I'm 21yrs old my fiance and I are getting married on 3-24-07, but my friends and coworkers constantly keep trying to make me change my mind. They say I'm too young and shouldn't do it, Whats wrong with getting married at 21 HELP?? The day is almost here!!!
2007-03-13 10:43:10 · 36 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
I personally had the chance to marry at 21...and am so relieved that I did not. You change so much between 21 and 25, that I would recommend waiting a few years. I am now 28, engaged, and would not change a thing. If you really love him, and he really loves you, then 4 years is not too long to wait.
HOWEVER, I'm not saying you should wait. I would at least ask everyone to give you an honest and complete answer why they feel you should not get married. Being too young is not a good enough answer. Then, sit back and objectively consider what they are saying. Sometimes people who are on the outside have a better view of what is going on. Maybe they know something that you do not.
Or maybe even try a pre-marriage counselor. I know that this is kinda weird this day and age and not usually a first choice...but at 21it is good to have an idea what is waiting for you.
2007-03-13 10:56:54 · answer #1 · answered by elizabeth l 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If you feel you are marrying the right person and have no reservations and know if your heart that you cannot live without this man then go for it!!!
A lot of people think 21 is too young because you still grow up a lot and your interests and goals change. At 21 I wanted to get married, a lot of my friends were and I thought I should too. I had been dating a guy almost 2 years and he even asked my dad if he could marry me. I am very thankful we didn't get married!!! I think I was settling. Now I am 28 and married to the most wonderful man in the world that puts me first and I couldn't be happier. Unfortunately my friends that got married at 21 are no longer married or are having lots of problems. But I think they have issues they had before they got married.
Basically what I am trying to say is make sure you are getting married for the right reasons. Don't be getting married to get married. Most girls dream of this day from the time they can remember and we can't wait for it to happen. We want it to happen so bad that I think we settle.
If you are happy Go For It!! Best of luck!
2007-03-13 10:52:32 · answer #2 · answered by Ambre B 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, if you ask me. It's not the best way to ask people from YahooAnswers because it's gonna make it worst and your gonna get more confuse to think of what other people think of your situation.
Its up to you and you should decide whats the best for you. And it's your fiancee not mine or anyone else. If you love a person then you love him/her. No one will take that a way from you. You decide if you want to marry him or not. Maybe you are young if you look at the age but if you think your ready to have a marriage and your ready to have the responsibility to be a wife then go for it.
But if ever didn't work out between you two. Consider it an experience and learned from it. So, in the future you know the wrongs that you've done and try to make it right.
Maybe your friends just wants the best for you and they're just saying that because they care about you and they don't want you to make a wrong decision in the future. But then again YOU DECIDE. And about your coworkers either there jealous of you because your gonna get married or they think that your just young. But then again YOU DECIDE.
It's your LIFE.
*Love is Blind and Love is Unpredictable.
No one can say what is right and what us wrong about LOVE.
God Bless and Good Luck!
2007-03-13 11:57:38 · answer #3 · answered by MizBeingCute 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you know that you are doing the right thing then what does it matter what anyone else thinks? Maybe 21 is too young for them but just because they think that it does not mean that they're right. If you are both sure what youre doing is right then don't even bother listening to anyone else. At the end of the day you're getting married not them and whether it is a the right move or wrong you two will deal with it.
2007-03-13 10:48:18 · answer #4 · answered by jessicarabbit21 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is a funny subject that I was just talking about with my friend the other day. She got married at the age of 21, and had to deal with alot of scrutiny about her age. I am only 22, will be 23 about a week after my wedding, and I have a child. I have not had one person tell me that I am too young to get married, like it is expected of me to get married just because I have a daughter. Don't listen to what anyone has to say to you because everyone has an opinion. I might tell you that I think you should love apples,(yeah I know bad analogy) but if you don't you don't and it would be wrong for me to try and convince you otherwise. If you love this man with all your heart and want to spend the rest of your life with him then forget what anyone else says. I wish you the best of luck!
2007-03-13 11:07:29 · answer #5 · answered by Me, again 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Most people believe that your life has just started... if you haven't gone to school yet but plan on it... your plans might get postponed due to a new family arising.. and face it.. once married.. you won't necessarily work as hard to protect yourself from pregnancy... Your chances for divorce increase because young couples usually want to experience the world while still young..
I muself plan on getting married within the next 5 years and will be "too young" unless i do wait until 25... I hear that same annoying story all the time.. but if you feel you can handle being married.. then ignore it. If you have found "the one" go for it. You wouldn't want to let him slip away because people think you're not ready...
Best of luck on a difficult decision.
2007-03-13 11:19:27 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
The only real thing that I see wrong and I've said this to other friends, is you've not finished college, you do not have an established career, even if you're going to be a housewife and mother (when it happens) it's always good to have something to fall back on if God forbid something happens and your husband is unable to work (accident, laid off, etc.).
I was married two weeks before my 21st bday and other then bad money decisions that is what I regret daily is that I didn't finish college, I have a job but I don't have a career.
Also make sure you have a nest egg set up..being married is expensive!
2007-03-13 12:06:53 · answer #7 · answered by Kitikat 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Remember how stupid you were when you were 17? When you're 26 you'll look back at what you thought when you were 21 and laugh. You are going to get a LOT smarter and more mature in the next few years, and I think what your friends are worried about is that the person you are now will be quite different from the 'final product' that you become. People who say that age is just a number are completely wrong. Years and experience count.
2007-03-13 10:54:26 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
21 is a very young age to get married nowadays, but it's hard to say because it really depends on the person. Some people are mature than others, etc. But whatever you do, make sure it's something you've thought over and is really ready for. When people are in love, everything seems great. When reality kicks in, things are a lot harder than you think. You have another person to think of now, there are even more bills to pay for, and you have in-laws to deal with too. I am married myself and the only advice I have for others who are still single or in the dating scene is that for them to stay single for as long as possible. Things are so much more easier when it's only you that you have to worry about. Have as much fun as possible because it's a lot harder when you have kids and settle down.
2007-03-13 10:52:59 · answer #9 · answered by Sunshine 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
CONGRATULATIONS!!!!!!!! I think that's terrific and there is nothing wrong with that at all . Love does not have a number and when you fall in love, then marriage is the way to go. Society has a way of sometimes putting pressure on people to do certain things and that's wrong. You have to do what is best for you and if you are madly in love and want to be with your guy forever, then it certainly is the right thing to do! Don't listen to anyone and don't let them spoil it for you because you deserve to be happy. Also if you get married young and decide to have a family, you will find that it's better to have children when you're young. I know I did it! Best of Luck to you both and I'm cheering for you!!!!!!!!!!!
2007-03-13 10:58:48 · answer #10 · answered by lorrina b 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋