What is your practice for loving?

Question

It’s seems so easy to ‘feel’ for ourselves and to only ‘see’ others.

Do you have any regular practice (religious or not) that allows you a way of ‘feeling’ what is happening with other people?

I’m not so interested in how you feel for family and friends, but for those people who are strangers or maybe even people you haven’t gotten along with in the past.

What is your practice for loving with equanimity, or are you fortunate to be one of those people where this comes natural?

Answer 1

I often find myself trying to put myself in their position. Like if I see someone who's angry I try to find out why and then I can better sympathize with their mood, not take it personally, and still be kind to them knowing their anger is not really directed at me, but rather a situation that made them angry. As a writer, I often try to look at the whole picture when it comes to my encounters with complete strangers because all people have something that motivates them, their moods, and their actions. I do a lot of this naturally via character work when I'm creating characters for stories. When you look at those motivations I think you can better sympathize with that common human experience you both share and therefore find it in your heart to have compassion for people even if their actions anger or annoy you.

Answer 2

This is very hard to do, but anytime you pray for others and especially strangers or people you don't get along with, you are practicing love. Sometimes, I try to connect with others on an energy level to see if I can experience what they are experiencing. I don't know if this works or not, but practicing empathy, I think would be a practice of love, also.

Answer 3

How do I love others? A great question!

I give money to anyone who asks, donate 15% of my income to spread the Gospel, volunteer as an Emergency Medical Technician and fireman at the local fire department, offer understanding and attempt to reach concensus with those who oppose me at work - speaking good of them while they speak ill of me (a slow process but it is starting to work in ways I never imagined), and pick up all hitch hikers.

Does this come naturally for me?

No. I'm no Mother Teresa, so if I am to love others as Jesus said, it'll have to be in a practical way. I am motivated by His words which tell me I must pray for my enemies and love those who hate me. But, it has become easier with practice. The world taught me to fear, to hate, to strike back; Jesus taught me a better way. I struggle against my anger every day, but it slowly is becoming less of a problem. Without Jesus, I'd be a very angry, very destructive man.

Answer 4

Get into a job where you have to work with the public.

I work in a public library and have to help people apply for unemployment on-line when they've never used a computer. Or help someone research the cancer treatment the doctor has just ordered for their kid. Not to mention the lonely people who just want to talk.

It's not hard to have empathy. You just have to practice opening your eyes and Listen to what they say, and when you catch yourself thinking "I'm glad I don't have to live through that," you suddenly know for certain that it COULD be you, and BAM!!! you want to do much more than "feel their pain."

It becomes EASY to make the effort to help them as much as you can ... the way, you hope, someone might help you someday.

Answer 5

When we only "see" the troubles of others, we have sympathy for them. When we "feel" the troubles of others, we have empathy for them.
I have learned, not only to have sympathy for others, but empathy also. This comes from my belief in God and the teaching "love your brother as yourself". Also, years of nursing with several of those years as a Hospice nurse, has helped me to feel for others. This feeling comes naturally for me.

Answer 6

i think that this comes naturally or maybe it is a gift from God, i pastor at a men's homeless mession and teach them about the love of Jesus on practical ways by helping them on there way home, loving them is just part of the benefit of working there.

Answer 7

Try to put yourself in the other person's shoes. Imagine yourself in their circumstances, and think about how you would feel.

Then, pray, and ask God to give you this charism; the gift to be empathetic.

Answer 8

I am very fortunate indeed. I am one of those who can sense the feelings of others. I guess they call that being empathic.

Answer 9

I wish it came natural. I go to a church were we have a dream center to help people and we do outreaches and random acts of kindness in our community. Is that what you're looking for?

Answer 10

Being lovable.