please help, no one is answering my question, its important!?

Question

ive been talking to a great guy online, he wants to fly from texas to colorado to meet me. he is 34 and im 23. ive fallen in love with him. how long do you think we should talk before he visits. also one of my friends is going to come with me to the airport to pick him up. i have done a background check on him. and no i dont think he is to old for me, i only date older guys

Answer 1

i dont think tht there is any prob with him visiting just so long as he finds his own place to stay and a friend always knows where you guys are when ur together.

also, becareful. its not love yet. You may feel "in love" and all the happy feelings that goes with that, but u cant possibly truly LOVE each other yet.

have fun tho.
and dont worry about the age thing. ur always as mature as u act and think, and as young as you feel.

Answer 2

There is no set standard on how long you should wait before meeting a person offline, it depends more on their personality. I've never had a problem meeting people off the internet but I must also say, I'm a great judge of character.

If he's pushy, you may want to wait awhile. Also, I'm very concerned about the idea that you think you are in love with him, that's the biggest red flag of all. I certainly hope you haven't told him this.

Make sure someone (friend or family member) knows he's coming to town. Also, give them his first AND last name, cellphone and/or house number and address if you have it. I know it may seem extreme but you can never be too careful.


Oh, and ignore the idiots who think you have to be desperate to meet someone offline. These are usually people who don't have lives and careers and have time to frequent bars or where ever else you would go these days to meet other singles.

I wish you the best.

Answer 3

If you have fallen in love with him already, then why be hesitant? However, if you are prone to fall for just any guy, and maybe you get your hopes up quickly or fall in love too quickly, then maybe you might be cautious. To bring a friend along is a great idea. I'd even have the friend around during the visit just in case it falls through, if it doesn't, I'm sure you can dismiss the friend. I know a lot of people who've met people online, fallen in love, gotten married, and are still married. They tend to feel a bit embarrassed about having met online, but I don't understand why. Everyone seems to be online and if you're motives aren't devious, there is no shame in meeting people there. However, the fact that some people are online for devious reasons maybe gives it that stigma. Good luck!

Answer 4

I don't know about not really knowing the guy before you meet him. It's good that you'll have a friend along. It could work, but the whole thing sounds a little creepy to me, no offense, but why don't people meet someone and become friends face to face instead of deciding "I'm going to date this older person from some far away place that I've never really met". Sorry, it might just be me, but it sounds like a bad idea. I'm sure there are good people in Colorado that you can meet.

Answer 5

Hey, cowgirl, at 23 you should know that you don't 'fall in love' with anyone on-line. C'mon. Love takes time, commitment, and some proof of loyalty. What do you have? Lust. Maybe. Go at this with the knowledge that your hormones, not your heart ,are working here.

This guy hasn't had to do one thing but e-mail you and you are 'in love.' Don't you think that is just a bit too easy for him? He hasn't even taken you out on a date that he planned to see if you two are even remotely compatible in the light of day? Nor, has he seen you in a tough spot or you him. You know nothing about the important stuff here. What you need is counseling to help you understand why you would think what you have is love? And, where you got such a low value on yourself that the crumbs of a relationship look like the whole cookie. Slow Down.

Answer 6

I am going to be upfront with you! You feel you have a connection with this guy on line and maybe you will face-to-face too but be very sensible. Don't just take your friend to the airport make sure that you put your safety first and always be in the company of others, at least for this first visit. If he's a good guy then he'll respect you taking care of yourself. I am married but do have friends who have been down the "on line dating road" and most of them say that the guys they meet are different in the flesh. I wish you lots of luck and hope it works out for you, but please be safe and don't be too disappointed if he's "not all that" after all. Admit to yourself that you are attracted to him, but I'd hold out judgement on the "love thing" until you really get to know each other face to face.

Answer 7

Its whatever you feel that you want to do and how comfortable you are with the situation. But in my personal opinion i think that you should wait longer and get to talk to him more. And i agree with dating the older men out there, but for me not too old. You know what i mean? I know why you date them too. Anyways, i have been tallking to a 24 year old when i am only 20 years old and me and him have been talking for almost over a year now. Or coming close to it and we have been friends up until now. Now we just want to talk to each other more and start to have a relationship. But thats why i am comfortable with him and talking to him and all. SO i think that you should be too.

Answer 8

Talk for one year. When starting a new job it takes about a year before you really get an HONEST feel for the job. Maybe after a year, you could get an HONEST (key word) feel for a STRANGER (another key word), because that is all that a person online is. A stranger. But, all people that you newly meet in life are strangers. My wife was a stranger when I met her 15 years ago. Hope this helps.

Answer 9

Considering you've checked him out and he's coming to you not you going to him I think it's ok, I just wouldn't be alone with him for awhile. As far as a time frame that depends on you. If a friend hooked you up with someone how long would you have to talk before you were ready to meet him. After all even if a friend hooks you up with someone, you can't be sure their safe either

Answer 10

ok we're supposed to be honest here right? well, i dont think its a good idea thay you are meeting a guy that you talk to online. but it was a smart idea to do a background check. how do you fall in love with someone on here? he could type anything. be careful when you do go and take not one but several friends with you in case something goes wrong. good luck. wishing the best.