I need some honest answers a lot of them asap! PLEASE?

Question

If u wrote a guy a poem at xmas time & then u had an arguement where he said he made his decision & does not want to b with u all he wants is to be on his own at the moment & make his own decisions but He was NOT going to b with anyone else & WILL NEVER be & u said to him i guess that settles it then & its obvious becoz the poem is gone from your beside table & he turns around & say *anna I still have it in my room & u know he has coz u have already sussed it out & he still has your photos & gifts u have given him. What would u think? Country boy workaholic, has a lot of decisions to make - his sister says just let him be for a while until he gets sorted if he wants u he will come & get u when hes made his decision & he has a lot on at the moment - which he does. When u go down he offers for u to stay & does not care who sees you there. Do u think all he needs is time? He seems interested in what ive been doing & when I go to c him he asks what ive been doing and what I am doing for

week. Would you think he had someone else?
We broke up last July were together for 4yrs.
Sometimes when i go to visit he seems happy and others quite moody. What do I do I really love the man that much!
He has also told people when they have asked if we are getting back together that no not at the moment we are having a break. His flatmate told me last week that he had told him this also.
I know i have asked this question a few times and i am sorry but I really need a few more answers
I went there last week and he was out so i cleaned his house and stuff coz i know hes been busy driving trucks etc. He came home and said "what r u doing here" I said came to visit. Then he said oh u made my bed for me and was real nice about it and stuff. Hes still quite happy with me to stay there and i was talking to his flatmate who told me that when he asked him if we were goin to get back together the guy in question said no not at the moment we are having a break.

And he is dead set he hasn't been with anyone else and will never be so whats the go?
Went to c him last nite and hes interested in what im doing wants me to come back and show him when i get my next lot of course assignments back but he reckon we won't work - i said i believe we can and he said well not at them moment as i have a lot on my plate!
And the letter I wrote him 3 wks ago he hasn't looked so i asked him if he would like me to take it and he said no i will read it when i have time!
This whole thing has me stumped!
Whats holding the guy back?

Do you think he will come round? I mean he takes an interest in what im doin all the time as he wants to c my results from my course i am doing?

I was talking to his flatmate 2 weeks ago and said to him that He tells people when they ask if we are getting back together that no not at the moment we are having a break and his flatmate said yes he has told me that.
Also his best mate said to me "u 2 will work through things" so would you guys think that sounded positive?

Answerer no 8. His name is not jack it is short for JACKIE

Answer 1

Whoa... to much too look at. Back off and if he wants you he will come to you. Quit bugging or he will disappear- men dont like clingy women....

Answer 2

wow, you've got a lot on your mind huh? well i could tell you about as much as you told me but here is the short sweet answer...... you have tons of love to give, you deserve someone who is willing to receive it and openly give it right back to you. The object of your affections is blowing you off, he is tuned into work and you deserve much much more than the back burner he has placed you on. Don't look for another companion right away, just accept the break and stop searching him out. yes it will be hard, but it the long term effects of what is currently going on will be much worse. hang in there you seem like a real catch and will make some guy very happy, and that guy will know what he has and will let you know how much he loves you everyday. In the mean time get into a good bible believing church, don't find religion, find a relationship with Jesus th Christ. That in itself is the best advice anyone could give you. feel free to email me with any questions.... Good Luck and remember tomorrow is a new day!

Answer 3

if after an argument with you he said it was over and he would never be with anyone else you must have hurt him bad. He may hang on to the things you gave him and your photos to remember the good times. If he has alot of decisions to make let him be to make them. Quit asking everyone if he is gonna take you back because you sound desperate and like a stalker. He lets you stay because he is a nice guy and doesn't care who you see because he is over you. You need to let him have time to himself. If you have gone over unannounced to stay the night that is wrong. Maybe he is gay and doesn't know how to tell you. Give it a rest don't call or go over for the next 2 months and see if he calls you.

Answer 4

well, this is a really hard one. i say that as i know how it feels when you really love someone and they are not responding in the way that you would like them to. but i think that you should just back off a little bit and let him breathe or you might just end up pushing him away and i know that is not what you want to do. let him know that you are there for him if he needs to talk and that you still love him very much, but that you also undersatnd that he needs time. tell him that you dont want to put any pressure on him but that you feel very hurt and confused as you keep receiving mixed signals. but i think that if he says that he needs some time alone, you must respect that and just hope that he realises that he has a great girl that loves him very much and wants to be with him. there really is nothing else you can do babe, you cannot force someone to be with you, and more to the point you wouldnt want to. as for him being happy that you made his bed etc, i think that he does care for you and KNOWS how much you care for him and doesnt want to hurt your feelings by being abrupt.i really hope that it works out for you, just back away a little and see what happens.

Answer 5

There is a book called he's just not that into you.

This could be the case. He is playing the field so to speak and has every right to do so because you are no longer officially an item.

Now coming down to see him and giving up the goods .he gets hassle free sex without the interruptions during study time.
You get a weekend away.

Maybe that is it for now, time will tell.

Just be honest with yourself and go out on dates if you chose.

Answer 6

I think I agree with Fat, leave him alone for awhile, give him a chance to miss you. I know you love him, and you're afraid that if you back off he'll leave for good, but if you keep pushing him he's going to keep backing up. They say "absence makes the heart grow fonder", give him some room to make up his mind what he wants to do. He might just be trying to be nice to you and that's why he acts like he's interested, but if you keep crowding him, eventually he will get pissed and start hating you. IMO, you really need to step back and give him some breathing space.

Answer 7

WOW!! I'm out of breath just reading this thing. That being said, I think you would be better off to bide your time, He may come back or not. You can't force it. Find someone else for now. You may find you like that person even better. If you get too clingy you will just drive him away for sure.

Answer 8

I think you need to listen to the sis, guys a tun of the time have trouble going from man she's hot, to I love her, and it's hard for them, and if you make it to easy on him like your always at his beck and call he doesn't have to make a choice. Milk for free hun, he's not going to buy something he doesn't feel like he has to pay for, and even if your telling him that your willing to be his, he knows it but you have to show him that you have a life of your own, and you have to let him have time to remember how great you are, because if your always in front of him he doesn't ever have to remember you.

Answer 9

If you love him, let him go. If he really loves you, he will come back to you. If not, it is time to move on with your life.
"Distance makes the heart grow fonder" or makes you forget. Also, it kinda sounds like you are smothering him. Give him some space and see what happens.

Answer 10

Honestly ~~~ let it go. I know it is hard. 4 years is a long time. You are grieving over your dead relationship. The denial stage is what you are in and you need to wake up and ENJOY living your life.
Go out more, take classes, tour the country or state you live in. Make new friends and move on.
If he misses you, he will contact you. You are more than obviously going to make yourself available to him as soon as he dials your number. I'm kinda embarassed for you. You will live without him, I promise.

PS If his name is Jack, you need to change your user name and create your own identity.