I moved here on a Friday and his ex died on Sat. His family knew she was a bad mom and wife but got to know and like her over their 15 years. They didn't get to say bye to her or go to the funeral. But here I am in the middle of it all. His sister-in-law apologized for blowong me off in the beginning, she said she liked Shelly. But nobody includes me by calling or inviting me to go along with them when my fiance is at work. Should I just wait it out or what?
2007-03-12 07:09:25 · 7 answers · asked by natsuko1 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
I have tried to be friendly and show them that I care about my fiance and his kids. I painted every room in the house and fixed up a lot of things that needed done. I helped his mom make cookies and cook over Christmas. Am I just expecting too much to want more from them right now?
2007-03-12 07:13:57 · update #1
Maybe the lack of invitations are just the way the family operates...you're still new on the scene. Guys seem to move on in this situation much sooner than females. His family may need more time to adjust, but will probably welcome you after they realize that you make him happy. And it serves no purpose to express negative things about her as she is no threat to you. It also will not comfort him. He and his family are aware of the way things were
2007-03-12 07:14:04 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Give them time.It's only been a few months.
Above all......don't badmouth the ex no matter what they say about her.She is(was) the children's mother after all.
Sounds as though they are beginning to care about you if his sis in law apologized to you and his mom let you help with Christmas and baking etc.
Be friendly and respectful to his family and I'm sure given time they will come around.Why don't you try inviting them for coffee or an outing with you and see what the response is?Maybe they are waiting for you to make the first move toward them. Good Luck.
2007-03-12 07:24:49 · answer #2 · answered by sonnyboy 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Their not suppose to invite you to go with them, they have their lives and you have yours. Couples that are married a day or 15 years don't get invited to go along with in laws when they go somewhere. It would be different if he is invited and you don't get included that might not be exactly right. I'll tell you one thing I wouldn't want my in laws when I was married to ask me to come along all the time or anytime, NO THANK YOU.
2007-03-12 07:18:47 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Give it time. Be friendly, but not pushy about it. Ask your fiance if there is anything particular that you should do or not do to ease the situation. Basically, if you behave well, and give the family a chance, they should gradually accept you.
2007-03-12 07:12:44 · answer #4 · answered by MOM KNOWS EVERYTHING 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are expecting too much. Find friends outside of the family.
2007-03-12 07:22:54 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
technically it's their family affair, all you can really do is just be supportive of you fiance
2007-03-12 07:13:33 · answer #6 · answered by www.japanvideogames.com 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
wait it out let them get over their grief eventually they should come around if not its their loss
2007-03-12 07:13:09 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋