promises that he didn't keep? If so, then chances are he isn't going to keep any of them this time either. Try thinking with your head and not your heart. If you feel you are at risk of having your heart broken yet again, then stand firm and kick this guy to the curb. You deserve someone that will treat you with love and respect. You will never respect yourself if you don't do what you know is best. I hope you believe that there really is someone special out there who is just waiting to meet you, but that can't happen if you keep holding onto someone who isn't worthy of your love.

Answer 2

Do you want to get over them? Do you want to give them another chance? Do you want to take him seriously? Or move on? Only you can make that call. Don't try it, unless YOU really want it, too.
Here is the question: Can YOU handle it if he leaves again. Hurts you again, hasn't changed?
If there has been physical abuse, or substance abuse, I wouldn't chance it myself.
When confronted with that decision, I decided I could handle whatever he decided to do, and so I gave him another chance. I told him he had to PROVE to me that he was a changed person. That he respected, and understood that if he messed with me, he as OUT, and that I would break up with HIM and there would be no third chance.
I said ":I don't know what you can do to prove to me that you mean it, but you can try." Then I was hard to convince for about 2 months. He was transparent and honest and right there the whole time.
If you don't want to give him another chance, tell him to leave you alone, and then change your number. Move if you must. Do not respond to him NO matter what.
My decision to let him try again worked out great. We are engaged, and in love, happier than either of us has ever been. He knows if he messes with my emotions again, he is a goner.
Both people have to be dedicated to having a good relationship. If you don't have that, you have nothing, but pain.
Good luck.

Answer 3

You have to make the decision that you're done no matter if things change or not. The thing that holds you back is the thought in the back of your mind that says I don't want to give up if there's a chance it will be better. After making that decision, it's all downhill from there. You will grieve for the loss of your relationship, but something tells me you have been going back and forth for a long time and once done this will be a bit of a relief. Don't stay with someone for their potential, only for what they are. Good luck.

Answer 4

Heres my guess: He has probably tried it with other women when you were not around and has the same problem with them. So he comes back to you. He is riding an emotional rollercoaster and taking you for the ride. It is a rebound thing he cant make it work with anyone else and if you let yourself be a pushover he is going to use that to his advantage. Move on with your life believe me there is someone out there for you who will be true to you.

Answer 5

if you are questioning if you can take them seriously, you probably can't.

i had an ex i gave a second chance to more than once... everytime against my better judgement... everytime she convinced me she had changed.... everytime in ended in a similar bad way.

people can change... but that change is not always permenant.... and once back in an old relationship, there is a strong tendancy for old habits to slowly return. if he really is changed, he is most likely to stay changed with anyone but you.

Answer 6

Okay.. I have been here before.. and matter of fact I let him walk because I didn't trust him when I should have. If he is telling you this .. you need to make it clear to him that he needs to prove to you first and you want things to go slow to see where they go. Don't jump back in head first, walk slowly. Then you will be able to see how he has changed if he really has. Good Luck!

Answer 7

Dont. He has a problem and cant seem to be happy moving on or taking that you have a life without him. Trust me, Ive trying to move on from my ex-boyfriend for three years now and he doesnt seem to understand... Its over. Best way is to ignore him and dont answer or acknowledge anything that he sends nor says.

Answer 8

Tell him if he won't go away permanently you'll have to involve the law. If it doesn't work, follow through and get a restraining order and actually enforce it with police or sherriff or whoever does that in your state.

Answer 9

Say that you have changed too and you no longer have romantic feelings for him...then get rid. He sounds like an idiot.

Answer 10

I believe in second chances...not third, forth, fifth, or twentieth chances, though...

If they really changed, tell them to PROVE it! If they REALLY changed, that person should be willing to work like hell to earn your trust, love and respect back.