What if your mother thinks you're a loser?

Question

My mom always says i'm a loser because I seem to don't do anything right. She calls me "a crazy girl" all the time, which hurts my feeling very much. I try to ignore her, but sometimes her words are plain brutal...

I will prove to her that I can do things right..by becoming a doctor of medicine one day...She always thinks I'm a loser in life..and I'll show her..

Oh, and she thinks my siblings are losers also..especially my little sister and me..

What can I do to take her words less seriously?

Answer 1

Growing up my mom called me every hurtful name that she could come up with. Some days it rolled off and some days it hit me right smack in the heart. This made it very difficult to say the least because she treated me with such hate and contempt.

My mom had mental issues and did not know better so I would seriously pretend she was saying this : "I love you you're great" try it and and let it mean that to you. Every time she says something like that smile at her and let love fill your heart.

If you spend your life trying to prove to her how great a person you are it will never be enough. PROVE IT TO YOURSELF! YOU ALREADY ARE A GREAT PERSON.

Answer 2

Sounds liek she has issues with herself. Or this is just some twisted way of keeping you on the right track. Either way, you are proving her wrong. If you do become a doctor, she will still think of you as a loser because this is who she is. She can not be pleased. She could not please her mom and it has become a bad cycle of verbal abuse. The only thing you can do is tell her that her words hurt. Tell her in great detail that these words hurt and why. You can say: "Mom, you just said I was a loser on monday. It's wednesday and you called me a loser again. Those words hurt. I get good grades. I stay out of trouble. I treat people well and have lots of friends. Why are you being mean?" If this open tactic doesn't work, then you could try this: As soon as she is about to say you are a loser, cut her off and say: "Oh wait, let me guess, because I'm a loser." Then that should get her to stop (if she's sane). If that doesn't work, convince her to go to counseling (both of you together) or go to the school counselor by yourself. And when you're older you can make the decision whether you want to keep her in your life or not.

Answer 3

She needs help. You can't talk to people that way. Was she abused as well? I would NOT allow my kids to be around her until she gets professional help. Her words will hurt you and I don't think there is anything that can help you take it less seriously. Have you told her how this hurts you. Obviously she should already know that though. I hope you hold your head high and know that you don't have to be a doctor or lawyer or such to make her happy. Don't ever let anyone bring you down, afterall you have to look out for yourself as we all do in this world and a positive attitude will go a long way!

Answer 4

Sounds like mom is a bully. Bullies have to put others down to make themselves feel better. Does she not realize that if you're a loser, she is one too for raising you. Does she have a drinking problem? Drugs? Sounds like she didn't really want kids in the first place. Being in this type of environment will do nothing for you except ease you into a depression, weight gain, and misery. The sooner you leave the better you will be.

Answer 5

You can believe in yourself!! you do not need to prove anything to that woman who is not mature enough to compliment anyone. I think any person is worthwile and can do his or her bit for the world, no matter what mother thinks. If you believe you are doing the things in life you need or want to do, then you are doing the right thing for you and for the world. You do not need your mothers approval.. I know it hurts though, my mom is sort of the same, I am 32 now, and still I am no good to her. I can do nothing right in her eyes. But I have realised that it is she who is doing something wrong here. Misjudging me that is. And so does your mother. It is her loss that she does not see the wonderful children she has and the love that could be hers if she just could see that you are just as okay as everybody else in this world.
Believe in yourself and your sister. Let her know you believe in her too if your mom doesn't.
All the best to you!

Answer 6

hang around good friends more and try to spend less time at home. Know you are better then that and you are not a loser. You can to some degree control your own thoughts. I'm sorry you have to go through this and I hope it gets better.

Answer 7

You are who you want to be, and not what someone tells you,you are.Take controle of your life and where you want to go with it and dont listen to any negative remarks.dont let anyone stand in your way.JUST a little ? What did your mother do with her life,other than ,controle others,critisize,verbaly abuse,and thats only what youv told us.She should be encouraging you in every choice you make for yourself.ASK yourself what does mum actually do.We can all bring our kids up,and keep house.WE all do.PLUS,PLUS,PLUS.

Answer 8

well you know what you take your own words and use them prove her wrong and do something with your life.and in the end you'll show her who's the real loser. im kind of in the same situaton where my mother calls me all sorts of names

Answer 9

dont believe them. if you choose to believe them...that is your fault in accepting the words as true. consider the source (your mom) of the person who says bad things about you.
does it make her feel better? she is the one who raised you...give the words back to her...peace

Answer 10

YOUR mom needs some counseling ASAP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!Tell your teacher about the abuse now!!!!!!!!