Why does my ex ignore me?

Question

My boyfriend and i have been dating for a year an half but we have been fighting a lot lately, we just broke up couple days ago. He is very stubborn...i have his math book and i told him since we are not going to be together i want to give him his book sometime this week but he wont respond to me...i also told him he was very immature in this relationship and i feel like he never loved me even though he said he did but when we would get into a fight he would say **** you and not talk to me for couple of days..so today i texted him telling him i need to give him his math book and that i hope we can end up on good terms someday but he wont text me back or call me...he wont say anything...why does he do that? how do i get him to talk to me? wait..he just text me asking me why do i try to talk to him and i texted him back saying i only asked when he wanted his math book and i said i wont talk to him anymore then, how do i get him to come back to me and want me back and try to get me back?

Answer 1

He definitely feels that you don't allow him to have his space. What to you might seem like "suffocating" in a relationship, to me it may seem like you're ignoring me. People perceive these things in different ways and to different extents, which can and will eventually cause unhappiness and frustration. By messaging him, you refuse to aknowledge his need of being left alone (even if you and everyone else wouldn't see it as "nagging"), and this will result in him totally ignoring and avoiding you.

I'm not sure how big a deal a math book is, maybe if it was some ID or driver's license I'd understand why you want him to have it back, but I believe (and correct me if I'm wrong) that you miss him and would like to at least be close to him, if not start over. You won't get him to talk to you just now, and the best - and most difficult - way of getting back on good terms with him is leaving him alone, for a week, two, a month. He will get back to better feelings eventually, when he gets past this frustration he has at the moment. Hope you will be able to find this patience inside of you, and you will see the outcome for yourself. Hope this helps.

Answer 2

It seems like that he has lose interest with your relationship, dont take it personal, these things happen all the time and often its nobody's fault, just incompatibility. Dont be too attached, go on with the next chapter of your life, its a big world, and there are better things in life. You may want to ask again if he want his book back, if he said no, then dispose it at your will, but if he said yes then see what happen when you meet again, if you feel that he dont care anymore, you need to accept that its really over.