Can anyone explain why good guys do seem to finish last?

Question

Im a decent guy, yet i have been single for a year and a half. Not like i havent been trying to find a gf...but i have been told that i am actually to nice. If someone could explain that it would be most appreciated. By to nice i mean i pick up the check, open doors... i try to do the classic stuf that most women think is so romantic.

Answer 1

OK- here's the thing with this one...when women are young and dumb and immature, they want the bad guys...the louder more aggressive ones...the popular football jerks who treat them like shi* Then, after they get their hearts broken year after year after maybe a decade or 2, they wake up (some never do but the good ones realize it sooner) and realize a relationship with a nice guy is what they want. Picking up the check and opening doors and being classy and traditional is a DREAM!!! I would absolutely love that!! Now, if you are too nice in terms of "have everything your way, I'm not going to argue with you, you are right, I wanted to have italian but fine, we'll do chinese for the 5th night in a row" yes, u need to start speaking up for yourself, not just in terms of women but in terms of succeeding in LIFE. Have an opinion and never be afraid to voice it, in tactful manners of course- do not become a jerk, just dont be a doormat- have a good balance is basically what I'm getting at. And be patient, finding a good one sometimes takes years upon years, but at least you are not wasting your life and your emotions on someone you cant appreciate you for all the great qualities you possess. Best of luck and happiness! :)

Answer 2

The bottom line, is that nice guys do finish last. I'm in the same boat as you except its been three years. I've had a couple of flings but nothing meaningful and most often I quickly get sucked in to the friends zone way before I can make a move. I hear so many women complaining about how their bf doesn't listen or appreciate them and when I listen and appreciate a girl, I become a good friend. The worst part is the longer it takes for women to understand the difference between what they want and need and they truly want a nice guy they have so much baggage from all their bad relationships that nice guys aren't going to want them either. Either a nice has to play a little dirty now to get a little action or just sit on our hands and wait for the women our age to wake up.

Answer 3

I totally understand where you're coming from man. I'm 30 years old, never been married and have no kids and guess what still single. I, like yourself do all of the things that a gentleman is supposed to do but for some reason I still finish last. Not all women, but a lot of them are still hung up on the bad guys. You know the ones that cheat on their woman, hit their woman, lie to their woman etc. But It's like this those woman that have not figured it out yet are still trying to figure themselves out. I do all I can to use the things that were taught to me by my mother and try yo prove to the women of the world that chivalry is not dead.

All I can tell you is just continue doing what you're doing and don't try to force love to happen because it's something that is supposed to happen naturaly. Sooner or later she'll come to her senses and realize what she's been missing this whole time.

Whatever you do keep representing for us good guys. Good luck

Answer 4

No. Too nice means too easily taken advantage of. Like, showing too much. Men and women like mystery and want what they can not obtain. Do not go too out of your way for someone or give too much because we see that as a weakness and it is a turn off. Be too busy for us sometimes, do not put up with crap, and do not buy too many things for us. Do not put us on a pedestal and pretend that you don't really care sometimes because that will make us want to change your mind. It is not about playing games..it is just how things are. When you ignore someone...they want you more.....

Answer 5

Don't fall for that line of crap. Plenty of women like nice guys, but either you don't really want a decent woman or you're looking in the wrong places. Yes, many women like "bad boys" but how many of these relationships turn out to be long-lived and happy? Not many. Believe me, it's well worth holding out for a quality person.

Answer 6

So, what's the question? it kind of feels you have got here across your vindication. if so, congratulations. If no longer, shop on being the gentleman which you're. There somewhat are women accessible who can relish a guy such as you. purely don't be a pushover.women like men who can take administration of any difficulty.

Answer 7

Most women fall for the bad boy type and soon find out that they won't treat them right.they either marry that person or when they break up they just end up with losers and feel they dont deserve anything better.

Answer 8

Women probably think you must be a loser if you have to try so hard to please them. Plus most girls like a challenge, a guy who is hard to trap, and then they can change him. (which never works, as "bad" guys can't be changed, which is why there is so much divorce and single mothers.)

Answer 9

women like to feel needed and if you are too nice or too close to perfect then they have nothing to work on. They like to feel that you have flaws which makes your need of them essential. Being too nice makes you seem flawless.

Answer 10

that is sweet and nice but most women go after the guy that will hurt them after a while. so in other words bad boys!!!!!!!!