im working my way through college and my best friend expects me to set up her bridal shower and bachelorette party.. is she being rude. or is this normal? should she offer to help pay... i have NO money as it is.
2007-03-12 15:18:38 · 12 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
ok u guys think we are normal people.. we are white trash.. her mom is deceased.. i dont know the bridesmaids and her dad is on welfare and bf mom is paying for reception so i cant ask too many ppl
2007-03-12 15:32:00 · update #1
ok u guys think we are normal people.. we are white trash.. her mom is deceased.. i dont know the bridesmaids and her dad is on welfare and bf mom is paying for reception so i cant ask too many ppl
2007-03-12 15:34:23 · update #2
im working my way thru COLLEGE im 21
2007-03-12 15:34:54 · update #3
IVE been engaged 2 years but put it off for my education
2007-03-12 15:35:21 · update #4
phantom , she dosnt have a mom! uh but i will make her a t shirt.. im writing that one down
2007-03-12 16:16:07 · update #5
Usually the maid of honor pays (often with the help of the other bridesmaids)
customweddingsolutions.com has a really helpful list of who does what. Check out their attendant duties article. Its on their article and guides page.
2007-03-12 15:23:05 · answer #1 · answered by Mommy-of-Twins 4 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Well as far as a shower goes, usually someone else throws her one of those (aunts, in-laws, something like that) but if she doesn't have any of those, you basically just find a place to have it. Get the list of people from her mom and buy a pack of invitations from hallmark. So if you have 30 people to invite, that would be $12 in postage and $6 for a pack of invites. Put on the invite that it's potluck and RSVP to let you know if they are coming and what they are bringing.
But usually the maid of honor does do the bachelorette party. HOWEVER there are tons of ideas that you can do that dont cost much money. For example, my bridesmaids were all rather broke. We went out to a bar and they each bought one drink--but other people kept sending us a round. We all went out to eat at a place that had buy one get one free appetizers and on about $10/person we split about 10 different appetizers. Cost them each less than $15.
My lil cousin is not a big drinker nor a partyer, so for her we are all having a pj party. Renting a bunch of sappy chick flick movies, popping popcorn, and mixing a blender of margaritas but mostly just snacking down on popcorn, chocolate, and candy.
I don't know how adventurous you guys are but my husband and his best man decided they would go camping. It was about $8 each for campsite and I think they spent about $10 each on beer. Or you could just take a day of relaxation at the beach.
There is a lot you can do for free or near free. Just look around. A lot of places offer a Performances in the Park series where they have local bands perform. Just look in whatever your local independent paper is.
If you want to do a liquor party assign each bridesmaid to bring a 1/5. Then you spend maybe $20 in mixers and have it at your house. Plan a scavenger hunt where she has to find people at this local college and get her picture taken to prove she "found" all the items. You said you are white trash--perhaps incorporate that into the hunt. Find a car with no tires on it. Get your picture taken with someone with a mullet. Whatever.
Basically maid of honor has to plan it. For the most part it involves planning if you are going out who is the DD, where you are going, who is in charge of the camera, and researching ways to embarrass the bride (if she's the type that wouldnt get pissed off about it) Like this:
http://www.oz.net/~angiebb/fun/bachparty.htm
http://www.101bachelorettepartytips.com/
http://www.bachelorettepartyideas.net/
Don't forget to make her a tshirt. Grab an old tank top and some paint and make her a giant BRIDE TO BE or SOON TO BE MRS JORDAN.
Being the maid of honor is about planning and organization. She's planning an entire wedding. You just have to plan a small party. It doesn't have to be a $300/person w/e getaway to Vegas or a spa resort. Creativity matters a lot. Think of your friend and figure out something that you guys would all enjoy doing. She knows you guys aren't loaded but you are her friends. Enjoy just being together and being silly together.
2007-03-12 16:08:15 · answer #2 · answered by phantom_of_valkyrie 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋
It's normal for the maid of honor to help organize the bachelorette party and bridal shower. However, I don't think it is necessary for you to pay for each on your own....in fact I think that is a lot to ask. A lot of the time the other girls in the bridal party can chip in to help. Also aske the mother of the bride if she would be willing to help out.
2007-03-12 15:26:34 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
The maid of honor is resposibile for "coordinating" both events, and she and the bridesmaids are supposed to split the cost of the shower.
Get together with the other bridesmaids and come up with a realistic budget. Find ways to cut back... Host it at someone's house. Have each bridesmaid make a dish. Print your own invitations at home. You can still have a very nice shower for her on a very small budget.
2007-03-12 15:25:49 · answer #4 · answered by NoTurningBackNow 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
No, she doesn't pay. However, a shower isn't expensive to throw - just have it at someone's home, everyone contribute snackies and desserts, play a few games and open gifts.
Not everyone has a bachelorette party, so maybe just skip that one. If the girls want to get together informally, they can do that.
Where I'm from, family throws the shower - I understand she doesn't have a mom, but there should be aunties, her future MIL, etc.
2007-03-13 00:32:32 · answer #5 · answered by Lydia 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
When i organised my friends i didn't have any money either. So i organised a party and asked people to help pay for it. Instead of bringing anything i asked people (nicely on the invitation) to donate $10 per person. This went towards food, drink, decorations and games. What ever was left went towards the stripper.. no body complained and was happy that i set it up.. all they had to do was show up with 10 bucks
2007-03-12 15:27:46 · answer #6 · answered by Angel 6 · 3⤊ 0⤋
I'm actually shocked with all the responses saying you are responsible to pay for all that; I guess I didn't expect my maid of honor do all that; she did have a nice shower for me at her apartment; but as far as a bachlorette party; we all went out on the town and we all paid for drinks and split the taxi......
2007-03-12 15:37:44 · answer #7 · answered by abc 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The Maid of honor should gather all bride's maids and split the bill. The bride should not pay!!
2007-03-12 15:26:03 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yes you are suppose to pay but, you can split the cost with a co-host or two.I know brides who have family who sometimes want to throw the shower make sure no one else is interested before doing it all on your own. Just make sure she gets something my MOH didn't know it was her responsibility because her mom had thrown hers and I ended up without one because my mom and sister felt it was tacky to throw one for me.
2007-03-12 15:25:43 · answer #9 · answered by emmandal 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
you organize the shower and get hostesses such as friends and family that help share the cost sometimes the bride will kick in depending what kind of person she is, but brides maids should help with the cost you may need to call ameeting and ask for volunteers to help as for the bachellorette party thats probably up to you just go low scale but tasteful, explain to bride and family and friends your willing to do your share but you can't afford it all on your own if they have any ettiquite they will understand and help. i helped with mine so did my mom and sister
2007-03-12 15:32:01 · answer #10 · answered by Ronni 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋