so my bf of 9 months broke up with my saying he didn't see the relationship going anywhere...but that he'd still like to be friends. he never before persued a friendship with an ex, but he said he felt compelled to do so with me. i told him fine, but i would need some time, because the breakup really hurt and surprised me. and suddenly he's calling me to just say hi, texting me at 5am, emailing me every single day. he tells me at a party he went because he knew i was going to be there...tells me he misses hanging out with me, and then apologizes and says everything was his fault. but i KNOW he doesn't want to get back together...i guess i just don't understand why he seems to have this need to keep in such close contact (i NEVER contact him)
2007-03-12 05:08:50 · 6 answers · asked by SarahS 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I, in MY opinion, wouldn't think it would be a great idea to keep so close contact with him. How are you supposed to get over him and move on, if he is there like nothing happened anyway? What happens when you start seeing someone else? What happens when HE starts seeing someone else? There is plenty of potential fights and the two of you never speaking again if this continues!
2007-03-12 05:14:04 · answer #1 · answered by amanda r 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This guy seems to have taking quite a fancy to you. This is a good thing! He says he wants to be friends and I believe this to be true. Simply tell him as a friend that you need a little space from him for a little while. If he truly is your friend, he'll understand. It's harder to go from lover's to friends instantly at times, but it can be done. They are usually the friends you have for a long time. Take the time you need and if you need more, just be honest and tell him this. You created a strong bond with him during your relationship and it sounds like he needs that. Don't confuse it with anything else though. Talk to him and lay all your cards on the table. Hope this helped!
2007-03-12 12:16:59 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
He seems to want to have his cake and eat it too. He broke up with you, but it seems he still wants to have a tab on you. If you think that the two of you can be friends that is fine, but the both of you need to establish boundaries because if you meet someone else and he calling and popping up at every party you are at, that will make it quite difficult for you to have another relationship. The both of you should talk and explain to him that boundaries have to be made...
2007-03-12 12:23:46 · answer #3 · answered by kiesha 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's just what people do. He'll get over it. Just don't answer his calls and don't hang out with him. It's hard to end a relationship even if you can't see your self with this person long term. He's just trying to get over a 9month attachment and the first reaction is to get your attention again.
2007-03-12 12:15:15 · answer #4 · answered by Mo 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sound like one of thwo things to me, he proably still really cares about you and really doesn't know what to do, or it sounds like he's just trying to give you that hope and keep you around, so you can't move on and he can still have his fun.
2007-03-12 12:13:37 · answer #5 · answered by dreamangel1102002 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
One word "guilt" He is trying to make himself feel better for hurting you. Don't allow this.
2007-03-12 12:18:52 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋