when me and my ex got a divorce i kept his last name becuz all my business and lease and everything about me is under this name. well hes about to get married again and his new future wife doenst want us to have the same name. legally i found out i dont have to change it. well if i do change it i will have to go and change every piece of document with that name on it cuz its all connected. that would be alot of and i mean alot of work and time. just to make his new wife happy. cuz i dont think she will marry him if he doesnt get me to do this. well my daughter by my ex wants us to keep the same name. i dont care about none of this at all. but it will take me through a lot of paper work and i mean a hell of a lot. everything about me. what would you do in a situation like this. me personally it shouldnt matter, if they want to get married well go ahaead but why is she bothering me. they have the divorce papers cuz me and him are no longer married.
2007-03-14 02:23:39 · 28 answers · asked by eaglestraces123 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I understand where you are coming from. I was married for 16 years and had two children and didn't change my name for the same reasons as you. Two years later I married. He was a loser we divorced after a year. I took back my children's last name. Six years later I married my husband now and have his last name. It is a big headache changing your name. People did not know who I was. Until I would tell them what my name use to be. My advice is don't change it. Your ex was married to you and his new soon to be wife knows this. So she is the one with the problem and not you. You do what is best for you.
2007-03-14 02:36:55 · answer #1 · answered by Janst 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Check your divorce papers to make sure that it wasn't ordered that you return to your maiden name, you are then violating a court order, and she could cause problems for you. Second see if hyphenating your maiden and married name would be an option. You could then keep your business materials with the same ex married last name, and use your maiden name for other purposes. The other thing to think about and perhaps ask the new wife to be,is why is it so important? She is acting like it is a "threat" to her. She may interpret the not changing the name as you not having let go of him. It might be wise to talk to both of them explain the situation and see if you can come to an agreement.
2007-03-14 02:30:42 · answer #2 · answered by Austins Mom 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You know what, both you ex and his wife to be have alot of growing up to do. Question is , Is he the only one in the entire world that has that name? and since he is not will the wife go around telling everyone to drop the name? Again she should know you were once there and done that and needs to accept that she will always be second after you and finally i don't think your ex is totally over you cause if he was he would not be bothering you over petty issues like a name. Also let his wife to be not use this issue of you keeping the name the reason as to why she doesn't want to marry the dude, tell her if she doesn't like him she can walk without dragging your name into their stupid domestics.
2007-03-14 02:46:13 · answer #3 · answered by jenny 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think that his future wife has her panites in a bunch about nothing. I wouldn't change my name if I were you. I know how much paperwork my wife had to go through to change her name when we got married. And that was just for identification. You have a business and other stuff. I would let you ex handle it. If she doesn't marry him because of a name then that is her problem not yours. You and your ex are legally divorced so that is all that matters. Who cares if you have the same last name?
2007-03-14 02:28:50 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Tell her to grow up! She knew the situation when she got involved with your x. Why should you have to change your name to please her? She sounds like the type that has gotten her way way too long, don't you give in to her to. Besides your child has that last name and when children are involved sometime it is better to keep your married name. I think she needs to deal with it and grow up. She can't erase you, your x and you have had a relationship and will continue to do so until you die because you have a child together. There will be many times in her future that you and him will have to be together for your child. That's life and you really need to tell this controlling ninny that!
2007-03-14 02:41:29 · answer #5 · answered by Laura S 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I wouldn't worry about changing your name. That is her problem that she doesn't want you to have the same name. I would want to keep my daughter happy besides he gave you that name when he married you. If she is upset about having the same name sounds like she has alot of growing up to do. Being married is for grown ups.
2007-03-14 02:32:29 · answer #6 · answered by Mel 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Keep your last name as it is...the new woman is just being petty. i am divorced myself with two kids and i kept his name. i would have been hell to switch everything around. When i was 14 my mom remarried and i hated that she had a different last name. tell the new wife she will have to learn to deal with it or don't marry him. it's not your problem anymore to make him happy.
2007-03-14 02:35:19 · answer #7 · answered by KIM L 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's your ex's problem, he can't make you change your name and you shouldn't feel any obligation too, because it's YOUR name. There is a really simple word in the english language that you can say to him to put this to rest it's "NO". He hasn't got any right to ask you to do this, nor does she. You might want to look into harrasment laws in your area, maybe even get a lawyer and sue for same.
2007-03-14 02:31:08 · answer #8 · answered by al b 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
That's ridiculous! How old is she--15???? If I were you I wouldn't even give it a second thought. Keep whichever name you want. I kept my ex-husband's name too because you're right--it's a pain to get it all changed back!! Whether or not she will marry him if you don't change your name is their problem, not yours! But good luck, she sounds like a real winner.
2007-03-14 02:27:27 · answer #9 · answered by spelling nazi 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You have a daughter by this guy. Keep his name!!! Don't change it to make his new wife happy.
She has to learn that there are worse things in life than having the same last name as the ex-wife.
Why doesn't she keep her maiden name if it is that important to her????
Good Luck!
2007-03-14 02:28:12 · answer #10 · answered by Jo 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋