So I'm 19 years old, never believed in cooties, and have been very attracted to girls since kindergarden. I can name every girl since then I've ever had a crush on. Around 4th grade, I started buying presents for the girl I liked that year, you know like holiday gifts. But, I'm incredibly shy and so I pretty much never talked to the girl.
So, this is how it went for all those years. Find the girl in my class I'm attracted to. Let her know I like her through written notes or over the Internet, never in person. Buy her presents on the holidays. Eventually ask her out and get rejected.
Toward high school, I got better and was beginning to feel comfortable talking to girls without thinking of them as a potential girlfriend. But then I graduated and moved away to a school with very few people.
Also, I'm extremely skinny and can't build muscle very easily. So, I have a lot of self-esteem and confidence issues. These issues keep me shy, and as a result, I can never get a girl. HELP!!
2007-03-11 16:52:02 · 6 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
How romantic! Mr. Mysterious. I'm surprised you can't sweep a girl off of her feet.
Well, it's not all about muscles. It sounds like you have a first impression thing to work out. Read, read, read! Get a kickin' hair cut, add some dashing clothes that make you feel like a million bucks. Remain mysterious. Women really go for mysterious. Don't do all the talking. But still communicate well and clearly. Ask her questions, listen quietly, and remember what she says.
Make her feel like the center of the world. Not yours. Not yet. Be attentive and romantic, but keep your cool and let things flow. All she needs to know is what you hint at. If she asks, you briefly proceed. You've gotta let her chase a little. Make sure she knows where your talents are. Travel? Baseball? Bonsai? Hint at them. There lies your power. Women like men with power. What makes you powerful? What are you really good at?
How educated are you, and do you have a decent job? Women may not admit it, but they like well groomed, powerful, well educated and steady incomes. You may be there, or these could be goals. Success brings success. It reels in the women. Be positive. Keep the ball moving forward. Slowly. Greatest luck to you!
2007-03-11 17:19:48 · answer #1 · answered by Lana Lang 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I was Skinny in high school too & took a lot of slack for it but, I had a steady girlfriend all through high school.My girl problems did'nt start untill I got into my late 20s.My self esteem seemed to go down hill from there. Women like a confidant man.Try those power drinks you get in the health store. I never had much luck lifting whieghts but,I had big upper arms which the girls seemed to love. Big Upper arms are not that hard to get. Do three sets of bicept curls starting out light and adding weight with each set. Do this three times a week.This will raise you're confidance. Don't give up. Good luck.
2007-03-12 00:17:15 · answer #2 · answered by jimbobob 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My suggestion is to go to start working out with weights. You will build up muscle and get some pecks and a nice build eventually . That will give you self esteem. Drink alot of vitamin shakes too. Also, start dressing better. Don't wear baggy shirts or baggy pants, because it will only accentuate your thinness. Also don't wear short sleeves, wear long sleeve shirts with a jacket and wear clothes that fit. Get a nice sport jacket, great dress jeans, nice shirts, like a black shirt, a dark brown shirt, a button down dress shirt. Nice pair of loafers and dark socks. Don't wear white socks. Now when you have some nice clothes, try going out to some pubs or clubs where young people hang out and see if you can find someone. If not, I would try match.com or eharmony.com. These are two great dating websites and they are legitimate. Also, you must try to have confidence in yourself as your shyness is holding you back and you are not giving off good vibes. Also try getting a book at Borders, "How to be successful in the dating world","Understanding Women". Anything to learn how to be more successful with the opposite sex. Don't worry, just see if you can use all these recommendations and start having some confidence. You will meet someone special if you really want it and have high self esteem and confidence. Good Luck to You.
2007-03-12 00:06:38 · answer #3 · answered by cardgirl2 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I did not have a girlfriend until I was 19, and sometimes I feel like even that was too soon. What you need to do is focus on yourself. Don't worry about what other people think about you or about getting a girlfriend. Start doing things that you like to do. Go listen to some live bands even if they are small time. Hang out with friends. Go to church functions. When you get involved with something that you like to do then you will be surrounded by people with the same interests and one girl will stick out and things will click.
2007-03-12 00:04:56 · answer #4 · answered by Patrick E 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like you're in a difficult situation. My only recommendation is not to try so hard. I know it doesn't make sense, but it's true when people say, "It's something that happens to you. You'll know it when it happens." Don't try to force someone to be in a relationship with you. It won't work that way. I know it's hard to be patient. Continue to be friends with them and help them see what kind of person you are. Enjoy the friendships and keep waiting for that right one to come along.....even though waiting is hard. When you two meet each other, you'll both be glad you waited. I wish it was more comforting for you in this moment, though.
2007-03-11 23:58:06 · answer #5 · answered by Eastern US Guy 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Maybe you need some therapy...you sound like a nice enough person, but I think you try too hard, from a DISTANCE....You need to get up close and personal...
If you're in college they have therapists to help you...
2007-03-11 23:58:35 · answer #6 · answered by Chrys 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋