i've been seeing my boyfriend for a year now, and I couldn't love him more (i say that all the time, yet I find myself loving him more as days pass...weird, huh?), but because it's outside of my race i'm getting a lot of heat for it. my parents are CONVINCED that this is a dead end relationship and i should get out of it immediately. I disagree. We've been so happy for the past year and we haven't even fought once. We're two mature adults who know how to handle a relationship.
The other night I was at a party (my bf wasn't there) and i was hangin out with some guys outside, just talking. The guys have a tendency to make sexual innuendos and i played along. (i.e. we were smoking hookah and they were pretending the tip was a penis and they were holding it down near their crotch and i would smoke it, etc.) I was having fun just getting along with these guys really well (these guys ARE of my race) and I wonder how different things would be if I wasn't with my boyfriend, but...
2007-03-12 16:49:20 · 5 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
....with one of these guys. I'm sure my family would be really happy about it, and I've been thinking about it A LOT this weekend, but the only thing that I keep going back to is how much I love my boyfriend and how much ups (together) and downs (with my family) we've been through and how we've been so strong together. I love him with all my heart, but I can't help but wonder......
(I'm 21, and my boyfriend's 25, if any of that matters...)
2007-03-12 16:51:01 · update #1
After a year you do wonder, but if that is it then you are safe. If you are playing into these other boys hands then you need to respect your boyfriend enough to tell him. Maybe you don't fight because you aren't truthful!
He needs to know you are questioning the relationship. Maybe you need to hear him say it is okay and he loves you and he will always be with you if that is what you want!!
These hookah boys are losers!! They are bad news and just because you think your parents like them better could you spend the rest of your life with them, could you trust them with your life, could you raise a family with them?? These are the long term questions you need to ask yourself. If you ar not at a point where you are thinking long term and your BF is you need to be honest and tell him!! If you are ready to fully commit yourself to him you should tell him that too!!
Be honest! The grass is NOT always greener on the other side!!
Good Luck!!
2007-03-13 03:15:06 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Honey, just please leave this descent man alone. You suppose to be in love so much until you can't stand it. One night with hanging out with a moraless crowd and now you have doubts. Your parents was right, this is a go nowhere relationship, and it's not because he's black, it's because you are not good enough for him. You have in one night, disrespected him by having idle chit chat with guys that probably don't want to do anything but get you high and have sex with you. once they degraded you and disrespected your bf by making those sexual ''innuendo'' and you was making a slut of yourself by smoking dope and dropping down to their croutch and calling it fun you need to be with your race honey and not mess this man's life up. All the while your parents thinking, because of his race, he would bring you down, little did they know, that they have a dope smoking, unfaithful, low rate, racist for a daughter. I called you a racist, because, after a year of what you clam to be paridise. One night on the town with your own race and you are willing to toss him to the side, so you can play sex games with your Race. Things will be different, Just go your way and the two mature adult you were mentioning is NOT YOU. Why would you as a woman, would allow ANYBODY to hold a joint, pen, stick or even gold down at their croutch and you go down there and smoke it? What kind of game is that? except to make you look as bad as it would sound if you was to tell him.If it was all that fun being degraded in that way, tell your parents, the black guy isn't the one they should be frowned upon, it the thing they birthed and called their DAUGHTER.
You don't know what love is and you should tell him that you can no longer pretent to love him anymore, your love for nasty fun comes first. WHAT A WAIST OF A YEAR FOR HIM.
2007-03-20 02:58:12 · answer #2 · answered by Go GO Ressa 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Seems like when we are faced with the odds against us we find it somewhere inside to remain strong for any reason let alone the right ones. I think the negative energy you catch from your family puts a weak link in your chain... natural because your family is who you are. But the excitement and the thrill of love is so strong it tends to keep you at an uneven pace...which for you is starting to wear you down. The only advice I know to give is make yourself happy and make your decisions on how you can sleep with yourself and your conscience. I feel you are just starting to see how hard this relationship is going to be to keep. Best of luck for you and your happiness.
2007-03-20 23:38:13 · answer #3 · answered by Alley 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I dont understand why u r wondering u supposely love this guy, are u insecure about the race thing and u wanna get out or what.
2007-03-20 15:21:15 · answer #4 · answered by Lilac 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
only you know if you are ready for a relatioship,dont break hearts cause the guilt sucks.
2007-03-20 20:45:13 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋