4 yr. old. daughter still NOT potty trained!!! HELP!!!?

Question

My daughter turned 4 September of 06'. I don't know what to do anymore. She has a bit of trouble speaking. I brought this up to her doctor, who said it was probably because she was an only child and didn't have any other children her age to talk to and develope speech with. She understands potty, peepee, poop in the potty. But she can't say "mom, i have to go potty". Her speech isn't all there for complete sentences. I think because she can't say it, it's easier for her to just go in the diaper. I tried the pull ups but it is the same thing she won't tell me i have to go. I tried bribing her with candy. I tried putting her in the bathroom until she went- or lack of going. I work fulltime so i am not there with her all day. i try on weekends, but what good is that when i go to work on Monday and she forgets? Her grandma babysits for me, but she isn't much help in the potty training side. Shes one of those "she'll go when she goes" person. But i'm really really concerned! HELP!!

Answer 1

If there's nothing wrong with your daughter (she's physically and mentally healthy) then I say get her around other kids!!! If she sees other kids her age using the toilet rather than pull ups then she'll probably catch on quickly. If she isn't around other kids and you've missed that golden window of 18mo-30mo then I don't see your situation improving. She's gotten away with not using the toilet for I'm assuming over a year now.
It sounds like your child DESPRATELY needs time with kids her own age. If she can't speak in full sentences all of the time now, then she isn't getting enough exposure! I was surpised to see how my 27mo old niece spoke in complete sentences (she has a 4 yr old sister and goes to day care) and was potty trained. It makes A HUGE difference when your child is exposed to other children.
At least start her in a play group if not preschool.
You may want to get a different doctor for a second opinion- she may not be healthy.

Answer 2

To be honest it seems a little alarming to me that she can't say a full sentence at four years old. The doctor may be right in that if she had siblings around she would be picking it up faster, but do you and her grandmother talk to her? If you're talking to her, especially using real grown-up language as opposed to baby-talk, then she should be picking up grammar by now. Even if she lacks all the words to put together a complete sentence, "poop" or "pee" or "potty" alone should be enough to get the point across. I have a friend whose child was a bit behind in terms of speaking, and she would say "poop" and that was her signal. She didn't need a whole sentence.

I think it would be a good idea to ask your doctor if you can see a developmental specialist. Children do things at their own times, that's true, but if she's lagging behind in speech then perhaps you can find out some ways to help improve that.

As for the potty training, there could be many reasons why she's having problems. Your concern about only being there on the weekends is a valid one. I think it would be a good idea to have a talk with her grandma about this. After all, she's your child, and you get to make the decisions on how things are done. Just tell her that you're concerned about her not being potty trained, and that you want to try a certain schedule, but that you need to make sure she keeps it all the time. Tell her, for instance, that after lunch (I'd do this after every meal and before bed) you want your daughter to sit on the toilet. Maybe get her a potty book and read it to her. Make sure she gets "yay!" and a hug for trying, and even more of a "yay" if she really goes. It's best to try to keep it fun and not put too much pressure on her. It should be something she can feel good about, as that will help motivate her to want to continue. Having a regular schedule like this should really help.

If you do this for awhile and you're still having problems, then I would definitely go to a doctor with it. If she was my daughter, I would take her to another doctor for a second opinion, or ask for a developmental specialist to do a check on her, too. I'm not trying to be alarming, just honest with my opinion. I hope the best for you and hope that she potty trains soon. :)

Answer 3

Your daughter will go when she is ready. My son whose birthday is July 8 2002, just a couple of months older than your daughter only started going potty about three months ago. There needs to be consistancy though at home and with Grandma. The Pull-ups did not work for any of my four children. I am sure that even with her limited speech that she does understand. Include her in the potty training plan. Ask her what she would like to do and how she would like to do it. I tried to potty train my son since he was two. He is a very strong-willed child and would not do it until he was good and ready and it was his idea. He needed to feel like he was in charge. Try a sticker chart for a few weeks. I agree with Grandma to a point that she will go when she is ready, but a little convincing and input from your daughter about her ideas may help. Save your money on the Pull-Ups because they don't work at all. Underwear work better.

Answer 4

I agree there's a reduce until eventually the youngster is bodily disabled or has some psychological incapacities. i'd sit down as a nuclear relatives, and are available to an settlement on a thanks to attitude the priority of potty preparation her. that's had to to have consistancy at both houses and in any preschool/daycare putting. That on my own can make certain the priority. My guess is the if that's the youngest infant or in undemanding words infant for the mummy, that's allowing her to save the daughter her "infant" and may also be the reason she isn't potty experienced on the prompt. that's style of milestone for human beings and helps the youngster more beneficial independence and some human beings have problem with that. Her medical specialist can actually have some effective assistance to get you the position you want to be with this issue.