They started seeing during his freshman year of college (8 years ago). She was his first real girlfriend and he lost his virginity to her. She sends him an email every month like clockwork and says things like "Lots of my ex boyfriends have stopped talking to me once they got into a relationship. I don't want that to happen to us because I really care about you".He didn't email her for a month or so and she sent him this e-mail. "so...is this your e-mail address still? I feel like a dork.I've been e-mailing you and I haven't heard back and I sent you some really stupid pictures and I'm embarrassed. :) Anyway, I know I'm being ridiculous and unstable, but you're not mad or anything? Sometimes paranoia sets in. I wanted to give you a call, but I don't have your number" Her emails make me angry!
She ends them with "LOVE" and she is persistently begging him to send or pictures or call her. She is married for god sakes! It just seems weird to me.
2007-03-13 11:05:05 · 8 answers · asked by delirium cornucopia 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
They haven't seen each other much over the eight year time period. They aren't really close friends. My theory is that she is having issues in her marriage and she may be feeling lonely. She may be trying to get positive feelings from flirting with her old boyfriend. My boyfriend has never really flirted back with her, but I feel uncomfortable with emails. I've gone on jealous rampages about this, yet he continues to communicate with her.
I just think that once you are married you should try to move on from past relationships.
Maybe I am selfish and it's all just purely platonic and friendly. I just know that I wouldn't continuously email an ex, asking for pictures and such unless I was unhappy in my current situation and looking to have an affair.
2007-03-13 11:20:16 · update #1
your boyfriend responds to these emails, hell yeah you have a right to feel jealous and angry. my boyfriend was married and she is married again. and they still talk, but they have a kid.
2007-03-13 11:10:41 · answer #1 · answered by Wendy G 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I'd say you have every right to be jealous. No wait...not jealous, but angry. Does your boyfriend respond to these emails. It sounds like he wasn't the way she sent that last one.
Communication is the most important thing in a relationship. Secrets become more powerful the longer they are kept secret, and they can end up ruining a relationship. My advice to you is to ask your boyfriend about it and just see if you can talk it through and come to some sort of an agreement. If the woman's married and has a brain (which I don't really know about..it sounds like she might be an immature idiot), then she'll just be friends with him.
Still, don't hide you feelings. Talk about it. Chances are, they're just good friends and nothing more.
2007-03-13 11:12:53 · answer #2 · answered by ? 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like she's got issues - but that shouldn't mean you and your boyfriend have problems too! It's up to your boyfriend, though, you can't force him to do anything.
If you trust him, that all he's saying to her is the sort of thing he could say to any friend, then there's no problem. Sounds like you're not sure, though, or you wouldn't be jealous.
Best idea, is to take a deep breath, and have a NONconfrontational chat with your boyfriend. Tell him that while you trust him and care for him, you feel uncomfortable with the sort of contact he has with his married ex-girlfriend, you're concerned that she's interested in more than she should be. Then wait and see how he responds. If you're still upset, remember it's his choice how he acts, but you have every right to feel like the first priority over any ex-girlfriend.
2007-03-13 11:21:51 · answer #3 · answered by Megs 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
as long as your bf doesn't send her anything that inplies that he cares about her like he does you then your fine. Does it really matter if she send all these crazy emails and he responds to them like a JC Penny subscription. It's the tree falls and no one around to hear it. Just take a step away so you don't hear it and she'll mean nothing to you. My ex still sends me emails with Love this and Love that at the end of it, real pity like tear jerking crap, but who cares, all she did was write it, that doesn't make it true. Focus on what is true and she wont make you angry anymore.
2007-03-13 11:18:20 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Perhaps you should talk to him about this. I completely understand why your upset about this. I'd lose my mind if the girl my guy lost his virginity to kept e-mailing him like that! Especially sine she is married! But if you truly care about this guy, then talking to him should help you, and make you feel a little bit better. (At least!) But if he doesn't reply to the e-mails, then you really shouldn't 'worry' too much. But the thing is, he could be e-mailing her, and just erasing the e-mails. (Sorry to say.) And if it really does annoy him, if SHE really does annoy him, then can't he just 'block' her? Wouldn't he just 'block' her?
I really do feel for you...
2007-03-13 11:18:40 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
For right now, just relax if they don't see each other regularly, you have absolutely nothing to worry about. From what you said, it looks as if they're close friends. Plus, she's married. I don't think you should worry about this. Trust your boyfriend and know that he wont do you wrong.
2007-03-13 11:10:57 · answer #6 · answered by ~Stephie~ 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
yes it is weired,but you have to let you bf know how you fell so he can put a stop to it and you know it hurts you so unless he knows it wont stop,and if she continues to send him emails ask him to chane his #
2007-03-13 11:12:04 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
SHE IS SUPER BORED OR BEING REALLY BAD!!! IGNORE HER!
2007-03-13 11:17:24 · answer #8 · answered by deliah 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋