he broke up with me...TWICE! and all in 3 months...although we were kinda seeing each other b4...but there was just so much drama and stuff...and he says he loves me but he needs to grow up...so I promised him I'd wait for him...but it sounds as if he just doesn't want to be with me every...and I just can't hate him...and I still love him...how do you get over someone when your heart doesn't want to?
2007-03-12 16:41:59 · 20 answers · asked by Po_0ffie 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I watched a movie not too long ago and a step mother was talking to her step daughter and the jest of it went something like this: It's not what you are feeling but what your heart knows. Will this man take care of you when you are ill, will he love you when you are old?
The man you want to marry is the one God has planned for you because no one knows you better or loves you more. Get involved in a Christian church and ask Jesus Christ to bring you the man he has planned special just for you; the one who will bring you joy.
These days we women are raising kids alone, waiting for the call that never comes, all because of "feelings" and often lustful and wasteful feelings because we are living worldly instead of spiritually. We do not have to think about men like that at all. satan is a liar and wants you to think there is something wrong with a decent man who wants to get to know you because satan likes when he can make us into puppets and keep us captive to a worldly man so he can steal, kill and destroy you (kill your joy, steal your youth/life, and hurt/destroy your fatherless children, etc). But Jesus is the healer; He can heal all your burdens if you ask Him.
We can always change that thought. We do not have to dwell on that person at all if we choose not to. The Word of God tells us not to think on anything too much less we day dream and we are to guard our thoughts and our hearts. We need to learn to take each thought captive because it is Written that we are to think on things that are lovely and pure.
The man you want is the man that wants you, the one who will be there for you and your children and can't wait to come home and to bless you just because God has given him a heart to share this life with you...and He will create in you a new creation too.
What you don't want is the never ending challenge, chasing someone around calling on their cell phone, always being the back up, knowing whats up and either listening to excuses lies and deceit from him or creating your own in a darkened state of mind. God gives us a sound mind; you can see clearly and He will help you make the right choices and be joyfully complete if you just ask Him. He is kind and good and humble and He loves you very much; anything less comes from the liar/deciver satan...
You want your phone ringing and a man who loves you, loves you, loves you and who will be there for you and for your children; someone who speaks the truth in love...because He is guided by the Holy Spirit in truth and in love not by the world and satan.
Realizing how special you are and that you are the apple of Gods eye is a step in the right direction. His grace is free; Jesus Christ paid for it all at the cross...All of us have sinned and fallen short of the glory of God; we repent; tell God we are sorry for our sins and turn away from sin with His help and we beleive in our hearts that Jesus died on the cross for our sins and God rose him again three days later. I pray Father in Jesus name that you convict your precious daughter's heart in the name of Jesus Christ.
Jesus will never leave you nor forsake you; talk to Him; He is knocking now; ask him to get you to the church He wants you to go to.
God puts before us blessings or cursings and we choose; He wants you to choose blessings.
Chased after nothing for years and got nothing...
Sista C
2007-03-12 18:01:37 · answer #1 · answered by sista c 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Look, you are wasting your time. He likes stringing you along, just so he can dramatically break up with you, as you said, he likes drama. Drop him. Cold turkey...drop him. If he comes around, or calls, be civil, but don't agree to see him, and don't call him back. He is trying to break up with you, so let him. Go ahead and move on, tell him you think that moving on is the best idea for the both of you and you agree with him, that he should do some growing up. Then drop him. One of two things will happen, either he will be gone from your life, (which may be a good thing) or he will discover that you don't want to play the reindeer games and come to his senses and realize that he is really losing you and that this is no game. Stop seeing him, don't call, drop him and move on, that is apparently what he wants, so give it to him. You will be much, much happier without the drama king. Hang in there, you can do this.
2007-03-12 23:52:39 · answer #2 · answered by teacupn 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I agree with the first three persons but I know what you mean. There's going to be a time where you'll realize it's time to let go because you deserve so much better. I don't know if you've broke up already but you have to tell him either he grows up or you're moving on. Getting out and meeting new people(don't expect), positive talk, and wanting the best for you and your heart will mend that pain away.
2007-03-12 23:54:02 · answer #3 · answered by LT 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Honey not to sound mean but he just isn't that in to you... If he was you would be together point blank. I suggest what I like to call me time. You seem like you may be young so I don't know about a girls trip. Me and friends do Vegas. If not treat yourself to a spa day maybe lunch with your girlfriends some wine a hot bath and just reflect ! Think of all the things you can do now that you don't have to report in. I know it seems hard now but if you don't call him and do as I say I promise in five days it will be better in five more almost silly and so on and so one and the next guy gets better too!!!! ;o) SMILE
2007-03-12 23:49:23 · answer #4 · answered by Diva Dee 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's hard. The thing is, it's not actually possible for you to wish it all to go away. You have to work through it. I still struggle with it every day, and I broke up with this girl about 2 months ago. There is no quick fix. You just have to search for a way that will help you relieve that pain, and it will go away on it's own.
2007-03-12 23:48:17 · answer #5 · answered by Only 1 Star 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm sorry but my suggestion is walk away. Delete him from your phone, facebook, myspace, aim, etc. Hearts are hard to mend and it has to start with crying, chocolate, and time to yourself. Focus on your girlfriends and try to ignore him. It is going to hurt. I broke up with my love over a year ago and have a new boy in my life, but I still get heart pangs over my ex every once in awhile. No matter how much it hurts, DONT GO BACK TO HIM!!! It only makes it hurt again and take longer to heal, when you already know the bad outcome when you start up again.
Good luck!!
2007-03-12 23:46:41 · answer #6 · answered by kodiackgazer 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
im in the same boat. mine on the other hand needs to get his life straightened out. and i told him i would wait. it could be that he doesnt want you to wait because it would make him feel bad knopwing tht someone is waiting for him. i would just be open and talk tjo him tell him how you feel. i have days when i dont htink that he wants me. its really hard waithing thoughts go through your head but if you feel he is the right person adn he is being honest and truly cares then i would just wait it out and see what happens. but dont wait forever either. my best advice which is what im doing though is to tak to him as much as you can and let your feelings know. but you also have to realize if he says no then he says no. and then just take one day at a time. try and keep yourself occupied. it will hurt but it will also get easier and easier as the days go by. good luck.
2007-03-12 23:51:05 · answer #7 · answered by sunshine24 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I know how you feel.
guys are terribly confusing and can never make up their minds.
you really just have to think about what you want and whats best for YOU.
If he doesn't care enough to give you a straight answer then he's not worth the time.
It's harder to live with pain of regret, or not being able to say how you feel.
The best advice i can give, is to be completly honest with him, and tell him everything how you feel about him.
Don't beat around the bush - do this for yourself, not for anyone else.
be strong, and best of luck.
2007-03-12 23:47:51 · answer #8 · answered by Jenny** 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Oh my! First off, I'm sorry, I know it hurts and occupies 99% of your thinking. He could slay your family and you would still care for him. A crazy little thing called love.This is only a partial answer but its guaranteed...TIME. I wish I could say weeks but months is probably more realistic. You will wonder why you could only think about such a selfish dunce and not all these other fishies in the sea.
2007-03-12 23:53:43 · answer #9 · answered by likinloins 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Oh believe me in a year or two you won't even consider this person the love of your life anymore, not to downplay your feelings, it's just people go through certain phases of their life as they grow older, and find another person and realize wow that wasn't really "love". It will take time, but it'll be okay!
2007-03-12 23:46:44 · answer #10 · answered by Vegas 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋