Today I had a bad shock. Bad enough to make me lose confidence in any one and in myself. I discovered he was cheating on me, that he letting me go on in it...I feel awful, destroyed, panicked. How did he do it? and Why? I don't trust any man anymore. I am beautiful and well-educated and well-behaved, but I lost faith in finding true love. I lost faith in me. I am in mid-twenties.
It is awful how it feels. He was escaping being face to face with me. Now I got the image
I can't handle it peacefully. Tell me what to do
Thanks
2007-03-11 16:45:27 · 15 answers · asked by LaRoseJaune 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Don't hang your image of yourself and your self-worth on somebody else, especially not somebody who lies and cheats.
Also realize that this person cheated on you for his own reasons, because of his own insecurities, his own need to have his ego massaged etc. not because of something that you are not.
Be strong, believe in yourself. LOVE yourself.
The best advice anyone ever gave me was 'be your own best friend'. What would you tell your best friend in this situation? Would you tell her she was a worthless loser? NO? Well don't tell yourself that either. You deserve better than the way this selfish idiot has treated you.
Take care x
2007-03-11 16:52:04 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
First! You don't blame yourself. He's a Moron, and you didn't cause it. Next? To prevent this from happening again? You need to take this Quick Course on Love 101. One Lesson, Here it is. Love has to come from the Heart. Yours and His. If it ain't? It ain't Love. If it ain't Love? Then you're wasting your time. Which is what you've been doing. (no offense) Now start letting Your Heart do the talking. Yes! Your Heart! Let it tell you who's right for you. Stop looking for Brad Pitt? Or someone with money. The Heart that is right for you? May not be like that. But he is eager to meet you. So don't sit around pouting. You're depriving someone of a chance to make you happy. Good Luck? And Good Love
2007-03-11 23:53:41 · answer #2 · answered by Goggles 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well I want to tell you that I am proud of you, Im proud because you already said something a lot of girls going through what you're going through can't always say you said you're beautiful and well educated etc.... Props to you hun and that's your answer too. You are going to be fine. You'll be better then fine because you have so much going for you. I know it's hard here's a shocker too to help show you a lot of women have been through it and gotten over it and been just fine. I used to date this guy and I kind of had a feeling something was going on. I went to my sisters apartment and he happend to be there. They both denied anything ever happening and our relationship ended shortly after. Well abotu 5 years later this past December I was at my parents for christmas where my sister now lives. I picked up the phone to make a call and she was on the phone I heard the news devastating even though I hadnt dated the guy for years my suspiscion was confirmed. I was so angry mostly at my sister she had lied to my face about it several times. But I have to tell you hun I did know he cheated on me with other girls and he wasnt the only guy to do such mean things to me. I am now very happy with my hubby of 2 years. I have never been happier he tells me how pretty I am and how much he needs me in his life and the most important thing for me is I trust him with everything I have. You are young still you can beat this you can. With the support and help of others you'll do just fine.
If you need to talk to someone who has been through it e-mail me and I would love to listen to your problems and I will help you as much as I can. Feel free to. creardon84@yahoo.com
2007-03-12 00:09:05 · answer #3 · answered by Princess K! 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First thing you need to do is realize that it isn't you. From your description, you sound like a wonderful person, he just forgot how wonderful you were and how lucky he was to have you. It's not going to be easy, but start picking yourself up off the floor, decide what you are going to do, and get on with it. You have a lot going for you, you are still young and can do whatever you want to do. I wish you all the best, and hang in there. It will get better, you will meet the one you will trust again someday.
2007-03-11 23:53:04 · answer #4 · answered by Jbr 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
" men by nature are cheaters" for me if i were in that situation i would think of it as a positive sign, why, cause im glad that ive seen the truth, that as early as now the man im with is worthless and a cheating b@stard and i would be thankful because i caught him, so that he would no longer make me look life a fool
i would be thankful for the knowledge that im beautiful and well educated and because of that i deserve a better man,
i know it would hurt a lot but i would totally appreciate the fact that he is out of my life, cause no way would i want to stay with that kind of man who doesnt even have loyalty and self control, be thankful cause you know now that he is not worth loving and that you can move on to a better life.without him
it would not be bad, to take a break from men for a while, men are not all like that, you just were with the wrong guy, dont generalize, just be happy atleast you know now what kind of man he is , youve learned a very important lesson in life, but dont reach the point where you would refrain from being happy, celebrate, the journey of truth!
life is not about men you know
2007-03-11 23:52:48 · answer #5 · answered by haringmarumo 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
yah, it sucks, isn't it? i know it is very painful. but the point is this-being betrayed also happens to even the most beautiful woman in the world, the celebrities who have almost everything. your bf was a jerk but not all men are. take a rest from relationships for a while but don't close your door to a new love later on. and, girl, don't lose faith in yourself. it wasn't your fault-as long as you did everything to keep your relationship intact-don't blame yourself. take a hiatus.continue loving yourself. maintain your confidence. surround yourself with your loved ones-those who understand what you're going through. you will need them at this time. heal the wounds, but live your life. don't be afraid to fall in love again. pray for the right man for you. good luck.
2007-03-11 23:55:01 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Cry and except that it's OK to love him but get your *** out, let it take time and work on your life for a while and then start dating again just to get the feel of it, the right one will come a long but you have to be ready for him or it will do you no good no matter how many great guys come a long.
2007-03-11 23:49:27 · answer #7 · answered by Cjara 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
do you have a close friend that you can talk this over with? a trusted coworker, clergy person or anyone? you need someone who truly cares about you to talk over this with. and don't lose faith... these things are learning experiences. it hurts very badly but the pain fades and you are left that much wiser and stronger!
2007-03-11 23:49:12 · answer #8 · answered by fullofsugaw 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
buy a box of chocolate and a bottle of vodka and get wasted then tommorow go to a bar and find the new mr. right u may think that he was the only one but i bet in a month there will be a new guy
2007-03-11 23:50:14 · answer #9 · answered by mxbadboy89 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Put him out of your mind before you lose your ****, girl. call up pals or mom or someone non judgemental you can chill with. take a bubble bath. drink some wine. don't throw out the baby with the bathwater...some guy out there knows how to keep it in his pants...dump the loser. Get checked for std's...seriously!!!
2007-03-11 23:50:29 · answer #10 · answered by Stormy 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋