Am I playing games by not answering his calls?

Question

I got really sick last week... firs the FLU... then Brochitis, I was so sick I could barely get out of bed. Wednesday my bf (2yrs) took me to the ER for the second time and stayed with me through the night. I haven't seen him since then. Friday/Saturday he was supposed to go out of town to see family (and call mebefore he left), but I'm not even sure... I got a voicemail telling me he was ther on Saturday though. I haven't spoke to him since Friday and he's been calling/texting since then, but I just don't feel up to talking to him right now. Between Wednesday and now I still haven't seen him and I'm just hurt that he didn't even come by to check on me. We're considering marriage and I'm kind of resistant becuase I don't hink I can handle this kind of neglect in the future. I just really want him to know that I'm not gonna take this kind of BS and when I feel up to talking to him I will, but I'm wondering if this is games.

When he told me (over the phone) on Friday that he had to go home to see family, I was very understanding as usual. But I specifically asked him just to call me before he left so I would know that's on the road and that he's safe, but I didn't get a call until the afternoon saying that he made it. (It's a 5hr drive), I dind't waste my time or energy ansering my phone and let the voicemail pick up. I was just tired. Things like this have happened before. One of my good friends tell me that I need to talk to him and try to understand why he does certain things and figure out some compromises for our future, but it's been 2yrs and I'm so... so... tired. What to do?

I stated getting sick on Monday... and took myself to the ER... he didn't find out I was sick until Wednesday. By Wednesday I could barely even stand to speak. I've text hiim back, but it's basic stuff that he's sending... "Are you ok"..."Why haven't you called"... I'm still sick, trying to recover, just don't have the strength to argue anymore. He know wher I live, he could just as easy get in his care and drive for 10mins to SEE how I'm doing, not text me.

Answer 1

You can't be mad that he didn't check on you -- he did, you just didn't answer the phone.

You are clearly saying "leave me alone", and he is complying. If you want him to come over, pick up when he calls and say so.

Answer 2

ok you wont answer his calls, but you want him to stop and check on you???? ok. I know its really hard to realize reguardless of your current, past or present dilemas in your own life relationships come down to a lot of realization that you have to and I mean HAVE TO learn to love yourself, then realize you have to love to be loved. Realize you have to just put down what is being done for you or proved to you that it is what its said to be and just love and do whatever it is that you would expect to be done for you if someone really loved you then when your doing that and they either done do the same or continue to act that way then the writing will be on the wall as to wether they love you or not. when all that other garbadge is out of the way and theres nothing left to blame it on or confuse you as to what is what then you'll see the answer not until then though. Thats what I had to do, and that was do everything under the sun that he said I wasnt doing or was not right in his mind about my conduct with myself daily and then when he still wasnt satisified and had nothing left to blame his coming and going on and still wanted to leave then I knew he doesnt really love me, and well to say the least atleast I know he isnt or isnt going to do it now the way I want it to be or should be if you really love someone, and maybe just maybe soon or in the future it will be that way, but maybe not. Realizing that helps each day go by alittle bit easier than it would if I was sitting here every day wondering if I should slit my wrist or endure the crap and move on, its like that way I have in my mind that theres a chance still that it might end up that were together happily I can keep doing what i'm saposed to be doing and move on, it gets easier each day and if in the end it doesnt go my way i'll have got myself in a posistion in the mean time to be able to move on without feeling like I cant do it, or its to hard, or I cant do this or that because of that, I dont know try it, good luck Kim

Answer 3

Umm, YES! I believe you are playing a game and I also believe your REALLY mad because he went out of town. I really think that maybe your the one that can't handle the neglect and not him. Everything you are saying about him I can see from you. He didn't stop by but he is calling and texting. What do you want from him?? It seems as if your the one with the problem and that maybe you really don't want to marry him. I think you should really think about this.

Also, try no ignore the ignorance from the people that doesn't have a vocabulary. They use ignorant words to express them self out of stupidity. Here is a number for them 1-800-ABC-DEFG.

Answer 4

Wait a minute. You said he texted you and left you a voice mail. That means he was trying to get in contact with you. So, he tried. Maybe he thinks that since you don't responce you lost interest in him or maybe he is caugh up in something. Maybe he endd up in the hospital or in jail and can't comunicate. hen again, maybe not. You know the phone works both ways. You should call hi to se whats up. Make up some dumb excuse like you disconnected the phone because you wanted to rest and forgot to hook it back up. Then see what he says. Two years is a long time to be playing games you know.

Answer 5

I think you are playing games.. I'm sorry you were so sick.. I hope you're feeling better. You need to tell him how you feel b/c he doesn't know right now.. Maybe he feels like he's the best bf for taking you to the ER... Be honest and then he may be the one for you. You never know..

Good Luck!!

Answer 6

Yeah, girl, you guys are playing games. After two years you should be able to communicate with each other about your feelings and expectations, especially if you are considering marriage. Just talk to him openly and honestly, you will get much more accomplished that way then by ignoring his calls. He doesn't know what you expect, guys are not mind readers and don't like playing games. Good luck and I hope you will feel better soon. :)

Answer 7

What BS? He took you to the ER twice and stayed with you AND he's been calling and texting you! I think you're the one acting up. I understand you're sick but a simple text letting him know you miss him or SOMETHING would not be so difficult.

Answer 8

Well, he might have said to himself "Damn, I forgot to call befoer I left" when he was on the road, that's why he called you when he got there. All you two have to do is simply start talking again. Like someone already said the phone works both ways.

Answer 9

Look talk to him. Ask him, how important I am to you? Hes probably going to say " really important" you should repond " really well sweetie I dont feel that way sometimes.. tell him the reasons... sometimes guy dont know whats priority. I mean hes knows your sick so hes thinking..... im going to leave her alone with her sickness... me might be thinking that u want to be alone... talk to him call him... i think your blowing this out of proportion

Answer 10

Let it go, people get crowded with other things then their relationships sometimes, frankly if i would think a guy was huge loser, if all he did was talk to his g/f and spend time with his g/f. thats not all there is...... stop being a drama queen, if you want him as a life partner and wanna marry him, you are definitely not giving him the right impression of yourself...