my fiances brother is getting married and my fiance is best man but i cant stand the woman he marrying and i gotta spend all day with them she hates me and vice versa cos my fiance was her best mate i she didnt want him in a relationship she wanted him all to herself i know she has slept around behind his back loads of times he just so blind and cant see owt wrong but no one in the family knows what do i do
2007-03-12 13:23:05 · 17 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
buttttttttttt she has a think for my fiance before we got together she slept with him and she doesnt know i know even at our engagement she was flirting with him and she knows i hate her i would kill her thou if i hit her my fiance knows this as he told me as he wont keep anything away from me all the family know we dont get on already at there previous partys she just made b line for my fiance
2007-03-12 13:46:16 · update #1
im far from a nasty person but she gets my hair on my back up baddddddddd
2007-03-12 13:47:00 · update #2
oh and he sat with her for meal im sat elsewhere with my sons he has to be on top table the closer it gets my blood boiling cos she be sat there laughing at me knowing i want to hit her and she knows i wont
2007-03-12 14:05:22 · update #3
Mandy, I can hear where you are coming from, and understand that it can't be easy for you considering what has happened in the past.
I personally think you do have to attend this event, even if its for the sake of your fiance... I doubt you and this woman will be around each of much on the day, and just try to keep your distance from her.... its only one day, as hard as it maybe...
Does your fiance know how you are feeling over this situation? Perhaps, airing your thoughts to hI'm may help you, and im sure he will be there to support you...
Please don't make a scene on anything with the run up to the wedding or on the day, it will just cause problems amongst the family, and they will resent you for it....
What are the sitting arrangements? Consider whether you have a guest pass, so maybe if you fiance is on the head table, you could bring a friend, and have a laugh together... it may help the day go a bit quicker....
...It will be your big day soon enough... just keep quiet for now, it will be over before you know it....
2007-03-12 20:02:37 · answer #1 · answered by ஐ♥PinkBoo - TTC #1♥ஐ 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First things first, about the information of cheating that you know, keep it to yourself. You are not in a position to tell this man or his family, you will just be seen as a trouble maker and thats not the way you want these people, who will soon be your family, to look at you. So keep quiet about this info.
Second, attend the wedding, but you dont have to do all the activities that go along with the wedding. It would be nice if she had a shower to attend that and also the rehearsal dinner, out of respect for your fiance's family and for your fiance, but as for bachelorette parties and any other things that they invite you to (by day of I am assuming you mean hair & nail appts, getting her dressed etc) decline politely that you wont be attending these and show up when you are actually needed, like for pictures before the ceremony. There is no need for you to have to be there at any point before that, so best to stay away.
Honestly, she wont pay you any mind once things get rolling, so you dont have to worry about her getting in your face or anything after she walks down the aisle, she will be in her own world by then and you probably wont even cross her mind.
Good luck and stay cool!
2007-03-12 13:36:52 · answer #2 · answered by kateqd30 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Even though you may not like that woman and you may know how nasty she is, you arent going to the wedding for her- you are going for your fiance- as his date, his supporter. You have to be the bigger woman and suck it up now.
Just be polite for the few minutes, smile and make your time around her brief. Dont let on to anyone that you know what type of a person she is- that is up the her husband to find out on his own.
There will be more people than not at the wedding and I am sure she wont be playing a hater that day- there will be just too many other things to worry about.
2007-03-12 13:35:22 · answer #3 · answered by glorymomof3 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I reckon you should forget how much animosity there is between you and just have a decent day!! It is gonna be hard but thats life, cos if you dont then it will spoil things for your brother-in-law and your partner!! As for sitting apart for the meal, you will have to accept that as this is the norm at all weddings, besides your children need you with them. Keep your distance from her and try to enjoy your day as much as they will, otherwise the only person that is gonna be miserable is you!! Good Luck
2007-03-12 16:53:06 · answer #4 · answered by Jaksi 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you don't do anything. It's your fiance's brother's wedding and he is going to marry whom ever he wants to marry. If you don't like her, don't talk to her outside family functions. When you do see her, be civil.
If she's sleeping around then that's your brother-in-laws problem and not for you to address. If she has a thing for you're fiance, I won't worry b/c eventually the truth will come out. He asked you to marry him, so obviously he wants to be with you and not her.
Just stays out of your brother-in-laws and new sister-in-laws life, it's not for you to address their personal problem. If you stick your nose where it doesn't belong, you could end up looking like the bad guy. Do you want to be the busy-body in the family before you even get married. Do you want bad blood between your in-laws?
Mind your own business.
2007-03-12 13:37:34 · answer #5 · answered by Answer Girl 2007 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you must go, go to be your fiance's guest and nothing else, stay out of the way, and lay low. Weddings are always chaos for the bride, and chances are if you want to stay out of the way and go unnoticed you will be able to get away with it. As far as the cheating thing goes, chances are if there is bad blood between you and the bride, anything you say to warn the groom of her bad behavior is going to go unheard. Let it go, and lay low, there isn't much else you can do.
2007-03-12 13:34:19 · answer #6 · answered by Irish 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You'll hardly spend time with her!! Seriously, it's a wedding, she will have to mingle with all the guests, just as you will talk to family and friends. Just be polite for your 10 minute slot and it'll go fine. If she really is that bad, just support your brother in law when it all goes Pete Tong!
2007-03-12 13:28:05 · answer #7 · answered by Cliff E 5 · 4⤊ 0⤋
sit really really far away from her, after the wedding stay away from her as much as possible. make sure your fiance understands that it's innappropriate for hima dn her to 'hang out' together alone and try to have minimal contact with her.
Good luck...
2007-03-12 14:00:03 · answer #8 · answered by Ashley 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just show that you are the better woman, take a deep breath and try not to drink too much, do exactly what she would hate, be charming.
2007-03-12 20:39:33 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
mandy,go to the wedding and bring a girlfriend with you so you do not lose control..it may be all day, but you are not marrying her..let him get married and he will find out later about her..it may be a quick divorce if he is not looking..my son went thru the same suitation and the marriage lasted week.be happy and true to the one that you are with...stay cool, and always smile..therefore you cannot get mad..good luck
2007-03-12 13:33:04 · answer #10 · answered by Ronald B 1 · 1⤊ 2⤋