Are they selfish?

Question

Last year my parents had a Ruby wedding anniversary and me & my sister gave them a week in a lovely hotel in Prague as a gift. My sister also got married and I gave her the money for the wedding photographer as a present. I wanted to do both of these so that's not the issue, but I had my 10th wedding anniversary (also last year) and received no card from either parents or sister and was given £5 towards an anniversary meal from my mum..

Answer 1

They should treat you how they expect to be treated that wasn't nice think they could have done better thatn that, when the next thing comes round for your parents or sisiter give something a little smaller to see how they react. i Know it not what you spend it's the thought that counts but they didin't really think much of you for your anniversary did they.

Answer 2

That is very sad because you were so generous for both your parents and your sister. I agree with the first answerer who said the 10 year wedding anniversary is something you and your husband share, but it is not reason for your family to go all out.

Answer 3

my brother and sister-in-law had their 11th anniversary last August,my mum and dad gave them money and gifts.
My mum and dad had their ruby wedding anniversary in December,my brother and sister-in-law gave my mum and dad a card a week late.
I think its extremely unfair of your family to treat you like this but sometimes we give extravegant gifts and expect extrevegance back when in actual fact a card is enough.
I keep telling my mum and dad to stop buying gifts for anniversaries but they dont listen AND when their own anniversary comes along they expect gifts back.
You know for next year now that a card will do for your family anniversaries,i only ever give cards for every anniversay.
The only people i buy for are my parents.
Im getting married myself this year and have already told my family not to be buying us anniversary gifts as we dont want them,a card is enough

Answer 4

I have to agree with Ya-Sai. 10 years, although great, is not a specific milestone. If they gave you a card or present for the others years then may be mention it in a jokey way to see the reaction.
Congratulations for the 10 years.

Answer 5

Not having a go here hun, but the problem with expecting something back is we always get disapointed....just be happy for what you give then there won't be a problem...it doesn't mean though that we should expect something back...."oh no! I'm not expecting something back" I hear you say, but you clearly were....that's why you're upset about it.....sorry Babe, I've been there myself & had to learn......you're soooo going to hate me now, but it's you being selfish, not them.....
you did ask!!!!!!!
KB
Treat others how you would like to be treated doesn't mean in a financial way.........

Answer 6

Weird I'm sorry that they didn't make more of a deal about your anniversary.
You seem to be very generous and they aren't, maybe you should tell them that your upset that they didn't make a fuss of your anniversary, they should know your upset.
Also it shouldn't stop you from being generous if that's how you feel.
Happy 10th anniversary by the way!

Answer 7

I think your family know you are soft with them by giving, I know you get pleasure out of giving,I would stop the gifts now don't be used spend your extra money on your own family if your parents and sister are selfish,as it sound as if they are.

Answer 8

Seems like if you can afford to give trips to Europe you don't need money.

Seems also like you think a good deal ABOUT money. Maybe too much for your parents.

Good luck.

Answer 9

Well, a ruby wedding and a wedding are big events. 10years of marriage is great, but it really is a personal celebration between you and your other half.
Congratulations.

Answer 10

Next time one of them has another anniversary, you now know what to give them.