What do you think about my poem about crushes?

Question

Title: Crushes
Made by: katekitty
"This is a poem about crushes. How I experienced them and what I thought. What do you think?"


Crushes are hard,
Hard to figure out,
You always want to know,
what they are all about.

You sit and think for a moment,
Is this the right guy?
You get confused,
as you see him walk by.

Your heart pounds so fast,
You try to look attractive,
You try to look cool,
You feel very active.

You talk about them with your best friend,
This dreadful confusion, you want it all to end.
You try not to like him,
You just pretend.

Crushes are crushes,
You always think their interest lack,
But you never know,
Until they like you back.

Crushes are confusing,
You never know what to say,
until you experience them,
they come a long way.

-katekitty

Okay,4th person, thanks for you advice, I will actually try it. I want to get better at making poems. But at least it made sense right? :D lol

Answer 1

it could use some fine tuning, however it delivers a very precise message

Answer 2

There is no meter to this poem. The syllables don't fit.

Like if I were to make a poem:

I like singing every day.
I like rolling in the hay.

See how it would read with emphasis on every other syllable?

I-like-SING-ing-EV-ery-DAY.
I-like-ROLL-ing-IN-the-HAY.

It's called meter. It's the "rhythm" of the rhyme. Now if I changed the second line:

I like singing every day.
I like to roll around every now and then in the hay.

Yes, "day" and "hay" rhyme, but there's absolutely no rhythm to this poem.

Try to match the amount of syllables. It will read better. Because if you're throwing meter and rhythm out the window, then it might as well not rhyme either.

Answer 3

Katekitty, THAT WAS VERY NICE. YOU SHOULD CONTINUE TO WRITE POEMS. REMEMBER THEY DON'T ALL HAVE TO RHYME. I REALLY THINK YOU HAVE A GIFT. NOT EVERYONE CAN RIGHT POETRY... KEEP UP THE GOOD WORK.. KATHY

Answer 4

lol u surely have a lot of time to kill.. its a nice one though congratulations..

Answer 5

YAY!! I enjoyed it. Good work...make some more!:)