My mom has breast cancer and is about to get mastectomy, what's next?

Question

My 46 year old mom has to get a mastectomy in two weeks to remove her breast with cancer. I am so scared and I am trying to be the best supportive daughter that I can be. The cancer also spread to her thyroid. I feel so bad for her because her self esteem is shot. She says a man will never want her again since she will have only one breast. The doctors say she will need chemo and radiation after the surgery. Can anyone tell me how long she will need to go through this treatment? Will she be in a lot of pain? Also any additional comments or knowledge about this topic is appreciated.

Thanks so much to all of you that have posted thus far. I have learned a lot and it's nice to hear from supportive people.

Answer 1

I'm sorry to hear that. My grandmother is going through the same thing as we speak. She was diagnosed with breast cancer and debated on which surgery to have...the mastectomy or the lumpectomy(just to remove the cancer). She chose the lumpectomy and is now going through chemotherapy everyday for six weeks. The doctors said that towards the end of her treatments she'd start to feel very weak. After all this and into her third week of chemo, she wishes she would've just got the mastectomy. Our hugest concern now is the fact that the radiation can cause many things...heart failure, kindey and liver problems. No matter what they tell you, the radiation goes throughout your entire body. I think your mother should get a second opinion...they told my grandmother that she would not have to have radiation treatments after a mastectomy. With your mother's thyroid included I'm not sure the location or affects on that. What ever choice she makes I wish her good luck and I'll be sure to keep her in our prayers. Believe me, I know exactly what you're going through.

Answer 2

I feel your pain and as a cancer survivor know how difficult it is. A woman feels she looses her identity when loosing her breast.
Please encourage her by going on the net and searching for Breast cancer support sites. I also would recommend Cancer Treatment centers of America. They offer both regular and alternative medicine at the same time. I am not here to confuse you but radically mastectomy's are not being done so much any more and it is more just removing the lump. Please check out this alternate source for help they also have a support group. It never hurts to get a second opinion.
url listed below

Answer 3

The purpose for modified radical mastectomy is the removal of breast cancer (abnormal cells in the breast that grow rapidly and replace normal healthy tissue). Modified radical mastectomy is the most widely used surgical procedure to treat operable breast cancer. This procedure leaves a chest muscle called the pectoralis major intact. Leaving this muscle in place will provide a soft tissue covering over the chest wall and a normal-appearing junction of the shoulder with the anterior (front) chest wall. This sparing of the pectoralis major muscle will avoid a disfiguring hollow defect below the clavicle. Additionally, the purpose of modified radical mastectomy is to allow for the option of breast reconstruction, a procedure that is possible, if desired, due to intact muscles around the shoulder of the affected side. The modified radical mastectomy procedure involves removal of large multiple tumor growths located underneath the nipple and cancer cells on the breast margins.

Following surgery, treatment with chemotherapy and radiation at the same time, rather than at different times, seems to improve the odds that a breast cancer won't return,

Answer 4

Usually with a mastecomy, you don't have to do radiation..only chemo for the breast area. With a lumpectomy you do chemo plus radiation. Chemo that is called A/C (adriamycin and cytoxan) is what I did after surgery. It was 4 treatments 3 weeks apart (3 months).

But since it has gone to her thyroid, that may be what they are talking about.Is there any way they can remove the thyroid instead of radiation? That is very near to her voice box and her throat (could cause long term swallowing problems). They could give her thyroid pills to make up for the missing thyroid...but I would be leary of them doing radiation near my throat...

She can get thru the mastectomy and the chemo. I am not sure about the spread to the thyroid, but that doesn't sound good.Yes you have a body self image that includes 2 breasts and hair on your head, but you can eventually learn to re-define yourself as a woman. You are NOT the sum of your body parts. You still have the same mind and feelings and emotions. This will be a real roller coaster ride of emotions for her, but she can eventually find a way to accept herself with all the changes. Whether she will find a man to accept her the way she is ...that is the LEAST of her worries right now.All of her strength should be focused on getting thru this health crisis.

Some tips-
1. Insurance will usually cover a wig for use during chemo if you get the oncologist to write a prescription for a "hair prosthesis". The hair eventually grows back.

2. I found it good to eat saltine crackers, chilled bottled water , arby's or rax roast beef sandwiches (plain), and cold hard boiled eggs when on chemo. It is important to keep your blood levels up so the chemo stays on time and is over quickly as possible. Bland high protein foods are good.

3. Stay AHEAD of the nausea with the anti-nausea pills for chemo...once the nausea takes hold of you, you don't even want the anti-nausea pill.

4. Support groups are essential to go to if they offer them to you and you feel up to it.

Answer 5

There's many different treatments, so your mom's doctor is the one who can best answer on the length of the treatment, as well as her progress while on it. Unfortunately, chimotherapy is a very aggresive treatment and it has different "side" effects on each person, but most likely she'll feel some pain. The biggest "side" effect a person fears though is the image one, for nobody likes been seen hairless, colorless and with big dark circlesl under the eyes. Find someone who can help you and your mom go through this difficul situation, for you most know that attitude and positivism is the biggest "vitamin" against such a cruel illness. Your mom needs mega doses of positivism to help her body counteract the side effects. Many people wouldn't think so, but changing into a healthier, natural diet will help your mother keep strength. I have a relative who got so sick from Chron's disease, where his internal gastrointestinal tracs wouldn't stop bleeding, not even cortison would stop it! So, he took the alternative all natural/organic diet. Believe me, it's not easy to abstain from eating delicious, greasy, jummie junk foods, but loosing health to the point of getting hospitalized and still not getting any good results to the point of getting critical was not better. He's it's the only thing that's helped him so far. He's all better 100% natural diet was his last resource and the only thing that helped him. So, keep doing what you are.Get inform, remain calmed, love your mother in a fun, relaxed and peaceful way and above all, keep faith. Wish you lots of patience and faith and to your mother a prompt recovery. :)

Answer 6

Given what your saying, this is a difficult topic, Ill answer it with knowledge as a Medical professional, but with as much sympathy as I can... when cancer has spread to more then just a breast, or to several areas there of is when they will do either a partial or a full mastectomy, Cancer isnt easy, and your Mother's emotions are natural... your Mother is facing not only a fight against her cancer but a fight against herself... After treatment MANY women go on with normal lives.. the radiation depends on how long it takes for the cancer to go through remission, I have seen some that go through it for 6-8 weeks and do fine, and I have seen some, a Patient I transport who has been fighting it for years.. and getting Chemo... After the surgery she will be in a lot of pain, during radiation you will find your Mother may respond with the normal, and be ill, always sick and nauseated this is NORMAL, nausea loss of appetite vomiting... you have to think your Body is this wonderful living thing, cancer is a invasion..... so your body opens up with the luekocytes (White blood cells) to fight, they bring in their reinforcements (Radiation) to destroy the enemy..and after the battle as with any war..comes the rebuilding...if you want to be supportive know that your Mother is likely to go through bouts of depression, denial she may ask "Why me" "How could this happen" she may feel its her fault....support her tell her others have gone through it, tell her you love her, and that it will be okay.. if she cries hold her cry with her... DONT get angry, you may feel it, you will feel stressed... if she vomits a lot afterwards, keep her on broth make her comfortable, go with her to treatments.... you may find after she gets cold easier.. its about adaption... Radiation after masectomy isnt always needed unless The tumor is larger than five centimeters.
The removed tissue has a positive margin of resection. Four or more lymph nodes were involved. The cancer is multi-centered—it occurred in a number of locations within the breast.... this is going to b a TOUGH time for you and her... the self esteem is part of denial... she will hit a bout of anger.. be prepared....Know that she isnt angry at you.. if she snaps at you let it roll off your back....and above all else, if you have qustions or concerns, they have support groups OR you can go speak with a Doctor and get information as well

Answer 7

my mom has stage 4 carsonima cancer in her breast which spread to the lympnodes under her arm she had her breast removed on 1/07 after she had 32 chemo treatments she is now going to have chemo with herceptin because they couldnt find the lympnodes she is 61 and is very happy she said her cancer give her a better out look on life it dosent matter what other people think it how you think she thanks god everyday for giving her cancer to wake her up and see what she had been missing she hurt more before surgery she had no pain after surgery with some people if they take the lympnodes out they can loose some of the use of that arm i hope i have helped you and i wish her the best of luck

Answer 8

Your mom should tell the doctor from the beginning that she wants reconstructive surgery (plastic surgeons do this best).
You will need to be very supportive, gentle, kind and selfless for awhile while your mom is going through all of this. She will have periods of possibly feeling sick to her stomach after chemo, or weak or not wanting to eat.
One of the most important things you can do for her while she is having therapy is to make sure that every person who walks into the house (you included) WASHES THEIR HANDS FIRST THING. Outside germs can cause her lots of problems...washing with soap is so important to keeping her not exposed to everything that is out there. Her resistance will be down after she has a couple of chemos.
Talk to her, paint her nails, help her do her hair, make sure she takes pain meds BEFORE the pain is bad, at least at first. Be accepting of her physical loss and help her clean and dress the wound if it isn't done at the doctors.
We will all be praying for the both of you!

Answer 9

Here is something that may help her.She will need nutritional support to help the body to recover from this trauma.There is a natural nutritional supplement called Beta 1,3-D Glucan that is a primary cancer treatment in Japan and China.It has shown remarkable anti-tumor activity against a wide range of tumors.It also helps people undergoing radiation or chemotherapy by boosting the immune system.You can research the details at www.dna911.info

Answer 10

you Mom is heading down a long rocky road and will need every ounce of strength you can provide for her. Our family has been touched with Breast Cancer, My ant lost one of her breasts about thirty years ago and is in total remission, she gives her daughter a lot of credit for making it through that journey. There are reconstructive techniques to help make your Mom feel better about herself. I understand how she feels about being un attractive following the surgery, but I think you need to get her to put those concerns on the back burner for now, you do that by making her know how much YOU need her and love her. On the plus side, if she finds someone who accepts her as she is, and there are lots of guys out there who have no problem with this, she will know that she has a potential winner on her hands. I wish you both well. BTW, don't forget to get yourself checked out regularly for the same ailment.