what should i do!?

Question

i think there's something wrong with me... i can't concentrate in school (especially math) and i never ever do my homework because i can't concentrate at all! i think i might have A.D.D... i've asked my mom about it and she just says i'm lazy! but i'm really not... and i try really hard to beat it but it doesn't ever work. my grades are dropping... and i don't know what to do. also, i think i might have depression, sometimes i have suicidal thoughts and stuff... could this all be linked? help please! (don't know if this makes difference-- i'm 15, female)

Answer 1

I am not an expert on ADD, but it seems to me you would have had that at a younger age. Depression really affects a person's ability to think and remember things, so that could be part of it. Are you keeping track of your periods? PMS is the 10 days or so before your period, and some girls/ladies get that really really bad. In retrospect, all that time I cried over my math homework in junior high and high school was probably PMS. OR PMS making depression worse (I'm bipolar). If the suicidal thoughts are more than a passing thing, if you're dwelling on it for a few hours once in awhile, I would say that is serious and you must tell your mom so you can be seen by a mental health specialist. If you are actually forming plans, like how you are going to do it, writing a note, that kind of thing, getting ready to do it, that is an emergency and you need to be hospitalized for a quick and effective intervention to help you. (Doesn't sound like you are that bad).

When I was depressed horribly in college, what I would do is get to school a couple hours early so there was nothing else to do but study. At least I would get something done! Obviously, you can't do that, but you could go hang out at the library or some other place where there are no interruptions, no phone calls and not much noise.

Here are my depression tips:

If your depression seems to be more of a problem in the winter, try to get more sun. You could have seasonal affective disorder, or SAD, or your depression could have a seasonal component, meaning you can get depressed other times of the year, but you tend to have more trouble in the winter.

Try meditation tapes like progressive muscle relaxation or guided imagery. They may seem silly at first, but they work!! They help reduce stress, which makes depression worse. Maybe the library has one of those. Oh, and make sure you listen to happy music. It is so easy to listen to depressing music when you are depressed, you have to do the opposite.

Go out with friends, and if you don't have any, find a club or after school activity to join and MAKE yourself go until you actually look forward to it. Isolation makes depression worse.

Exercise at least 1/2 hour a day, and anytime you feel really hyper or depressed. Exercise is a great mood stabilizer and cuts down on anxiety a lot.

If your depression makes it hard for you to sleep, here are some good "sleep hygeine" tips so you can sleep better. Like go to bed and get up about the same time each day, even weekends. Don't do stuff that pumps you up right before bed, like exercising and watching action movies or using the computer. You want to use that last hour to wind down-Take a bath? Make the bedroom really dark, cover up the clock radio, even so the light doesn't shine at you. If you live in the rackety city, use a noise generator (makes wave sounds and the like) to cover up the city sounds. Or you can play a nature sounds CD on your boom box at night. You can get them cheap now, and I bet the library has them. Avoid caffeine in the afternoon and evening. ***Not getting enough sleep can cause problems thinking and studying too!! A teenager needs more sleep than an adult, think 9 or 10 hours.

Put a lot of colorful things around your bedroom, happy type things, and keep the blinds open and let the sun in. Put on some pretty clothes. Make a list of things that make you happy. Here's some things on my list: A basket full of fluffy kittens, bread fresh from the oven, Fireworks popping on a warm summer evening, The first fireflies of the season, the scent of Jergen's cherry almond lotion, The crisp sound of a saltine cracker breaking, fresh sheets on the bed, etc. Use all your senses and read that list when you are having a hard time.

Work on time management if being overwhelmed and late for things and too much to do is getting to you. Try not to procrastinate.

If you have a pet, give it more attention. Petting a dog or cat is really helpful for depression and anxiety, too. Watch your aquarium fish. Pet or talk to the bird. Whatever. Even sleeping with a stuffed animal is comforting.

I hope some of these tips will help you. To sum up, find an environment to study where there are no distractions (including music!) and make sure you get enough sleep. If the suggestions above don't help very much, you probably are stuck in depression and need professional help. (remember to check out that PMS thing, I was a big dummy and never figured it out until I was 40.)

All the best to you!!

Answer 2

You really need to tell your mom ALL of the details you have given here. If you feel you simply cannot talk to her about this then go to a counselor or school teacher-- any trusted adult that can help you get the help you need for the depression and suicidal thoughts.
It is "normal" (what's normal when you are a teenager?) to be depressed at this time of life, but you still must address it. Just like it is normal to get sick sometimes and you should still go to the doctor for that as well.
You will win this sweetheart. Just stay brave, get the help you need, and learn how to love YOU. That is very important! Take care of you. You are a wonderful creature full of love and imagination. You are easy to love-- love you!!!!!!!!!!
As for the ADD simple things like diet modification and getting 8-10 hours sleep should help you concentrate better. Eat more fish (tuna is especially good) and get more sleep. Research the other foods that are good for a poor attention span and bring them into your diet as well.
I wish you much self love and blessings.

Answer 3

I'm sorry to hear you are feeling so bad---I wish your mom was more help to you. If you are feeling suicidal, be it tonite, tomorrow, whenever- call the suicide hotline--- it is completely confidential- you talk to a counselor and believe me, they are very, very helpful. If you are ok tonite, call tomorrow and get set up to see a counselor--and a doctor-- your mom will not know-- it is CONFIDENTIAL-- you may need to have an exam-- you can be having mood swings due to hormonal imbalances- or a thyroid problem also can cause your symptoms.

You can ask your mom to take you to a doctor or you can go to your own doctor and that doctor CANNOT TELL YOUR MOM YOU WERE THERE. Or there are free clinics--you can also go into your schools guidance counselor and she can help you find a doctor and the help you need.........don't panic .....what you are experiencing is more normal than you think, thank god you recognized you have a problem before it was too late............good luck to you.........

Answer 4

I'm sorry your Mom isn't listening, but I'm a Mom and I'll do what I can. Teenagers go thru many phases like this. It could be hormonal but you should listen to your inner voice. Talk with a school counselor. They may be able to help you get tested for various things. If it's hormonal then take care of yourself by getting at least 10 hours of sleep and good diet. Make sure you're eating protein daily. Lack of iron can cause these symptoms too. Talk with the school nurse also. She can help you with the diet. Google websites for healthy diets for female teens like the food pyramid. Please call a hotline whenever you feel suicidal! Many teens experience this, I did too but please don't ignore it. Talk to someone soon. Good luck dear.

Answer 5

behavior modification works really well with people who have A.D.D. its hard to od b.mod. on yourself but if you wanted you could start rewarding yourself everything you do your homework or have your mom do it you need to also start getting rid of all of the distractions that are in the room you are trying to do your homework in you should also stop in sometime and talk to your math teacher about this problem and they might have some suggestions for you

Answer 6

depression comes with condentration problems. when i was in high school i had the same problem and my parents thought the exact same thing. what i wish i would have done is talk to someone about it but i never did. so encourage you to tell somone about your thoughts. if you don't feel comfortable talking to your parents toalk to a trusted teacher or a school counceler but please say something to some body there is stuff that can be done about it. ps math has always been my worst subject as well

Answer 7

Is there a school guidance counselor or a teacher you truly trust that can help you. I think if you talk to them first and they get an idea of what you are going through, maybe they can speak to your parents. Your parents might understand better if its coming from another adult.

Answer 8

i have ADD, i took medicine for it all throughout elementary school middle school and high school, i was held back in the first grade because of the fact that i had ADD. my parents and teachers thought that it woudl be a good idea for me to repeat it b/c i couldnt focus properly. which is your problem. my opinion is for you to talk to your doctor about your school problems. they are the ones that can make the correct judgement about your situation. if you say your trying then it sounds to me like you could have ADD. medicine helps a lottttttt. good luck. sorry thats all i could attempt to help you with.

Answer 9

Exercise. It helps with depression. Get tons of sun light. See a psychiatrist to see if you have depression or if it's ADHD or whatever.

Answer 10

being a teenager is hard in itself
why dont you go to a clinic and
have an assessment done it will
relieve your mind for sure