I think that americans are very individualistic people. once they are out of college, unless they are some kind of celebrity or super outgoing. most people end up getting very lonely and do most things by themselves. It is so hard to be close to someone. I am going through that situation and I am looking for a girlfriend. My problem is that every time I meet new people, I only get to see them once and we never meet again. I'm not the type that is very good socially and will get people attention when I work the room. What do you think?
2007-03-11 20:48:37 · 16 answers · asked by 21questions 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
First off, try thinking this way....You don't know any of these people you meet so who gives a damn how you act towards them. This kind of thinking may allow you to open up a bit. You won't be so nervous.
Also, try stepping out side of you little box and get some life experience. Do something. Take dance lessons. Go on a vacation. Make some memories of your own, that way when you do meet somebody, you can talk about your stories and that will keep the other person intrigued. They will be thinking "wow, this person rocks" instead of "um, I have to go wash my hair" or whatever excuse they use to get away from you.
If you wanna do something wierd to liven you up, call 411 (information) and talk to the person on the other end. When they ask city and state, be like "how are you doing? where are you at?"
2007-03-11 20:59:11 · answer #1 · answered by Amy A 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I am the same way. I meet someone very interesting and when I get to know them well enough I never see them again. I am not good socially so I am not noticed that much. People like us are at a disadvantage because the only way to survive in the world and live a full life is if you are outgoing. I wish you luck in getting a girlfriend and I hope that I do to.
2007-03-12 03:58:07 · answer #2 · answered by Mehman 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
No, I don't think you are at a disadvantage because you are shy. A lot of individuals find shy people less aggressive and more polite. What you should do is get online with myspace.com and hook up with people in a certain category that you can relate to. I'm sure they have some groups of people who belong to those who are shy and want to form friendships or relationships. You should also make an effort to do things, become active in your neighborhood, join a gym, go to a Church, and you can meet others that way. I have seen many others form friendships, even at laundromats. Check out the "personals" section in newspapers or periodicals. There are many women out there like you who are shy and just need a nudge to start socializing. So here's your "nudge".
2007-03-12 03:55:20 · answer #3 · answered by gone 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If everyone was outgoing, the world would be a boring place. What you have to do is turn your shyness into an asset. Don't say that you are shy...but that you are "reserved." Being reserved, you like to "scope" people and places out before you actually "open" yourself up. That is OKAY! And, it's a little mysterious as well! I'm a reserved person but have learned to use it to my advantage and actually "hide" my shyness. I'm probably older and more experienced in life than you, however...just take my advise and all will be well!
2007-03-12 03:55:08 · answer #4 · answered by marincaligirl 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
In this day and age it is best to be lonely it keeps you disease free and out of trouble. Hang in there the one that was meant for you will cross your path then you will be locked at the hips. Just don't go along with someone if it doesn't feel right because in the heat of the moment you will be thinking your wish has come true then all hell will break loose.
2007-03-12 03:58:18 · answer #5 · answered by littlegrizz 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Shyness on its own is not a problem but the catch there is that yes it does lead to lonliness if not controlled but it does not always lead to lonliness.
This is a loud and gregarious generation and so, shyness imposes some limitations or is disadvantageous to whomsoever possesses it as an atribute.
However, it could be turned into serious advantage if careful cultured and projected.
2007-03-12 03:58:48 · answer #6 · answered by comradechris 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I didn't read your big long explanation paragraph. Too many words.
The answer is yes. Self promotion, appearances, confidence (whether you deserve to have it or not), and bullshit rule this sad world of ours. Unless you become as deluded as the idiots that are succeeding in the world, and start to feel entitled, you'll get nowhere.
2007-03-12 03:55:40 · answer #7 · answered by no answers here 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
People today are very busy, self involved, cautious, and who knows what else---people were always that way--they are individuals--it is how they choose to live. you just aren't meeting the right people--but you will--keep trying. Remember to stay groomed, brush the teeth and wash the hair--dress appropriately, smile, be nice, be yourself...hey it will work out.
2007-03-12 03:54:08 · answer #8 · answered by fire_inur_eyes 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I believe that it is true, being shy doesn't help especially for guys, I've been training myself out of it for a few years now and have had success, with women especially. just start hanging out with people more establish contacts, and be yourself, people will realize all that you have to offer and your circle of friends will grow.
Soon enough you'll meet that girl through a friend and it will all click trust me.
2007-03-12 03:53:19 · answer #9 · answered by Sagely 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You just need to come out of your shell and start asking people for their numbers even if you just met them....you should always make contacts and keep in touch with them that way you'll always have a friend somewhere.
2007-03-12 03:54:30 · answer #10 · answered by oo_m_i_c_h_e_l_l_e_oo 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋