My boyfriend doesn't trust me. I have lied to him in the past, and he has forgiven me, but he is always paranoid. He hates all of my friends. He doesn't want me to go out with them. I don't lie to him anymore, but he still does not trust me. I don't think that it will work out, but I don't want to let him go because I love him too much. What should I do? (We have been off and on for the past 4 years, and I live with him.)
2007-03-11 12:49:21 · 14 answers · asked by WTF 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I never cheated on him, although I did sleep with someone while we were broken up.
2007-03-11 12:55:01 · update #1
If you've betrayed his trust, it usually takes a LONG time for him to actually trust again, if ever... maybe you should just move on, you don't sound happy, he doesn't sound happy... what's the point?
2007-03-11 12:53:07 · answer #1 · answered by F.J. 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'd just explain to him why you lied before and how you won't do it again, and tell him that you can only take so much of him not trusting you until you will have to leave. Maybe if it comes down to being with you or not, he will gain some more trust.
2007-03-11 12:53:28 · answer #2 · answered by crys1403 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You ruined this relationship yourself, in that first lie you told, and like it or not, he's never going to be able to fully trust you again. (once a liar always a liar)
Anywho, the best thing you can do, is break it off with him permanently, and the next relationship you get into, DON'T LIE... It'll help things so much more in the long run.
2007-03-11 12:52:46 · answer #3 · answered by kenniemcooper 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well there's your problem, you lied to him. And I thought love is when two people tell and remain true to each other. Probally lied too much that you broken and shattered his trust and he ain't going to get his heart broken again. The best thing and true thing to do is ask for forgiveness. God wants us to forgive one another. Tell him "I'm sorry for lieing to you in the past, I've had changed and please forgive me". It can make him to forgive you and get back together. If not, move on and leave him.
2007-03-11 12:58:13 · answer #4 · answered by Robby M 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I was actually in this position a few years back, except I was in your boyfriend's position. I think all you can do is deal with his paranoia for a while. Reassure him all the time how much you and just be understanding for a while. Either he will eventually loosen up, or he won't. If he does, great, but if not, you might have to leave him and start over.
2007-03-11 12:54:12 · answer #5 · answered by ZoeJayne 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is going to be a forever deal here. Once a person looses trust, they never get it back. I know I don't.
2007-03-11 12:53:57 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
i was the same kinda position. atleast i hope so. it soooooo hard. that **** is bad i felt exactly the same way but you can't give up. i tink he loves you alot too and wants you all too himself. but if it doesn't make you happy tel him. that's his job to make you happy. he should better trust you soon before he loses something and start regretting. relationships are built on trust and if you don't have atleast 1% you have nothing.
2007-03-11 12:59:44 · answer #7 · answered by ? 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i have been with my bf for 5 mnths...and that's exactly how he acted before i took control of the relationship...if somebody dosn't trust you...why give them your trust...he's always gonna be thinkin your doin something behind his back...and if you stay with him...it's only gonna get worse...an abusive relationship always starts of with jealousy...you need to take control as soon as possible of your relationship...if not he's never gonna change...i took dating classes...and that's exactly wutt they told me to do...tell him if he dosn't change that your gonna leave him...and if he does change it means he really loves you...and he would do anything to keep you by his side...but if he dosn't...than gurl...yyou need to move on...because their will be somebody out there who will give you the respect you want...and the trust you need...
2007-03-11 13:00:37 · answer #8 · answered by sw33t ch33kz 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If your partner is trying to tell you with whom you can see, it's a gigantic red flag. Don't allow anyone to tell you who you can or cannot hang out with. This is a sign of a controlling person. This is just my opinion. :)
2007-03-11 12:52:14 · answer #9 · answered by VHagerty 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
....ouch....
he ha a good reason 2 be paranoid. how can he be sure u won't cheat again? he's watching over you to prevent you form ever being in that situation ever again. HOPE!
2007-03-11 12:53:27 · answer #10 · answered by oldravensfan 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋