I'm really confused about to give 3 different guys I am interested in second chances to date me.
I dated each of them 4-5 months ago, only 1 time each. Met each via MATCH.
I only had headshots on match so I admit now that they probably thougt I was thinner before meeting me.
At the time I was in the process of losing weight & getting in great shape.
I was wearing size 12 but didnt realise HOW big I still was. When I was done my date with the third guy & he didnt seem interested one of my very honest friends told me he probably wanted a thinner girl.
I finally weighed myself and nearly fainted. Even though I had confidence & felt in good shape i was still top heavy with bigger arms/chest/back, my weight was 169 ! At 5'5 WITH A TINY FRAME. I couldnt believe it.
So I lost the weight with 90 minutes exercise sessions and now weigh a healthy but thin 112-119.
I should add that Ive been thin most of my life. Had very bad accident last year and packe don the weigt from inactivity & depression. And being small with little metabolism.
I wear a size 2 now have so much energy, love the way i look again and am constantly getting hit on all the time.
I guess a lot of men prefer thin women.
Id be a hypocrite to criticize them though.
I myself want a tall, in great shape cute guy. We like what we like and can't really change.
So I recently put up new photos of myself and the 3 guys who were interested in me before now are showing major renewed interest.
Should I GIVE THEM SECOND CHANCES ? They each have a lot going for them and since I myself am super picky I feel tempted to give at least 1 of them another try.
1 of the 3 guys has remained a good online friend and is very interested in my life.
He lives pretty far away and has nothing to gain by being my friend, so now that Im thin and appeal to him I feel like trying with him again.
The other 2 are also still friendly to me, none of them were mean or jerky. 1 of them also tells me im pretty no matter what.
And all were too polite to say they were disappointed by my former size.
Should I try again or start from scratch with all new guys ?
2007-03-13 14:04:09 · 16 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
hey I don't know if you should give the guys a ashot or not... I guess I'm kinda like you... thinking yea I want a hot guy... BUT damn isn't it harsh when someone won't even get to know you based on looks?I recently have gained allot too, because of a traumatic life event I had depression real bad, I am pulling myself back up, but I went out this weekend for the first time in a long time and was shocked that no guys were hitting on me! I guess weight plays a bigger role than I had realized b4 when I was thinner!!! It's so sad, but I will not let this discourage me. Can you email me and let me know you're exact routine? and how long it took 4 u to lose the rest of your weight? I'd appreciate it soooo much!!! Thanks!
2007-03-13 14:11:34 · answer #1 · answered by ? 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like maybe a big part of all this is your own self-conciousness about the weight that you had gained. If they were all nice to you, then maybe distance or something else played a factor. The point is, attraction is only so much, and someone should care about who you are, and click with who you are for it to really work. Do you know how many miserable people marry people they were only attracted too. I have also learned in my personal experience, that getting to know someone and caring for them, can make anyone look attractive. Its what is on the inside that counts.
As far as these 3 guys, if you feel you want to give them a chance, why not go for it, like you said they were never mean. But I guess it really depends on how you felt about them.
2007-03-13 14:30:14 · answer #2 · answered by Kellie 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you already know the answer from what you said about being picky yourself...Who can blame a guy for wanting a thinner girl if that's what they are attracted to. As long as they were nice and weren't like your fat I don't wanna see you again I would go for it!
Oh by the way congrats for your weight loss!! that's great!
2007-03-13 14:10:21 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would not give them the time of day. If they couldnt like you the way you were, I would not waste a second thought on any of them. i would completely start over with new guys! Maybe you will find someone who likes you inside and out. Congrats and good luck.
2007-03-13 14:07:58 · answer #4 · answered by bratzmom 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you can go ahead and give second chances. Good luck and congratulations. A size 12 to a size 2! I think that talks about your personality, your determination and discipline, and not only about your physical apperance and many man know that.
2007-03-13 14:11:54 · answer #5 · answered by M1980 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
nah... you know now that they are shallow guys. you need a guy that would love you no matter how big or small you are.
You can just date them, but i have to warn you that you can come to like this guy more than anything. Things change and your feelings for him can grow. Seeing how they all of the sudden want to go out with you they just like you for how you look like. cmon girl you can do better than that
2007-03-13 14:27:50 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
furst of all i think u shouldnt go online to meet guys but anyway do whatever u want... well now they want u because ure thinner, so i think they just like u because ure thin, so i think u should find someone else
2007-03-13 14:09:59 · answer #7 · answered by anonymous 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Either go w/ the guy you've remained friends w/ online or start over. I would recommend starting over.
2007-03-13 14:08:16 · answer #8 · answered by srgirl6391 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all try not to overanalyze the situation. Second, start over. That's your best bet.
2007-03-13 14:08:48 · answer #9 · answered by Reo 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
New guys. If those others are obviously shallow and superficial by desiring you solely on your looks.
2007-03-13 14:08:17 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋