Confusion...................?

Question

started receiveing flirty texts from a friend of 3 years(also colleague).id grown fond of him but linda felt gutted when he admitted fancying me but that he didnt want a relationship.knowing this,i spent the night with him coz it felt right and i thought he may reconsider.He didnt though ni never mentioned this.Things werent the same.I felt bitter though it was my fault as he was honest from the start.he text me saying he didnt regret that night and i text saying i did.He was gutted and it caused friction between us for the first time ever.I coulfdnt understand why the reaction coz he didnt want me anyway.Anyhowse, a few mornings ago, he texts me saying that he had a sexy dream about me and i thought he was coming around etc,,,,,,,,,last night i went to see him for a chat coz i was upset.It ended with him admitting he cared for me tbut that it was lust..............Im just fed up .Worse coz he was good friend.I suffer depression and this has just hurt big time.I have no self esteem.

Answer 1

Well sorry but he wont be a good friend anymore, he obviously wants you in a sexual way and not in a relationship. Now its up to you to either accept what he is obviously offering you or move on and look for somebody else. Dont be sad or depressed and if you are its because you really like this guy and it sucks when they dont like or love you back but it happens..
But you know why you regret it because you fell for this guy, but like I said it probably wont be the first or the last. dont get down because of a guy, theres alot more out there. Go out with friends, keep busy and your mind will ease up. I understand you though I went thru a similiar experience and i survived. Keep ypur head up and just smile... ;-)

Answer 2

ur friend is being a true friend to you because he's being honest with you. you should take note and do the same: be honest with urself. you must hold urself to a higher standard, if you know that his feelings are lustful, and you want and deserve more than that, then u owe it to urself to not be put in the same position again.... tell him (and urself) that there wont be any physical stuff between u guys unless he is clear that u are what he wants in more than just a lustful capacity... not to be trite but take it as a learning experience... dont beat urself up about it... create ur own self esteem by telling urself u were smart enough to walk away from a situation that could have been really damaging, then do it...