I'm 23 and i have almost completely lost my sex drive. How can i get it back???

Question

for the past 2 years almost i have had almost absolutely no sex drive and i'm only 23 years old!!! My girlfriend usually has had a very high sex drive, but i somehow i've not been able to deliver. recently she has stopped wanting to have sex all together, which worries me a LOT about our relationship. i still love her very much and find her very attractive, but for some reason i can't seem to ever be in the mood. also, i've never been able to go for more than a few minutes. i have never had good stamina, and have never been to confident in bed. early in our relationship we were having sex almost once a day, but it didn't last for very long. now were lucky to have sex one every 2 weeks, and even luckier if it's good. so, does anyone know how i could possibly try and fix myself or am i completely broken? and, no, i'm not going to buy your pleasure pills from your website. i want a natural remedy....

Answer 1

You may have low thyroid or other medical problem. Better get checked. Lol it sounds like you are married. Actually the problem may be that you are not married and you have a conscience. After all the Scriptures say that the marriage bed is undefiled. Don't let the media be your guide. They exaggerate sex cause supposedly sex sells. Everyone is different and if you are a busy person your focus is not on sex all of the time. I wish you well. Mmm

Answer 2

Ok, no pills, no drugs. The male sex drive is intimately linked with your overall health, fitness and most especially testosterone. You haven’t said anything about your physical condition so it is hard to tell. Here is a list of things that can affect the male sex drive.

- If you are overweight or unfit this will affect your sex drive.
- If you are depressed this will affect your sex drive.
- If you do not sleep enough, this will affect your sex drive.
- If you are stressed, or overworked this will affect your sex drive.

You might not be producing enough testosterone, again this can be for a number of reasons.
- Try some moderate exercise (eg walking every day or 3 times a week)
- Weight Training would be the best idea
- Fix up your diet, try and include more EFAs (essential fatty acids), eg nuts, avocadoes

Take some libido enhancing supplements. (Ok you’ve said you don’t want to be sold on pills, but maybe try Horny Goat Weed or any Male Health Formula. Talk to someone at your local Health Food Store. Maybe even Tribulus Terrestis would help)

If none of these approaches work, you might need to see your doctor to get your testosterone levels checked. I think they can do this through a spit test (it’s not confronting or invasive). In a sever case you might need HRT (Hormone Replacement Therapy) – basically drugs from your doctor, but this is HIGHLY UNLIKELY.

Getting more sleep. Going to the gym. Doing more exercise. Having a better diet and taking a supplement should solve the problem.

I’m not doing this for a hard sell, but if you like my answer, then check out my site. Thanks and good luck!

Answer 3

There can be many reasons why you have developed a low sex drive. Some medications can do this, so if are you taking any read the packaging. Sometimes the bodies hormone levels drop due to underlying illness, so you really should see your Dr to get some blood tests. The most likely cause is a mental block, and that is something that happens to alot of men at one time or another, for many different reasons. Stress, either from work, or within your relationship could have triggered it. Or even how the relationship is developing, many men struggle with the intensity a deep relationship brings. Often when a pattern has set in, like you are describing, it is very difficult to break out of without some kind of help. A relationship councillor would be able to give you advice, either as a couple or on your own, and would be a good place to start to reverse this set back. Your Dr would be able to refer you to one.
Sex drives do vary a lot between men, and alot of men say they have sex far more often than they actually do, so don't think that once every two weeks is too much to worry about.
You and your girlfriend really need to talk about this situation, if you can be open and honest about how it is making you both feel, you will resolve this quicker. As a suggestion, you might try setting aside one particular evening a week, make it a special evening, do something different everytime, go for a long walk, or to the cinema, and have a relaxed meal; and then afterwards share a bath or shower together. Then give each other a massage, or just cuddle, but don't have any sexual contact at all (this is very important, and you both must agree to this before). Its all to do with discovering each others bodies again, without the worry of having to perform sexually. In time, you will feel ready to intitiate sex again, but you should just start out with foreplay, and then oral sex (if you do this).
As for your stamina, remember many women can't orgasm just through penetrative sex, and often need other stimulation to the clitoris as well, so spend more time in foreplay, even bring her to orgasm before you have full sex. There is a techinque for learning to delay your own orgasm, it involves practice, either with your girlfriend (if you feel comfortable with this) or on your own. You need to masterbate, but release your grip just before you orgasm, then wait as long as it takes for the pressure to subside, then start over, and do this as many times as you can without actually ejactulating. It may take some time, but you will find that you can start to control yourself better, and when you do get back to having sex with your girlfriend, just pull out for a few moments, and then carry on.
The most important thing to remember is you will get through this, and that being in love is the important part of a relationship, having sex is just one of the fun bits, and not so important that it needs to dominate the relationship.
I wish you both well.

Answer 4

sex isnt everything. and like the saying goes its not the size it how you use it {it meaning other things as well}. You probably feeling pushed or maybe scared relax. you didnt worry about it and things will happen. it really depends on you and if your comfortable with your surrounding at the time. Are you recently taking any meds or under alot of stress that too can be a issue. something as simple as high blood pressure or maybe your worried you be as good as you would like to be. be thankful if getting aroused is the issue on hand..no pun..be thankful most guys its lasting as long as we woman would like. you can take your time with for play and well in the end end up having better sex than someone who just lets say undid his pants and well its over before it started...try webmd look under ed..not saying that's what it is but read and it will help

Answer 5

I would suggest going to a urologist.

Sounds like the frustration is building instead of the excitement - you can't get a natural remedy until you know what you're getting a remedy for.

Doctor can help you find out.

Answer 6

1st have a medical Doctor rule out physical causes. You should also consult the Doctor for any pills you take over the counter and herbal. If all is clear medically, explore other issues with a counselor.

Answer 7

I am not selling anything, I think I would go to the Doctor and be checked out you may have a low hormone problem and that is why you have a low sex drive. I would have her go to the doctor with you so she knows what is going on and that it isn't her of why you cannot preform

Answer 8

i think u r better stop making love 4 one mth completely.within this 1 mth try to exercice more n eat better nutritious food together with ur gf.u can go somewhere holidays too 4 relaxing ur body.after 1 mth then u try it n i do believe u should be much better than b4.good luck.

Answer 9

Ginseng tea, hot steam baths, lots of tantric yoga and running should help. Also, try eating tiger's testicles. I hear it helps. If you are low on hormones, contact the doctor about Viagra and natural sources of testosterone.

Answer 10

Go see a doctor. You may have some physical problem that does this to you.

If all else fails: spray it with Solarcaine - makes it rigid for a couple of hours.