21 Month Old Demanding Bottle?

Question

My daughter is 21 months old and is still on the bottle (milk). My eight month old son just started on the sippy cup yesterday (heinz baby basics first tumblers) and he's taking to it okay. My daughter, however, wants no part of it, and just SCREAMS baba! She cries everytime she sees the cup, no matter what I put in it. I know that I should just let her cry it out and give her no choice, but thats SO hard. Last night, I gave them both the bottle for bed because that is what they are used to and what they are both comftorable with... I will stop that when they become used to the cup. But what do I do about my daughter right now? We were at a bday party yesterday and another little boy (13 months) was walking around with this same type of cup and my daughter kept stealing it from him and drinking out of it, so I went and bought her and my son one each.. why will she drink out of that little boy's cup and not her own, its the same one?

I KNOW its past time to get rid of the bottle, and I've been trying but because my kid were so close together, I couldn't take her off the bottle and give one to my son because she would just take his. She is going to the dentist today... i brush her teeth all the time but it doesn't make a difference. I know I'm at fault here and I don't need anyone to remind me of that, I just asked for ideas on HOW TO get her off the bottle... I already said I needed to GET HER OFF the bottle...

Answer 1

It is perfectly normal for a toddler to be nursing, it is normal to need the comfort of mom. That comfort has been replaced with a bottle for your child, some children have blankies, some have toys, and some have pacifiers, and some have mom.

I am not going to tell you what to do with your child, I don't know either of you. However I would warn against forcibly removing a child's security item before they are ready. And if you do remove it you need to be watching for signs of stress such as hair loss, teeth grining, difficulty sleeping, nightmares, regression etc.


If it were me:
I would begin by giving her a bottle AND a cup each time. Place water in the bottle, and the milk in the cup. Eventually your goal is to only offer milk at appropriate times so that it doesn't sit in her mouth. Then if she is carrying around a bottle of water for comfort at least it isn't rotting her teeth. You can continue to offer her last milk in a bottle or cup as you see fit. Just remember to brush teeth after the milk and before bed. A bottle of water during the night will not increase tooth decay, and may prevent it. Also you don't have to worry about it going bad.

Offer other comfort items. Try watching Poko with her. When he is scared or upset he (and his friends) hug a stuffed toy (his is a monkey). Once you find something else that works for her buy more than one. So you can wash one while she has the other, and in case one gets lost. Etc.

Once she is used to milk in a cup, and comfort from something else. Then you can use the "bottle fairy" to come and take away her bottles.

(Also bottles are better than sippy cups for proper tooth and jaw development. Bottles are developed with advice from dentists for long term use, they are designed to have minimal impact on tooth and jaw development -buck teeth etc. Sippy cups are meant to be a short term transitional step. They are not generally designed with a goal of minimal impact on tooth and jaw development, but rather either leak proof, or immitating a cup. Realistically any of the leak proof ones -which I use BTW for my son - do NOTHING to teach a child to drink from a cup. You don't suck out of a cup, you more or less pour it into your mouth. I use sippy cups because my son likes to imitate us using cups and he is breastfed so I only have a few bottles. He still gets medicine in bottles and breastfeeds. He is a year. Hopefully he will still be breastfeeding at age two and beyond.)

Oh and she will drink out of the boy's cup for the same reason kids will fight over a toy at a party, even if they have the same one at home they never use.

Answer 2

Yes, it is hard to listen to your daughter just scream and scream over a cup.
Without berating you further, the bottle should have been taken away months ago. But because we like to please our children sometimes, we throw caution to the wind and do what we can to make them happy.... (I know I have three kids!)
Please, be firm. If your son is taking from a cup just fine then it really is time to throw all the bottles away. I would keep one for the bedtime (but only for your son).
Offer your daughter some water out of a cup at bedtime and that's it. She shouldn't go to bed with a bottle anyway.

She probably took the cup from the other boy because she was being a bully (sorry--I remember when my twins would do that crap). So, she is able to drink from a cup--just not willing.
Don't give in and don't give her any other option than a cup.

Answer 3

is there anything she really likes my son is about the same age and he loves pink milk you know the nestle strawberry stuff you mix in he can;t get enough of it i would get some in the cup and drink it in front of her or in a glass for you and let her have a little taste i would even make it a bit sweeter then i would the rest of the time then tell her it only comes in the sippy cuphave a plain bottle out with normal milk and then have a sippy cup with pink milk its so good i am sure she'll pick the better of the 2 if you give her the choice and that way shes being a big girl and making her own decision and not feeling like your trying to take away something she loves

Answer 4

i have found that with my children (and sometimes my husband lol) forcing them to do what i want works a little better when you let them think it was their idea. what i did for both sons was first, i started diluting the milk, little by little. then i switched the nipples to preemie nipples. i'll never forget the last time my older one had a bottle- he took a couple sucks, looked up at me like "wtf mom? and threw it down, and that was that- the end!
i noticed that you said you have an eight month old- i think that could be part of the problem- she might just be trying to do anything to get some attention. sometimes when kids are "forced" into the big brother/sister role so early, they rebel. my boys were 22 months apart and it was suggested to me to take the older child on "dates" even if it was just around the block. i would always very conspicuously say " no ben! you can't come with us. this is my special time with nicky. i'll see you in a little while" and give the older child some undivided attention.
good luck and take care!

Answer 5

My daughter was 2 1/2 until she gave up the bottle. I tried many times to take it away and I could not handle the crying. Finally I used it as punishment. She was told a few times to stop misbehaving or she would no longer have her bottle and it worked. After 3 nights of her "big girl cup" she never mentioned the bottle again.

Answer 6

DO NOT give that child a bottle. She should have said good bye to the bottle at the age of 12 months. There are a type of sippy cup that might help make the transition easier on both of you. Nubby. They have a soft sippy spout that is alot like a bottle. It is well past time to get rid of her bottle.

Answer 7

that first poster is not entirely accurate
the teeth can possibly rot if you put the child to bed with a bottle
but is not always the case
son used a bottle ( I was going thru a divorce and the bottle comforted him mentally) until the age of 24 months and still at age 30 NEVER has had a cavity
sounds like your daughter has issues with the other baby taking her place..work on that first

Answer 8

Please take the bottle from your daughter. My daughter did the same thing and she is now three and her teeth are horrible. My daughter is so beautiful but her teeth look like they are rotten. Please please please, listen to me!! My daughter would take my sons bottles and go hide somewhere and drink them, so I know what it's like. ***My child did not take her bottle to go to bed. So maybe the other people just got lucky on their childs teeth. The dentist told me that this was what caused it.****And also, I am not negligent like someone else mentioned!! My daughter loves brushing her teeth and actually brushes them better than her older brothers. Her teeth are not rotten THEY APPEAR THAT WAY because the bottle wore them down and they are very tiny and even a sippy cup can cause this. The dentist recommended to us to only use a soft sippy cup. =)

Answer 9

I had to throw out all the bottles because my daughter wouldn't drink out of anyting else. let her pick out her own cup and maybe she'll like it better. don't put them to bed with a bottle or the milk will be in their mouths all night and cause cavities. also the milk can go back into the ear canal and cause infections. I know it's hard, but it's better in the long run.

Answer 10

OK, I dont see the big deal about just letting her have the bottle, but evidently these other moms are totally against it. My family (and my husbands) let us all keep our "ba-ba's" until we were like 4! My 2 1/2 yr old still take a bottle at night only. I dont think it doesn any damage to teeth unless your negligent about daily brushing and hygene.
Anyway, if you really must take the ol "ba-ba" away, you must let her cry it out and give her an incentive to give it up.