Usually my boyfriend and I get along really well. But then out of nowhere he'll start giving me one word responses and snap at me. This has happened ever since we started dating, but more frequently lately. He'll just leave the room or sit there and not talk. I try asking him what's wrong but he won't tell me anything. It happened while we were out to lunch today. We were having a good time. Then he all of a sudden didn't want to talk anymore and was just like "fine, whatever" to everything I said, in a really mean voice. So we came back home. I told him that I feel like I always upset him somehow and because of that I feel like a bad gf. He wouldn't say anything to that so then I started crying (like always do in this situation, I don't know what else to do) So then he got to leave. Then he basically said he wasn't mad until I started crying. But what else am I supposed to do? I feel like I'm walking on eggshells around him.
2007-03-12 19:17:21 · 8 answers · asked by Stephanie M 1 in Health ➔ Mental Health
Whoa! He is really passive-aggresive. Crying won't get you anywhere. Try to be strong. Tell him that you don't have time to play these stupid games with him and then leave when he tries to pull this sh**. Tell him to call you when he's done pouting. I do think he has a personality disorder. Check out these web-sites. Good luck!
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Passive-aggressive
http://www.passiveaggresive.com/articles/
2007-03-12 19:37:31 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
your boyfriend is very sensitive and insecure, you could have set him off any which way (checking out a guy walking past, talking about a guy), it hurt him because he is so sensitive so he shut down. At first he gets mad because he believes you are disrespecting who he is and then he gets depressed because he may think you are talking about or checking someone else out and so will soon leave him. So then he just thinks why fight it? and ignores you because he does not want to invest any energy into working it out if you are just going to leave him.
Nothing is wrong with you, you have done nothing wrong. Either his father or mother treated the other this way, hence he learnt it from them and it has become his defensive mechanism. It may become worse and turn into a control thing or it may just be a immature thing he will eventually grow out of.
You need to talk to him, when things are well, tell him to communicate and not bottle it up, make him talk to someone (a teacher/or psychologist), either way he needs to learn to communicate his feelings, you can help by listening when he tries to and not get defensive or angry that he would think something like that. make him open up, let him trust you but be careful so as not to let the relationship become a control thing.
2007-03-13 02:31:27 · answer #2 · answered by roman 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
been there done that. yeah he's got some sort of disorder. he's probably bipolar. he needs help. tell him. if he gets mad and snaps at you leave him. trust me it's not worth walking on eggshells for years and years until you get tired of it.
my experience would be to leave him. and stay away.
2007-03-13 02:23:49 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Evidently, yes. But don't waste your time trying to figure out what it is, just leave. Things will NOT get any better and you can ruin your own life trying to keep him happy. Time to move on!
2007-03-13 02:25:52 · answer #4 · answered by surlygurl 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
He may have many things wrong with him, but he definitely is passive-aggressive. He will drive you nuts if you stay with him much longer. His type (not that I know him) does not change. Get out while you can honey. It isn't worth it.
2007-03-13 03:29:54 · answer #5 · answered by Patti C 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
wow i dont know if its a personality disorder cause i am not a pscyhologist but i thik tis kinda scary he is nice one minute and the next minute he is all rude and stuff. kinda like a doctor jekyll and mr hyde type of deal. be careful!
2007-03-13 02:27:02 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
the question is . why do you put up with it?
He may not be ready for a relationship.
He might just be the kind of guys who is like that. And you have to be patient
2007-03-13 03:44:55 · answer #7 · answered by clcalifornia 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Get rid of him. He is an emotional bully. There are plenty of nice guys out there.. I know you like/ love him, but he won't change.
2007-03-13 02:27:17 · answer #8 · answered by oneblondepilgrim 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋