I got married by arranged marriage at the age of 45. I am O.K. & feel God does not take same work from everybody. I have different kind of work to do. Opening schools, orphanage & As inaugerating this inaugerating that. Arranging parties for neices & nephews graduations. Getting just their love not hate. I feel I am equally blessed as my other sisters or any other women of the world. but my husband says midiocors care for the scoiety not inteligent people. Am I wrong if I did not find my own match & got married at average marriage age of the girls.
Or I would have been happy women if i had child?
2007-03-12 16:11:15 · 46 answers · asked by Nancy 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
YES
2007-03-12 16:12:57 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 5⤋
No dont feel bad. Just cause you didnt find a man you liked and had to have an arranged marriage is not bad at all. Hey at least you can say that you HAVE a man. Not all women even have that. You did get married! So be happy if he is a nice man! Many women would love to be you right now, being married and having a man for the rest of your life. You could always ask your husband if he would want to adopt a child. Whatever nationality you are you may be able to adopt a child that looks just like the two of you. Or you could adopt an older child and they would be your child from them on.
2007-03-12 18:32:52 · answer #2 · answered by Educated 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
U are not mediocre by any means. U r doing productive work for an extended family. U have so many people to call ur own. Why do u want to go thru pain to have ur biological child. In case u r fit enough and u really want a child of ur own then go ahead and have one. But happiness does not come from family members or material things beyond a certain point. U ought to be happy with ur work. So far as ur husband is concerned, I think he is suffering from an inferiority complex and that is why he makes such comments. U have to do a bit of introspection to ensure that u r not having low thoughts about urself as thoughts embedded in our sub-conscious mind manifest in life in the form of events. Give auto suggestions to urself that u are fortunate, happy and bright person and God loves u. Further for ur husband I would suggest that u start praising little things about him say his looks, way of dressing or eating, his taste in reading, roaming around, command in language. Even if he has none of the qualities, tell him that he is a person of golden heart and u r happy to have him as ur companion. Even if he does stupid things, just ignore him and say that he is very good person in such a way that he can hear behind the shoulder say u r talking to ur friend on telephone and he is in another room. Now u r married so for ur own happiness u have to make it a success. Praise is a very strong weapon in ur hand and u will definitely succeed in changing life to ur advantage. This way he will also get over his critisizing habits. Keep him involved in happy conversation.
2007-03-12 22:33:08 · answer #3 · answered by sudershan Guddy 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should be happy with what you have and where you are. You cannot change the past and looking back and wondering if you made a wrong choice at this point in time is not only fruitless but could cause you to be dissatisfied with your current situation which you say you are perfectly happy with. From what you have said it sounds like you have had a pretty full life without children of your own which is a decision that a lot of people make or have made for them. Be happy as you are and move on from there.
2007-03-12 16:17:34 · answer #4 · answered by mental 3 · 4⤊ 0⤋
Jyothi, I totally agree with u..God doesnot take same work from every1. Infact i feel u are God's Choosen One since u are doing so much good work for the society.
U are way above those people who have money but donot care enough for others!
..and dont worry about ur husbands comments. I am sure he will realise what a blessed person he is by having u as his wife.
I just wish u all the best and please never ever feel small or let down for the work you do since u are not doing it for anyone but only for God and he will Reward u in his beautiful and wonderful ways!
2007-03-12 16:33:28 · answer #5 · answered by Asma A 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Happiness doesn't mean the same to everyone. To your husband it could mean marriage at a younger age and children. You can find the same, may be more, in others' happiness or in meaningful social work. Tell your husband that some of the most intelligent and successful people care for society e.g. Bill Gates. Mediocres care for themselves only. I also suppose that your husband is none too young himself. Can he explain why he couldn't achieve his idea of happiness viz. early marriage and kids, at a much younger age?
2007-03-17 06:15:15 · answer #6 · answered by Modest 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is all how do you feel about it. Do you think Gandhiji was a midiocor. It is only your hus's opinion. What about Mother Theresa? What is right and what is wrong ? What majority of people think right is what we call it right. For eg. American government think it is okay to assassinate the leader of another country and the public support it . But what about Indian gov. or its people. You are never wrong for being married late or didn't have kids. But I can say that your husband is wrong in making you think that you are wrong.
You said it,you feel you are equally blessed as any other women in the world and that is it' you are equally blessed as any other women in the world'
2007-03-12 16:50:41 · answer #7 · answered by sayeep 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
yaar first of all I want to say that you r doing the best thing in this world
second if u know that u are equally blessed as other sister or any other women of the world than just do what you r doing
and say your husband that one intelligent person is enough in your house and let m a mediocre so that bal is maintained
give happiness and love to other is not the losers work
so BEST OF LUCK
FORM YOUR FRIEND
AND YOU R A WINNERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!!!
2007-03-15 04:11:29 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
jyoti who says the one who dont get married or get married at 45 age is an losser or child can only make women proud mother please ur n succefull women i believe so u have to be happy for ur self n dont bothed about what other says dear
u have done what u feel ur so lucky some girls r been got marreid so soon before they could even understand what marreige is they get one baby in their arms always live like n working machine then to dont get any respect not from children nor from hubby they live their life in total depression there is no one understand thier prob or to help them
ur having much better life then those women
please tell ur hubby as husband he is suppose to encourage u like how a wife should supportive to her hubby
hubby must have to be supportive to their wife to
god bless you
2007-03-12 21:04:00 · answer #9 · answered by shabana o 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well it not to late for children. Just have to wait and see. But the Bible say He that find a wife find a good thing. So we as women should not look for our husband but let him find us. So I am not sure about arrange marriage. I just hope you get to know that you love your husband not just settling with him because he was chosen for you by someone else. And if there is no love than you need to run now.
2007-03-12 16:20:11 · answer #10 · answered by kool aid 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Its perfect.. you got married when u got the right person in life.. peopls spend their whole life to search that person.. who will make them happy.
In ur case uve already done so much work that now u can just b happy with ur marriage and start a new life. Wish u luck..
2007-03-14 20:59:07 · answer #11 · answered by Deeps 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋