My story goes like this I love my husband so so much! He is deployed in korea. We have been married for 6 years. He ask me for a divorce? Why I don't know! I am not going to give him a divorce! I love him! He has only being gone for 2 months! He said they don't get r&r in korea? He has being deployed 3 times in our marriage. What can I do? I can't go over there? We are seperate through deployment only? Can he do did and get away with this? If so what am I entitle too? I haven't work in the six years? Just part time jobs? Would it be in the case cheaper to keep me! I don't know why he is doing this we have 1 daughter together she is his only baby? He said he is not happy? I never saw the signs of him not being happy???
Please help me I am hurting badly! I am scared it is going to bring bitterness in my heart! I don't want no divorce I Love him!!!!!!!!
2007-03-12 13:41:33 · 17 answers · asked by God's chosen 3 in Politics & Government ➔ Military
oh he is a e-5! cheating i don't think he just acting strange cause he is tired of being deployed! He been in almost 10 years! I don't know what to say and he is showing no one bit of emotions! He knows I am a faithful wife and a christian wife? Please help me!
2007-03-12 13:43:27 · update #1
do u get r&r in korea!
2007-03-12 13:58:28 · update #2
What goes on in korea?
2007-03-12 14:18:12 · update #3
First of all, Calm Down. Think. Do you talk like this to your husband every time you guys ever talk to each other?
Anyway, POSSIBLY speaking, he might be wanting to divorce you because he feels that he wants you to get married with some other guy and live happily ever after.
Maybe he might want to get some attention from you.
I'm very sure there was something in the past that led to his decision. Maybe untangling that complexity might loosen him a bit. I don't know. It's up to you.
2007-03-12 13:49:58 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
As someone who has been to Korea...twice, and I am getting ready to go back again, because I am single...I can tell you, that he is probably cheating on you. He probably found himself a Juicy girl (Filipina Bar Girl, hired by a Korean bar owner).
Most married guys go to Korea for a year, thinking they are single again, and forget about the troubles back home. This results in them wanting a divorce. I've seen it happen many times. I've also seen it happen the opposite way, where a guy goes back to the states on his mid-tour and his wife has been cheating and wants a divorce.
If you really want to get him in trouble, go see the First Sergeant, or the the legal office. If I recall, it's against the UCMJ to comit adultry. Make his life hell. Also, If I recall, depending on how long you have been married...I think it's 10 years...you can take half his retirement.
Me? I'm single, so I can chase skirts all I want.
2007-03-12 21:40:12 · answer #2 · answered by USAF, Retired 6 · 3⤊ 0⤋
I understand your situation. My husband was recently in korea and is now in iraq and has asked for a divorce also. The pain is unreal. I have two boys who are suffering also.
Yes they do get 30 days mid tour leave.
I have been doing alot of reading lately and i suggest a book by Michele Weiner-Davis Divorce busting just give it a try i am still trying it real hard from long distance and i know there is someone else involved in my situation he met her while at bnoc in kentucky. I wish you the best of luck we all need to work to keep the families of the soldiers in tact for our children. God bless you
2007-03-12 23:14:42 · answer #3 · answered by chell 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
my husband is stationed in korea also. they can get r&r...
what didnt you go with him to korea? he would have to stay one more year but it could be a great experience. i would have loved to go there with our 2 kids...and i am not command sponsored. we made everything ready for me comming to korea and around 3 weeks before i wanted to come my husband was told his unit is getting deployed to iraq..and now he wants me to stay in germany until he is back from iraq. i couldnt believe it. i was so sad, i couldnt eat, talk or even think. i havent seen him since 11 months now and we dont know when we are together again...but i trust him. i have absolutely no doubts...
..what he is telling me about the night life....if you want to cheat, it is very easy. he is saying all these korean bar girls are just waiting for us soldiers. he also told me that they have to be back at the barracks at 1 in the morning on the weekends...
..why you not going there to visit him instead of him comming home, so you could have a picture in your mind....
..good luck and dont give up
2007-03-13 05:08:34 · answer #4 · answered by panny 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Two things are possibly going on here.
It could be you and him spent so much time about due to his job, that the physical distance created emotional distance also. This has happened to me with close relatives and others I was close to. This may be the case with you and your husband.
The other question is do you know anything about the night life in Korea availiable to American soldiers?
2007-03-12 21:05:46 · answer #5 · answered by gotagetaweigh 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
My heart and prayers goes out to you.
Delay any decision until he gets home, and then urge him to seek Christian marital counseling with you.
There's more to this story - many complex reasons why people grow apart. The separation of military deployment places enormous stress on a relationship even under the best of circumstances. You each need to talk about your deeper feelings and expectations.
--
Re/Korea. Yes, prostitution is endemic near U.S. bases in Korea - this is hardly unique to that country! While he may have to ask forgiveness in this area - and you may need to extend it - it may more likely be a symptom rather than a cause of deeper issues in your relationship.
2007-03-12 20:49:35 · answer #6 · answered by Mark P 5 · 3⤊ 1⤋
You need to go to the Discussion Boards on www.military.com, do a search on Korea, and educate yourself on what exactly goes on over there. Then and only then can you make a decision on what to do.
I will only say this - Korea is one of the worst duty stations for a married soldier who has any thought of cheating. Well, "worst" for you - not for him.
And after you have educated yourself, you will hate your yahoo screen name.
You have my sympathy.
2007-03-12 21:01:02 · answer #7 · answered by retired military wife 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
you had to see this coming. divorce doenst just suddenly arise. there are problems and circumstances behind it. get into counseling through the military/ and get in contact with his command and tell them he filed for divorce they will find out why from him. you will be entitled to his pay for you and the baby until the divorce (only a percent of it though.) is final. is he cheating. something is going on . you are either refusing to accept it or ignoring it. deployments dont bring divorce in happily married people. you need to talk to him and find out why.
2007-03-12 22:23:39 · answer #8 · answered by kleighs mommy 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
OK......He is cheating on you with bar girls in Korea. They always want amelican GI go to land of big PX have big money open nail salon on GI money divorce GI get mo money. Go eat kimshi have good breath...... blow breath on rich amelican lady......she have beautiful nails... smell like good korean food....rich lady go home....husband smell pretty lady..puke .....tell wife take sit bath or see doctor tomorrow.....you smell same same bargirl x-wife
2007-03-12 21:02:27 · answer #9 · answered by PHILLIP W 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Sorry that you are going through this.
Visit the following link for some advice from other military spouses.
2007-03-13 01:18:23 · answer #10 · answered by TT 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋