I'm getting to the point were i'm sleep deprived and i think she is doing it on purpose. For the first time I beat my daughter, i have done everything possible, i got a night light , a radio, i've left the tv on all night. For the past month all of a sudden she acts like a crazy woman when it is time to go to bed, and on the rare nights she does go do sleep calmly she wakes up in the middle of the night. I am 3 months pregnant with my second child and every time i go thru this with my daughter i begin cramping and spotting. She is going to cause me to miscarry this baby and i believe i will resent her and blame her for it if it does not stop. She doesn't even know i'm pregnant yet so it can't be that. Help be for my daughter kills my unbord baby.!
2007-03-11 15:12:59 · 18 answers · asked by frustratedmom 2 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Parenting
OK, first off you need to examine PHYSICALLY what is going on in your daughter's life. Is she drinking sodas with caffeine? It took me a few times to finally put it together, but if my 8 year old son drinks just ONE soda past a certain time in the day, he will stay up forever and have trouble sleeping. So examine your daughter's diet, and see if there could be some culprits. Sugar, chocolate, soda, all of those could be contributing.
Secondly, what about HER lack of sleep, she's got to be cranky as well, and a child that age needs her sleep. You really believe an 8 year old is plotting every nite to keep you awake and sleep deprived? Get a grip on yourself and ACT like a concerned parent, not a selfish brat.
Thirdly, GO TO THE DOCTOR....it could be a physical problem, emotional problem. Once you rule out all those issues, then perhaps your daughter is playing you at night....
And please, don't you dare blame your eight year old for a miscarriage...., you need to grow up and be the adult.
2007-03-11 15:37:09 · answer #1 · answered by reddevilbloodymary 6 · 3⤊ 2⤋
*I apologize for my previous response. It was mean and cruel. You went here looking for support and help, and thats what you should recieve.
** I forgot to mention my niece has a problem with nightmares if she drinks milk two hours before she goes to bed. Anytime she drinks milk two hours or closer before bedtime she will wake up with really bad dreams.
Having three children and being pregnant with the fourth I can understand how hard stress can be. It is hard not blame her for your extra stress. However, you must remember she is eight years old -- which I'm sure is hard to do when your spotting and bleeding.
I miscarried a child before in the first trimester. I had the same thing, so I do suggest that you call your OB up right away. It was my third pregnancy and I thought maybe- if something was different - the results would be different. The ER doctor and the my OB both said -- no there was that could have been done to prevent it. It was frusterating because I had to wait about two weeks to confirm it because it was early in the pregnancy, and the only way to tell was through my blood count dropping. I still wish my third pregnancy would have gone well, but I am grateful that with all the next pregnany after that a healthy baby was born. He is one now, and I'm pregnant again.
Even if she doesn't know, kids have a strong sense when parents feel differently towards them. She may sense that you are having trouble something in your life. With each case she is looking for a loving and supporative mother so just try to hold her and calm her down, and focus on her.
I would also give a call to the peditrician and he or she could propobly direct you to the right person to talk too. I would also watch if her behavior when she is around other people -- for example when comes home from school, after spending the night at a friends house, etc. This could be sign of sexually molested.
You are a good mother, and you coming here and admitting that you lost took alot of courage. I had no right to be so mean before, because that was being a hippacrit and I wish you the best of luck. If you need to talk someone send me a message if you want.
I hope you get some sleep soon. If you can, sleep while she is at school and that might help you at night. I know you propobly have errands to run and other things to do but do try to get as much as rest as you can.
If you do end up misscarrying (and I hope you don't) remember it's no one fault. It's one of those miserable things that were forced to deal with. I honestly wouldn't let your daughter know about the baby, until you know for sure it's healthy or your going to make it to term.
Besides that issue, here is are websites that will help your daughter:
http://www.mindpub.com/art401.htm
http://www.baptistonline.org/health/library/chil3071.asp
http://www.georgiafamily.com/health_and_safety/sleep_dreams.shtml
2007-03-11 22:28:51 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 2⤋
"i've left the tv on all night.' There's part of the problem right there. One of the major problems in sleep disorders in children is a television in their bedroom. The flickering light keeps their brains from entering REM sleep and they are semi awake all night long. That will account for the fits at bedtime...SHE is actually sleep deprived...There is no reason a child needs a television/game system or even a stereo in their bedrooms (let's just hope there isn't a computer in there too huh?). A bedroom is a place for relaxation, rest, sleep and reflection. Not a "rumpus room".
Secondly the way YOU are acting here on the boards gives great insite as to what is going on at home. You are placing a large amount of importance on your unborn child and neglecting your eight year old. That is WHY she is having problems sleeping. She probably feels that once the unborn one is here she is going to be replaced...you will no longer love her, no longer want her...I know that would be enough to keep be awake at night if I were eight years old.
How about including her in on the preperations for the new baby, ask for HER input, talk about what a big help she is going to be and how lucky this new baby will be to have such an attentive older sibling. From what I'm reading you've made nothing about your pregnancy a positive thing in your eight year old's life, so of course she is going to have trouble sleeping. She is scared and beating her only reinforced that fear as well as resentment for both you and the new baby...
2007-03-11 23:19:22 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
Don't ever take the sleeping pills route!!
1. They will damage your liver big time and you can get into serious health problems.
2. You will get hooked up on them and you won't be able to have a normal life any more if you don't take your pills everyday.
The sleeping pills industry is damaging our health by capitalizing on our ignorance, and by distracting people from effective and natural ways to deal with this problem. I had been taking prescription sleep medications [Ambien] for over 5 years. It stopped working and I simply took more. Still did not work. Nights were very difficult - medication put me to sleep but I would wake up after 2–3 hours with a strong sympathetic response (fast pulse, pounding heartbeat, wide awake alert). It was a very difficult cycle to break. I was really in bad shape due to lack of sleep.
After years of struggling I was able to cure my insomnia naturally and pretty fast. I followed the Sleep Tracks sleep optimization program, here is their official web -site if you want to take a look: http://www.insomniacure.net
Ohhh..and Good Luck!
2014-09-17 11:31:32 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I agree, this is a potentially dangerous situation, and I dont blame you for feeling as though you would resent her in a way....I think a counselor would be a good idea, as it seems to be an emotionally triggered action your daughter does this every night, not any physical fear or ailment. Inthe mean time, would it help console your daughter to sleep in the bed with you at night? At least that would aleviate the immediate risk of you miscarring due to the stress. Good Luck, I truly feel for you, and am sorry I cant give any better advice. I really havent heard of a similar situation before.
2007-03-11 22:22:40 · answer #5 · answered by mayasmama2707 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
"For the first time I beat my daughter" you need some help. Shes 8 doesnt need mommy to sit up with her all night. Maybe she's got insominia take her to see her dr explain what is going on she can get some short term medications to help out. Or go buy her some OTC sleep aids. Your daughter will not cause you to miscarry trust me on this one. Because I have a daughter that was diagnosised terminally ill when I was pregnant spent most of my pregnancy in the hospital touch and go. If you miscarry its because you werent ment to have this child. Now you need some help for even touching your child in a manner that was not loving.
2007-03-11 23:05:25 · answer #6 · answered by texas_angel_wattitude 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Sometimes the best answer is the one we don't want to hear for one reason or the other. It sounds as if she is afraid of something when she has to go to bed, or she just does not want to go because she wants here way.
If it is the later, then maybe mom needs to go to bed with her, lay in the bed with her til she falls to sleep. Yes, I know they say don't do this, but really, what harm can it do, if it will get her sleeping pattern back on course. Even if she wakes in the night, assure her you are there for her and go to her bedside.
If she is afraid and you being with her is not enough because she thinks you will leave her as soon as she falls to sleep, then make her a small pallet (bed with pillow), on the floor beside your bed or at the end of it. Let her sleep there, or if she goes to sleep in her own bed and wakes at night, let her come in and sleep on the floor beside your bed. It will not last forever, and it wont hurt you nor keep you up nearly so much.
Good luck and "sweetness and sweet dreams to you all!"
2007-03-11 22:28:41 · answer #7 · answered by kickinupfunf 6 · 1⤊ 2⤋
Well, ok, let's start with the fact that your daughter cannot kill your unborn baby. I don't think the stress can either- so I would call your doctor right away about the cramps and spotting.
Secondly, your daughter probably does know that your pregnant, she just might not know she knows. Children, especially females, tend to be very receptive to changes in their environment- even things we think they don't notice. It may be as simple as cues from changes in your behavior.
Third, check her ears. It could be a mild ear infection- not enough to cause severe pain but enough to be bothersome. Or possibly some other medical reason. Take her to the pediatrician for a checkup.
And for heaven's sake, DO NOT BEAT YOUR CHILD.
2007-03-11 22:23:33 · answer #8 · answered by Robin J. Sky 4 · 2⤊ 3⤋
A small amount of benadryl should do the trick , make sure you follow the dosing directions on how much to take for her weight. it will put her sleep , it can take up to an hour to work though. good luck !! Also , if you feel like your going to hurt her you need to call someone , either a family member , local child protection agency or 911 . Please dont physically discipline her , she is only 8 years old.
2007-03-11 22:52:12 · answer #9 · answered by pure_sweetness1984 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Ok, stop what you are thinking which is disturbing. Your #1 problem is your daughter is having sleeping problems. You need to speak to her doctor. She will NOT cause you to miscarry, do not blame her for that! You are the adult, take charge and find out what you can do to help her. If she is not getting to bed on time she can begin to have night terrors. Also, if you let her watch anything scary on TV she can be afraid to go to bed and have nightmares. Be a mother and get her help...how dare you blame her.
2007-03-11 22:23:00 · answer #10 · answered by intrigue899 3 · 4⤊ 3⤋