Okay long story short, im dating this guy, but its a long distance relationship, he lives six hours away from me, his parents are split up and his dad lives a half an hour away from me, so whenever he goes to his dads we see each other, well now insted of just comming up to see his dad, he says because he loves me so much and wants to be with me that he is planning to move in with his dad very soon, and idk if i should let him do it, like it would be awesome, and im so much in love with him, and yes im a teen and alot of people say, teens dont know the meaning of love, its just puppy love, but umm im not friggen retarted I know when i love someone like holy S*** ive never felt this way before, im head over heels in love with him and i no it even my mom agrees with me, sorry off topic but anywayss, of topic, im just scared if something ever went wrong hed blame me, keep in mind i never asked him to it was his choice, and i would love for him if he did, jus idk,, what should i do? help!
2007-03-13 15:08:31 · 14 answers · asked by jahnaa 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I would tell him that although you would love it if he was closer because you could see each other more often, you want to make sure that he does not just do it for you. Is he in school too? Has he looked at where he will be going, and is he confident that he wants to be there? He is going to make his own decision, and if things ever went wrong, he can always move back. He may or may not blame you, because people can be irrational when things don't work out like they hope, but in the long run you know this is on him either way. Be supportive if he does decide to do it, but make sure that he knows that you love him either way, and you are willing to keep things as they are.
And the other poster is way correct, he needs to move because he wants to move, not because of your relationship. That does bring a heck of a lot of the responsibility for his happiness in your lap, and that can be a heavy burden.
As a side note, long distance relationships can be hard, BUT they can work if two people are willing to communicate often when they aren't together and make the most of the time they have when they are. My fiance and I have a long distance relationship. We make sure to see each other every other week, and we talk daily on the phone as well as e-mail and chat online. Anything can work if you are willing to put the effort in and it is worth it. For me...love it worth it.
2007-03-13 15:14:26 · answer #1 · answered by kalea_kane 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Since school will be out in a couple of months, ask him to visit his dad for the summer, that way if something goes wrong, it wouldn't have been a permanent move, & he could go back home. No schools to change, just a summer visit- but if things go ok, then he can decide if he wants to make it permanent. He could get homesick & miss his friends & want to go back home, too. Make absolutely sure it's his idea. If u push him to come & things go sour, then yea, he can blame u, & u don't want that. lol
2007-03-13 15:27:36 · answer #2 · answered by louise b 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First teens can fall in love and know what love is. Second make sure he understands he needs to decide to live with his dad because that is th e right move for him not for the relationship. Tell him there is no pressure on your part and you want him to be happy and share your concerns with him.
2007-03-13 15:12:22 · answer #3 · answered by bbinqueens33 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well, if he moves with his dad, let him move there because he wants to be there,not to be closer with you but if you guys fall out and have issues, it will not be your fault. Also don't be too keen to trust a long distance relationship, you never know what that other person is doing, you just have to trust them and that is a lot of trust.
2007-03-13 15:16:29 · answer #4 · answered by Ice Queen 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There's nothing you can do, if he's coming, he's coming. Granted he's coming because of you but its his decision. I know you don't want to hurt his feelings and you're scared of loosing him if things go wrong and all that. You're also likely to miss out on a whole lot because you're too busy being scared. Moreover, you're probably going to break his heart or he'll break yours so just go for it. don't do anything you don't feel comfortable doing and have a good time. Because at the end of the day S**t Happens !!!
2007-03-13 15:16:00 · answer #5 · answered by jjsingh97 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Try running speel check when writing things like "I am not retarted", when it's suppose to be "retarded" is retarted. On the subject, do it, but practice safe sex! You only live once and it sounds like you have made him wait long enough!
Enjoy!
p.s. Get a room. Do not do it in a car for your first time. Also, maybe a dinner and a movie! ....in your room! lol.
2007-03-13 15:17:15 · answer #6 · answered by ? 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Make sure that he's positive about it. He can't blame you if your relationship goes south because he's the one who wanted to be near you. If he truly loves you he'll know that if something goes wrong that it was his fault, not yours. And if he truly has his heart set on moving closer to you there's nothing you can do to discourage him. All's I can say is good luck.
2007-03-13 15:16:22 · answer #7 · answered by Crazy Dragon 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he volunteered to do this and you didn't ask him to or put any pressure on him to do so, I would say just enjoy it. If something does happen down the road and he wishes he hadn't moved, it's not your fault at all, he was the one who thought of the idea and made the final decision. Good luck!
2007-03-13 15:14:33 · answer #8 · answered by sarai_kristi 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Let him do it. I've learned from other experiences that long distance relationship start to deteriorate and dont work most of the time.
2007-03-13 15:14:01 · answer #9 · answered by el_carliosmx 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if you love him true love from the heart thats all that matters let him move to his dads and give it a trial basis if it works out save money and work on getting a place of your own love is hard to find it is very blind so follow your heart and GOD itll work its way out
2007-03-13 15:19:21 · answer #10 · answered by Arhena D 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋