Hello, I am a virgin. (not really by choice) haha. And one of the few I know of these days, however i find people constantly telling me after losing theres that "its not that big of a deal". So, Id like some opinions on why people feel they need to say this to me, and if its not a big deal then why does EVERYONE talk about sex constantly.
2007-03-13 19:23:43 · 7 answers · asked by wilma 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Sex in and of itself is not a big deal. It is a natural occurrence among all the creatures of this planet in some form or another. There is nothing magical or mythical about sex. It feels good. Sex for the sake of sex is over rated.
HOWEVER
Sex among humans has an emotional side that the majority of the rest of the world's creatures lack. And THAT is what makes sex a big deal. Sex with someone you love and are committed to is so wonderful and magical, because of the emotional ties between the two of you. Truly I have felt (on occasion) as if I was having an out of body experience when my husband and I make love. Making love is under rated.
This is why people talk about it so much. Because when it is sex, it isn't a big deal. But when it is making love, it is a huge deal. A piece of your very being/soul/essence is forever tied to that person. That is why some people bed hop...they keep hoping to turn sex into making love and it doesn't work that way. (personal exp. and learned from the school of hard knocks)
I'm not going to tell you to remain a virgin until your married, but I will advise you to chose your lovers carefully. Once it is done it can not be undone. When you have sex for the first time, let it be for love. Let it be making love and not just sex.
How will you know it is love you feel and not lust? Adults still struggle with this question. But, in general, the love you feel as a teen is NOTHING like the love you feel as a mature adult.
2007-03-13 19:50:58 · answer #1 · answered by Poppet 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think that what they are telling you is that being a virgin isn't that big of a deal.
And the reason they say it is .. it isn't. It just means you haven't had sex. It doesn't make you virtuous or pure. Just inexperienced.
Now, that doesn't mean that you should take sex lightly. Getting pregnant or diseased or being violated are real issues that you need to protect yourself from.
Sex for the first time isn't that great (nor does it last long for a guy) but it improves. Don't do it just to get it over with, but you shouldn't be afraid of losing your virginity. We don't live in the middle ages any longer.
2007-03-14 14:25:57 · answer #2 · answered by Martin Pedersen 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
"its not a big deal" means are u pertaining to virginity or sex? if its virginity, in todays world where sex is being done by anyone(at least to some liberals) virginity means it doesnt bother too much anymore whether it's ur 1st time or not. (of cors! not when u barely had ur last diaper). Its no big deal if you marry one who is not virgin (w/ the exceptions of some cultures/ beliefs who consider virginity as sacred- with all due respect) bcoz in the end what mattered most is the relationship itself. (tho its a plus factor but not necessarily- to my point of view) While if you are pertaining to sex (as no big deal),to perverts its no big deal but if you are in a good relationship.. sex is not just sex.its intimacy that counts a lot. its an expression of love! its also a bonding moment for two consenting adults who love each other. Believe me, there's nothing more better sex than doing it with someone you love & who is in love with you as well.
2007-03-14 02:39:55 · answer #3 · answered by jables 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is a big deal it is going to be somthing you remember for the rest of your life, you will remember everything about it, where you were, what you were wearing, how the room or he smelt.. It is something special we give to the ones we love so if we give to whoever then it is not special anymore.. And honestly sex is over rated yes it is great but we need more people like you that wait then we would not have 15 year old moms, and welfare as bad
2007-03-14 02:29:25 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
it' is and it isn't! it's a wonderful experience to live but not a biiiig deal. it may be as wonderful as to be able to do bicycle or some other stuffs like that. Euphoric... but after that, normal life continues it's boring journey, so i'll suggest to try waiting for as looooong as it's possible to wait. cause addiction is the reason why so many people talk bout sex all day long!!!
2007-03-14 02:39:52 · answer #5 · answered by T-spooon 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't see the big deal. As long as you are responcible about it. Like sex is totally better without condoms but if you are not able to deal with what could happen if you don't use protection than you better use protection. I consider sex a good soul cleanser.
2007-03-14 02:35:02 · answer #6 · answered by MiKe 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
im a virgin but non of my friends are unvirgins so yur not alone but i still dont know yur question
2007-03-14 14:27:49 · answer #7 · answered by sissie12 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋