My boyfriend has been receiving texts from a girl and they are flirty messages. He's admitted to flirting with her. I am jealous of this as i don't understand why he feels the need to do it. I feel in a way that he is being disrespectful. This has been going on for over a month now and i have spoken to him about it. I kinda understand things until a point.
He has told me that he doesn't trust me near his phone and has admitted to me that this is one of the reasons why he is moving out. He says that he hopes when he goes the relationship will get better. In the mean time how can i get him to trust me? I don't want to look at his phone. I always believe that its best not knowing. He has said that if they were to meet up he'd never tell me as he wouldn't want a million questions asked on his return.
What can i do?
2007-03-12 04:46:09 · 13 answers · asked by GroovyChick 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
prove to them you can be trustworthy
for example, they asked you to be there early, go EXTRA early.
stuff like that. but don't kiss their butt.. if they can't forgive you after you are sorry and you do everything to prove to them, they are probably using you .
2007-03-12 04:49:32 · answer #1 · answered by John Becker 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like he is taking you for a fool. Sorry, but it does. If he loved and respected you he would not be flirting with his Ex! Just not done, kind of like rubbing your face in it, and the old chest nut about erghh moving out as you dont trust him and hopeing things will get better is a weak, and rather pathetic excuss to put back on you what he is doing. Ok so you shouldnt be reading his phone, but come on why is he flirting with the Ex, what exactly does he want to achive? I am sorry to say this but from what you have written, I think he is trying to get out of your relationship and doing it the cowards way, leaving you to feel guility. I would if I was you simply confront him about it, tell him how you feel, find out what he is playing at, and if he doesnt talk or stop the flirting then, you know he doesnt respect you and sadly there is no future. Well if that is the case you can do better, kick him way out of your life get over him and find someone who will treat you special and love and respect you as you should be.
Good luck, sorry my answer is all negative, I hope things work out for you.
2007-03-12 12:40:33 · answer #2 · answered by djp6314 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It very hard to trust again if you have been betrayed it sounds like you went through his phone if so why did you go through his phone, to me it seems you don't trust him either otherwise you wouldn't go through his phone in the first place, so their is a lack of trust on both sides.Trust is a big factor to a happy relationship. He shouldn't mind you checking his phone if he has nothing to hide. Trust can be rebuilt but it takes both of you to make the effort and you have to be honest with each other at all times. Moving out isn't the best solution if he's not around you to put your mind at rest you will only worry more when you are not with him and pester him more, unfortunately to me it would seem best to go your separate ways sorry x
2007-03-12 12:03:28 · answer #3 · answered by phillippa 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It seems to me as though you have a lot more feelings for him than he does for you, he wants to move out to play the field and to see where this other lady takes him.
He doesn't trust you not to read his texts, that's poor, and hardly an excuse to move out. You don't need to strive to regain his trust as he is playing you like a fiddle.
I am not being cynical or overly dramatic, he wants his cake and he wants to eat it all. Are you going to be part of that cake? Is he worth that much to you?
If he is then I would suggest time is all it will take, by being who you are and the person he got to like in the first place, but in my mind, I would be more concerned in the future how many more ladies is he going to send and receive flirtatious texts from.
He's leaving - let him and look elsewhere.
2007-03-12 11:56:51 · answer #4 · answered by Mad M 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
It all don't add up from first with this texts and now hes moving out over stupid things like that and now hes blaming it all on you so u look the bad one. Just leave him because it sounds like his playing away and hes not ready to have an commintent relationship. Just move on and find the right man who actually Love's you!!!!!
2007-03-12 12:41:41 · answer #5 · answered by princess nikki 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i dont think he's moving out because he doesnt trust you, he's moving out because he doesnt want to be with you and is too much of a coward to come out and just tell you
he has no reason to be sending flirty messages with another girl if he is with you and is living in your apartment.. and he is being extremely manipulative since he has turned you into the bad guy. i believe that in a relationship you have the right to find out the truth about what your partner is doing if they are not being completely honest with you.. **** their privacy, you have to look out for yourself
when he moves out you should move on
2007-03-12 11:54:21 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I feel that the guy seems abit strange he could put your feelings straight by being honest it seems he does like that call or he loves the fact that you get jealous that could turn him on. If that was me i think that i would take some time apart to see if hes who i really want. At the end of the day knowone deserves to be treated that way.!!!!!!
2007-03-12 12:04:54 · answer #7 · answered by poppy l 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
im sorry but if your boyfriend has nothing to hide then why wont he let you near his phone , theres something else going on between your boyfriend and this other girl , it should be you getting to trust him again not him with you , sorry but once that trust is gone i dont think it ever comes back id dump his sorry **** before you end up getting hurt .
if i found out my husband was txting another girl and flirting he would be gone to me thats cheating.
2007-03-12 12:04:13 · answer #8 · answered by fafandloo 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sorry but i think u were right to look at his messages and he said ur disrespectful jezz i would beat my partner black n blue if he was txtin flirty messages to sum slag. i wouldnt even be sorry seriously how do u no he hasnt met up with her and done stuff? im just bein honest here becoz it's out of order what he's done. plz dump this bastard and find someone who respects u and dont txt other girls behind ur bk. oh hes one lucky guy if i was his gf i would of killed him...
2007-03-12 11:55:57 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I am going through the VERY SAME THING...or i did anyway
rite b4 x-mas my man had his im's sent to his phone to chat with someone he met in a chat room, mind u we've bben together for over a year, so y he was in a chat room---u tell me... he got REAL possive over his phone, I too found text messages that were MORE the=an flirty, and when i confronted him bout it, he said "it's nothing, and your're trippin, and making somethin out of nothin" and to stay out of his phone and blah, blah, blah
Everytime he left his phone out, I was in it...we live together mind you...
My intiution bugged the hell out of me, even a month after the fact, so I got into his email one day, and guess what i found?
an email, from him to her saying everything i already knew,
he slept with her, and even after I knew all that i'm still tryin to stay with him, why? don't know--guess i love him
anyway, SHE was still emailing him, one day i got her on AIM, and started telling her to leave my man the hell alone, to go get one of her own and so on, it did help to confront her, and to let him know that I knew he did screw her, but now, i don't trust him at all,
you just gotta trust your instincts on this one?
you know why he don't trust you near his phone? because there IS something he's hiding from you...when he leaves it out get in it, and get what you're looking for cuz a man,boy,dude, whatever, will try to make u think you're goin crazy...and they always make you feel like its your fault...
IT'S NOT YOUR FAULT---HE'S THE ONE MAKIN A BIG MISTAKE
the fact that he told u he's movin out scares me
you need to know what's goin on, don't let him string you along like my man did to me, find out the truth
if he don't want u tell him to leave
you dont need this **** girl
whatever you do, please don't let him blame this on you, and talk to your friends, you need all the support you can get now
if you need to talk to me again, feel free
i know how it is to go through this, and you don't need to go through it alone k?
email if u want
lilleene29@yahoo.com
2007-03-12 12:04:04 · answer #10 · answered by lilleene29 1 · 2⤊ 0⤋
leave him leave him leave him .... if he is flirting with another a girl AND moving out what does that tell you... you dont need to worry about his trust he just making up excuses this way he can f*** that other chick.
2007-03-12 11:50:19 · answer #11 · answered by Carly-Bear 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋