dont care about spelling or writing...
my cusin and i r having a joke war tomorrow and i know there r jokes already on here but i want new 1's so if anyone has any joke at all just put it here... please nothing to long but long like a paragrph or 2 is fine. short1's r welcome 2 but nuthin too kiddie lyk: what did the candle say to the other candle? will u go out with me....unless its funny.
2007-03-12 10:50:50 · 22 answers · asked by Anonymous in Entertainment & Music ➔ Jokes & Riddles
I made this one up.
Q: Why shouldn't you race a boxer up the stairs?
A: Because he'll beet you up!
http://www.jokeswarehouse.com/links/pages/Top_List_Sites/
This is a useful site too!
Hope you find these sites useful!
2007-03-20 09:00:52 · answer #1 · answered by serioussamp 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
A little boy was turning 2 and his dad asked him what he wanted for his birthday. The boy said "Dad, I want a pink ping pong ball." The dad said, "A what?! No son of mine is EVER going to have ANYTHING PINK!!!" So he got him a tricycle instead. Did the boy like the tricycle? Yes, but he would've rather had a pink ping pong ball. He asked for this every single birthday and Christmas, but his dad would never let him have anything pink.
When the boy was graduating from college, his dad asked him what he wanted for a graduation present. The boy said, "Dad, I REALLY want a pink ping pong ball." But the dad said, "WHAT?! No son of mine is EVER going to have ANYTHING PINK!" So he got him a house instead. Did the boy like the house? Yes, but he would've rather had a pink ping pong ball.
A couple years later, the boy got into a car accident. He was rushed to the hospital, but he wasn't going to make it. His dad came to see him and asked if there was anything he could do for him. The boy asked, "Dad... please... I want a pink ping pong ball..." The dad sighed. "Okay, I'll get it for you. But just tell me: WHY do you want a pink ping pong ball??" And the boy said, "Well... dad... it's because..." and then he died.
THE END.
(You can make it especially painful to endure by going through other birthdays, plus engagement presents, wedding presents, etc, and just substituting a different gift from the dad each time.)
2007-03-20 09:50:29 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Q: Why did the blonde have to drink a hot pepsi?
A: Because she couldn't fit any ice into the bottle.
What did the blonde say when she opened a box of Cheerios? "Oh look, donut seeds."
There was a man outside mowing his lawn. He lived next door to a blonde who had just gotten a computer. She went out to her mailbox to check the mail and went back in. After she had done that 10 times the guy asked her why she kept coming back out side and she said "my computer keeps telling me I have mail".
2007-03-20 09:42:43 · answer #3 · answered by Lucky_Star 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
There were two blondes, and they had just came from a store.
The blonde that owned the mustang had locked her keys in the car. She was trying to pick the lock when she stoped to rest for a second.
When she sat down, her friend said, "Hurry up, it's starting to rain and the top's down!"
knock knock
whos there
you
you who
hi
is this good enough?
2007-03-12 11:19:41 · answer #4 · answered by Fallen Angel 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
A Chinese couple on their wedding night were talking be fore consummating their marriage.
Dear. The man said . I do not want to hurt you, is there anything you want to try ? She thought for a minute or two and said , I would like to try 69 if that is ok with you. He was at a loss not knowing what she would like to do so he kissed her forehead and her nose and asked what you want with Beef Broccoli.
2007-03-20 08:32:54 · answer #5 · answered by Tom R 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
A woman walks in to a pub and shouts:
"if any of you men can guess my weight, il let u take me home and make love to me all night"
A man in the background shouts:
"about 25stone you fat c**t"
The woman replies:
"Grab your coat you lucky fu***r you've pulled"
LMFAO!!!
2007-03-20 04:34:29 · answer #6 · answered by welshlad2303 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
a malaysian man found gravity earlier than newton, sadly, he didnt live to tell it to the world, since he found it by a durian falling on top of his head, and so he sustained severe injuries..... pretty dumb, since malaysia existed only frm 1957.... but i think it probably made you laugh.
2007-03-20 04:52:29 · answer #7 · answered by 5|-|@|\| |_33 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Two television ariels went to church and got married.....The service was terrible but the reception was fantastic....Boom Boom.
2007-03-20 01:47:19 · answer #8 · answered by Jambo 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
ur momma is so old that when she farts she blows out dust
ur momma so stupid that she took a spoon to the super bowl
2007-03-20 10:22:45 · answer #9 · answered by Trey Q 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
why did the second monkey fall out of the tree?
because it was nailed to the first one.
http://www.ahajokes.com/
2007-03-12 11:45:40 · answer #10 · answered by bostonsox16 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋