I am really unsure of what to do & need advice. This morning i took delivery of a parcell for the elderly couple next door as they were out, when i called with it i noticed several photo's of my son (3) playing in the back garden.
I havent told my husband yet as i worry what his reaction may be, the couple are old & dont have kids of their own, but still i am worried.
Any advice please?
2007-03-13 03:26:42 · 22 answers · asked by jayne 1 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Parenting
I would talk to your husband and then approach them in a civil manner. Ask them why they have taken pictures of your son. They may be completely harmless, but you never know. Tell them that you would appreciate them not taking pics of him without your permission. Then talk to your son and ask him what he does when they are taking pics. Is he just playing, do they play together, etc...
2007-03-13 03:35:47 · answer #1 · answered by punkin_eater26 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
This is a horrible world we live in when you have to worry about such things. You can't be too careful. I don't think calling the police is the right action at all. You could call the police or check the police website for a list of predators in your area. If the pictures were ill-intentioned they would not be in public display in the neighbors home. Your son is 3 years old and should not be out of your eyesight and earsight in your yard for any reason. When outside he is clothed appropriately. Your son should be taught now to get your permission to speak to adults as a manners lesson. Your son is old enough to also learn some lessons about his body and privacy.
As a family we have friends throughout our neighborhood. My son, 6, and daughter, 3 are always accompanied by either my husband or myself and never left alone.
Tangent: My mom and dad grew up 20 miles away from each other, met and fell in love after highschool. My mom was at her in-laws looking at a photo album to find that her mother-in-law had taken multiple pictures of my mom has a child, years before they knew one another. All my grandma saw was a very cute girl twirling a baton at the parade.
2007-03-13 06:07:26 · answer #2 · answered by Marjery B 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I don't know how to react to this question. I think that is very strange for neighbors to have unauthorized photos of your son. Very strange but not illegal. Some of the people on here answered your question saying that you should call the police. What for? What crime has been committed? What laws have been broken?
I must admit it must have been very unusual and creepy to see this but still not illegal.
I think you should talk to your husband and then the two of you in a very calm courteous manner, go and talk to the neighbors. Tell them what you saw and ask the meaning behind it. Hopefully its just too elderly people admiring a little boy. I think some people on here are being way too paranoid over this.
2007-03-13 04:29:42 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Are you pretty friendly and close with your neighbors?? Do they really like your son? If you guys are pretty good friends then I wouldn't worry as much...but still definately discuss it with them. Since they are older, they don't have children around and they may feel like your son is almost a grandson for them...(granted it's still a little odd)
If you really don't know them at all and really don't talk to them...that would worry me a little more. It's probably completely harmless and innocent...but I would find it a little weird and creepy. I would speak up (but in a nice, polite way). Just say that you would rather they not photograph your son without your permission.
You just never know about people these days...even sweet little elderly neighbors. When it comes to your children...it's ALWAYS better to be safe than sorry!
2007-03-13 03:33:46 · answer #4 · answered by LittleRoo 4 · 5⤊ 0⤋
Since when is a crime? One day my boyfriend was at the beach and a girl asked his help because a guy was taking her pictures. He followed the guy everywhere and the police stopped them.When he told they what happened, they said they couldn't take the pictures back or take the guy to the jail because isn't a crime.So he left whith her pictures and end of story.
If I was you, I wouldn't let them stay with your son anymore.I am brazilian and one time in Brazil I heard in the radio that a father discovered that his neighboor, a blind man that was taking care of his baby boy, used to put the baby's mouth in his penis that was covered with something sweet that is called in spanish "leche azucarada".You have to be VERY careful with kids, specially that your son is too young to know what is wrong and right.
2007-03-16 09:06:06 · answer #5 · answered by helloy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It would really depend on the relationship you have with the neighbors. If you are close, they may see your son as a surrogate grandson, since they have none of their own. I don't know if I would be calling the police over it. I may ask them why they are taking pictures of your son. I don't think they would display them openly if they were doing anything they saw as offensive. They may not realize you would have a problem with it. Maybe tell them that it makes you uncomfortable and offer them a school picture instead. Obviously if you fear for your sons safety call the police, but taking pictures of your son in the garden doesn't mean they're thinking about hurting him. But you know your neighbors better than any of us on here does. I agree it's a little strange, but I don't know if it's cause for great concern.
2007-03-13 03:48:57 · answer #6 · answered by ? 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋
This is probably innocent, because they are elderly and had the pix out, not hidden. For your peace of mind I would ask them about it in a kindly way. My parents would have NO IDEA that it was not socially acceptable to take pix of someone else's kid in a back yard; it is only our newer generation that sees that as weird.
A few years ago in AZ I had a friend that was trying to prove the people in the apt above his had like a dozen people living there, so he videotaped them leaving, and they called the police, who came and told him he'd be arrested if he did that again. So I am wondering if they were bluffing or if there really are ordinances against that type of thing...
2007-03-13 03:46:47 · answer #7 · answered by Cris O 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
They are elderly and probably don't understand your stress at seeing pictures of your son that you didn't say that they could take. You should look at it calmly first. go over and discuss your feelings with them...My guess is that they look on your son as a grandson and its totally harmless. Discuss it with them before flying off the handle and calling the police. Gauge what they say to you as to what next steps should be taken.
2007-03-13 04:22:38 · answer #8 · answered by mommy_2_liam 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Don't over react, first speak with your son and see if he can remember what he happened when the neighbors shot the pictures of him, then speak with your husband and tell him that they have pictures of your son. Decide together what you are going to say to the couple, if anything, because since they have them out in the open, the couple probably doesn't think they've done anything wrong.
2007-03-13 03:58:54 · answer #9 · answered by mark my words 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Look on your local state sexual offender search, if nothing comes up then invite the couple over to diner,if you like the couple next door, be sure to be courteous not angry and express your concerns in an adult manner and explain that your not accusing anything, but your just concern. Hope for the best but expect the worse. "Better safe then sorry"
2007-03-13 04:06:45 · answer #10 · answered by shocker83_fear_me23 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋