Kid screw ups?

Question

So many people say that public schooled kids are screwing up a lot (i.e. drugs, sex, violence, etc....) then why don't people want to help these kids get back on the right track.
I see this a lot with adults, all they do is complain about the problem and not do anything to help it.
Do you think this is one of the reasons so many kids are screwing up, they have little or no support from the adults.

Adults focus more on the "good" kids of the world, what about the "screw ups"?


The reason why I'm posting this in the home schooling section is I want some feedback from home schoolers. I'm NOT posting this to try and start a fight (even tho I admit, in the past I have tried to start arguments about home schooling).

Answer 1

yea i think most kids are like this because they dont get support from any adults.

Answer 2

From what I have experienced, that is not true at all. At my high school (which is very mixed socio-economically), and all the others that I've had any contact with, the bottom of the class is catered to much more than the top (with the exception of honors programs). Adults do not focus more on the "good" kids than the "screw ups." Just look at the news. How often do you hear a story about a teenager who is doing good things in the world? It happens, but rarely. I think that our society would be much improved if we did focus a little more on the good in the world. I think that would give the troubled kids, or "screw ups" more of an incentive to do better, and more to model themselves after.

Its true that alot of kids are turning to sex, violence, and drugs...and that many of these kids attend public schools, but I don't think that the problem begins there. I think that it is a problem that needs to be solved the world in general...or at least the country.

Reformation needs to happen. While I don't think that it is true that kids get "little or no support form the adults" I think that there does need to be more of it. Part of the problem is that society needs to come to a point in which the majority of troubled teenagers are willing to accept support from the huge number of adults in their lives who do offer it.

Answer 3

Frankly, I don't think the majority of the kids who are screwing up would be interested in my help. I'd rather do what I can to prevent problems. Be pro-active. Which is part (only a small part) of the reason I homeschool my kids.

If they were kids in my life, then sure, I'd do what I could to help them get back on track. But they're not. It's not my place to go seek out kids I can help. Unless I felt it was my calling as a job or something. I bet you a lot of adults feel the same--what are they to do to make things better? Once kids have taken that road, unless their *parents* (let me emphasize that as much as I can) learn some better techniques to help their kids, there's not much anybody can do unless the kids reach out for help.

Answer 4

The kids actions are a direct result of the parents actions. If the parents are attentive and invoved and open for all kinds of discussion- the kids are MUCH less likely to be screw-ups. Self-absorbed, Lazy, non-caring parents have the screwed up kids.
All of the homeschooled people I know (now that I'm an adult) are all totally messed up. Most of them have to go to counciling to deal with social issues. The ages range from 30 to 7. They are from different parts of the nation and had different lifestyles/opportunities and are all undergoing treatment for their social problems.
I went t public school and turned out fine. It was because of my parents. It's the same for people in private school.

Answer 5

As a former public school teacher and private tutor, I will say that the main reason many students have trouble deals with low self-esteem. Self-esteem is developed at a very early age--and is something that the parents and immediate family and neighborhood greatly influences. It is an extraordinary child who can overcome a parent who says that they are worthless and not going to amount to anything. It is hard for any child to do well in school if the family and neighborhood shows by their actions that education is not valued (this is shown by never having quiet time to study, never taking time to read books to children, etc).

By and large, most home schoolers have good self-esteem because their parents and family show by their actions that they value education AND value the student as well.

Answer 6

Drugs, sex and violence isn't just an issue with the kids in school, it's an issue with young adults as well. It's more a society issue then a school, because it's all over.

Answer 7

Well, it's sad that the adults you have interaction with on a daily basis seem to do nothing but complain and have no desire to help troubled kids.
Compared to your situation, I'm blessed, because I see people reaching out to youth on a regular and consistent basis. Everywhere. My experience has been that it is the bottom and top third that get the attention, while the "average" kids that get ignored the most. But in my community, I don't see adults complaining, I see them doing something. Our public library, for example. It is packed out after school. Why? Parents don't want to pay for childcare, so they tell them to walk to the library and wait for them to pick them up after work. Sometimes there are kids waiting outside after the library closes. I talked to the librarian why there were so many kids in here, and she said, what can she do? If asking her staff to "babysit" to keep these kids off the street, then she would do it. Our Rec. Center does the same thing. Offers tutoring and alllows kids to just hang out until their parents get home. And churches? Our church opens early on Wed. and again on Thursday to give youth a place to hang out. We have tons of things for them to do: pool, video games, air hockey, outdoor volleyball, and a cafe. In addition to that, our community has afterschool programs, mentoring programs, sidewalk Sunday schools (on Saturdays, lol)
And my community is just like many many other communities all across the country.
So, you see, your viewpoint is limited to what you see.
the problems you describe have been around forever. Yes, the problems are increasing, but they've always been around.
I don't think the job of taking care of the "screw ups" belongs to the "adults."
Now, don't get me wrong. I give of my time regularly to work with youth from K-12, and I will continue to do what I can for as long as I can, but I do not view it as my "job" or my "responsibility" I do it because I choose to.
The job belongs to the parents.
Parents need to get involved in their children's lives and make them feel like they matter.
What message does it send to those kids that fill my public library every single day, when their parents don't value them enough to make proper arrangements for them after school? I see some kids walking in the rain, for crying out loud. Or what about the kids that are in to all this emo/suicide stuff, that just shrug and say, "nothing I can do"
It's the job of the parents, not society. We're out there bustin' it, trying to make a difference, but until the parents reinforce the message that these kids do matter, it won't help as much as it could.

Answer 8

Children are far more materialistic than ever! I believe that the support children need from adults are bought with a leapster. Kids have to do things more on their own (ie, day care all day or latch key kids etc.) as well.

Answer 9

I see both sides.. I really do..But you got realize something your( meaning adults) actions speak louder than words.. for example in my home town there gal that nearly 50 going out with 22 year old.. she been divorced 4 times that i know of. You cant tell me them kids are screwed up because i bet they are..

Answer 10

My son is home schooled.This is our first year.I don't blame the problems of children today,on the public school system.The " screw ups" as you put it ,in my opinion , are seeking attention. Why blame the schools for poor parenting skills? Too many children today have no responsibilities.There are no consequences for their actions.Schools are now limited to what they are allowed to do because of the "My child is an angel syndrome".Parents need to step up to help their children and quit blaming the schools .I chose to home school this year because of my son's severe health problems.I know the foundation in which I have raised my child is my responsibility and I have no one to blame, but myself, if I screwed up.More parents need to realize this.

Answer 11

you ought to call DSS (CPS). they gained't only seem with a van and cart the youngsters off to stay with strangers. they're going to inspect, and verify out to enable the mothers and dads be certain the placement (get appropriate clothing, end the partying, etc.) in the past they take any intense measures, except the youngsters are in instantaneous risk. i think of this is the final element you're able to do for those childrens. whether only one determine sees it as a awaken call, you have completed the spectacular element.