When I was about 15 I was getting into trouble, mostly with boys. I was having sex and I had about 5 partners. I was brought up kind of strict. Well one night I had two friends stay over. We decided to call our guy friends and see what was up. Well those guys decided to show up at my house late that night. When they did my ex boyfriend came and was trying to get back with me. We ended up having sex in my room while my parents were asleep. While me and my bf were doing that my friend and this guy came in and started doing the same on the floor. My boyfriend ended up staying the night(which he had done before without my parents knowing) and needless to say we got caught having sex on my closet floor by my mother. She just closed the door and I ran away. I came back later that day and she hit me and my dad wouldnt talk to me. After that I went to stay with my sister for a few days. I went home eventually and my mom asked me a lot of selfish questions.
Dont answer yet Im adding more!!!
2007-03-12 14:54:59 · 21 answers · asked by Princess Rach 3 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Parenting
Her questions were "what is everybody going to think?" and "how am I supposed to feel?" and "what kind of mother does this make me look like?" Never once did she ask me how I felt, or ask me why I did this, or if I was okay. At the time I probably didnt want her to, but why didnt she ask? After she asked me all these questions she knew exactly how many guys I had been with and never took me to the doctor. She just went back to her normal life and we never spoke of it again. I got pregnant a few years later and now I feel a little more complete when I hold my son. I dont know why my mother felt the way she did, but I know that when my child is going through something like that HE will be my only concern. He always is. This was 7 years ago and I still dont know what to think. Maybe one day me and mom will talk about it and she'll be able to forgive me, I dont know. Maybe she has.
2007-03-12 15:02:45 · update #1
Im 22 now. No longer living at home and I have my own family to take care of. I guess my point is that im trying to ask how could parents ignore such obvious problems that their children are having?
2007-03-12 15:08:13 · update #2
What about what you were doing to them? What about the fact you were lying, sneaking people into their home, and disrespecting them. Granted you treated yourself like trash, but what do you think they should've done? Too many people in too many posts refuse to own up to what they did and instead blame somebody else.
Now you have your child and you feel complete. How quaint, this was never about them it was always about you. Nowhere in your little speach did you mention what you did other than screw the neighborhood. Why didn't you talk to your mother? Hopefully you'll be able to raise your child to know better than to screw everyone he meets, but just remember it was ok when you did it.
"I know a fourteen year old who was raped by her uncle.": being raped and inviting your boyfriend over for sex are two totally different things. You cannot compare the two.
""dont listen to these ppl they arnt being serious!!" -- yes I am being very serious.
2007-03-12 15:32:31 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 4⤋
dont listen to these ppl they arnt being serious!!
I think first off, if your not on birth control, thats one thing you might want to get. Its not that your mom is being selfish its that she cares for you. I know how she feels because I have 2 kids of my own.
I'm not sure how old you are but your probably reallly young.If your not careful one of 2 things will happen, you will end up with a disease or you will end up preg. Neither of them are good when your young. I am 21 yrs old with 2 kids and its not easy. Those kids depend on you all the time. Once you have kids you really cant do anything, then the friends that you thought were friends will stop comming around. You might wonder why your parents dont have many friends its because you depended on them and they chose you over them.
I was raised by my father who is a christian and was VERY strict, even then it dont mean your gonna grow up like they want you to. People warned me all the time if I kept doing the bad things, worse things are going to happen, and I did NOT listen I thought it was all bull.... well they all happened. I had kids young and I was not ready for them, I cant go out, I wish I had lietened to my dad and everyone else cause even though you think they are wrong, THEY ARE RIGHT!! Just do this one thing I'm not going to tell you what everyone else had told me, but think about what your doing and the consequences, because they are real!!
2007-03-12 22:19:36 · answer #2 · answered by Amber F. 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Some parents think that once they know what you are doing they know why you are doing it. If it is still bothering you talk to her about it but do not expect an apology or for her to have the impression that she has done anything wrong. They way she was raised you had to know what your kid is up to and if it didn't fit into the norm you had to put a stop to it, no one ever asked why. Also keep in mind that no matter what happens you have your own family now and it is more important to look to the future than to dwell in the past.
2007-03-12 22:20:42 · answer #3 · answered by 2sweet 1 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Well, I think there is a huge connection between the fact that you were a child acting like an unpaid prostitute and that your mother was a narcissistic ***** goddess.
Clearly, no healthy, happy teenager acts like you did and you had to have been quite messed up by your mother before then. I'm sure you want your son to treat himself and young girls with much more respect than you and your pals treated yourselves.
It's excruciating being in relationships with narcissists. I'm glad you survived and thrived. Don't ever expect her to see things from your point of view, because she only has the capacity to see her own.
2007-03-12 22:10:25 · answer #4 · answered by cassandra 6 · 3⤊ 1⤋
ok im not sure how to
i had a mother like yours
when i was 10 y/o's old my step dad was attempting to molest me and my mom walked in and caught him and she yelled at me and accused me of trying to steal her husband and kicked me out of there house
thank god i went to live with my dad
if will never beable to understand why your mother is who she is or why she is the way she is you have better things to do with your time you have a lil one that needs you now
just be a better mother than she was and you will be fine
if you need an ear im here for you
2007-03-12 23:49:30 · answer #5 · answered by debrasearch 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe it's just that she didn't quite know what to do or say. Most parents do not even know how to explain where babies come from to their children, even less deal with something like this.
Maybe you should talk to her now? Ask about it? Seems like you could use some clousure
2007-03-12 22:05:32 · answer #6 · answered by Edith 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
" Whats wrong with this horrible picture?"
This is all that I needed to read:
"When I was about 15 I was getting into trouble, mostly with boys. I was having sex and I had about 5 partners. "
Rebellion is not the answer!!!! Have some self dignity girl!
2007-03-12 21:58:42 · answer #7 · answered by azdaizey 2 · 7⤊ 1⤋
You were selfish by doing all this behind your parents' back, why isn't your mom allowed to ask "selfish" questions? If you expect perfection from your parents I guarantee you'll be disappointed.
2007-03-12 22:28:56 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
What problems are you talking about? You had self induced problems. Kids dont have sex because they are depressed, they do it cause they want to be cool or be mature or stick it to their parents. You are the selfish one because you threw 14 years of good parenting down the shitter when you decided you couldnt keep your pants zipped.
2007-03-12 22:27:41 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 3⤋
Tell me about it. I know a fourteen year old who was raped by her uncle. And then was blamed for it by her parents. Till this day they have ignored this topic. shes now 31.
2007-03-12 22:32:11 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 2⤋