2007-03-11 10:55:06 · 25 answers · asked by missycpblonde 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
It depends. Are you in a relationship? I've seen many weddings where, due to size & money, they didn't have people bring guest unless they were in a serious relationship. Not that I agree with this, it's always irked me in the past, but there may be a reason they didn't think to allow you a guest. Ask your brother or his fiance about this, I'm sure there is a reason.
2007-03-11 11:15:30 · answer #1 · answered by layla983 5 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Don't know where you are. I am in Scotland and the idea of puting a name and ' plus 1' on an invitation here would be considered really ignorant. However I am only saying this as it shows wherever you are in the world it can all be different.If you were inviting someone and allowing them to bring another here normally it would be the name of the person & Guest or persons name & Partner. Just thought I would add what probably is rather useless info!!!
Now with regard to your brother's wedding if you are over 16 I certainly think it most unusual you are not being asked to bring someone along. If you have a good relationship with your brother why haven't you asked him? Could it be a very small family meal and unless family members had a definite spouse/partner they were just inviting other family members on their own? If this was the reason the couple should have told all the members of both families that were in this position. You naturally will be offended if you have not had an explanation and it will just niggle at you until you ask. Perhaps your mum knows why?
If you as I said are an adult sister seems most odd. I have a daughter being married this summer and this subject has been under discussion. In our case not sisters/brothers but cousins and friends who are not in a relationship, in the end we decided we would ask them with a guest but we have counted 20 who haven't boyfriend/girlfriend. The total cost per head is about £55, plus transport to the venue. This means you are actually paying for people to accompany them you don't even know but suppose it is expected. The situation is difficult as at my last daughter's wedding at the end of the day some of the people didn't bring friends despite saying they were coming and as our final numbers were in to the hotel they had to be paid for. Afraid young people either don't think or don't know about these things. I am just pointing out some reasoning behind your brothers thinking, especially if they are paying the wedding themselves. It is still no excuse for not giving you a reason, unless you are well under about 16 then at a family wedding what he has done seems fine.
2007-03-11 12:23:27 · answer #2 · answered by Ms Mat Urity 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Nope. Be glad you got invited and go have a good time at your brother's wedding. It is his day, not yours.
I have taken the time to look up what Miss Manners has to say about "plus 1" on invitaions.
"But the innovations that are most widely followed, even by those who resent them, are vulgar, impractical or nonsensical — and almost always expensive. Here are some that Miss Manners refuses to sanction:
That hosts must allow anyone who is single to bring along that ubiquitous person known as "And Guest." And Guest doesn't know the hosts or care about the wedding, and if left at home, would allow the person who was invited to meet someone better disposed toward the occasion."
2007-03-11 12:39:27 · answer #3 · answered by Poppet 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
If I was in a serious relationship then I would have a problem with that. But if not then no, it may be because the size of the venue limits the amount of people that can be invited so by not inviting plus 1's, especially as it may be people they don't know, they will be able to invite all their freinds and relations. Maybe speak to your parents to see if they know the reason before speaking to your brother.
2007-03-13 04:40:42 · answer #4 · answered by LSB 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Unless you are married or in a long-term relationship, you have no right to expect to be allowed a plus 1.
I am getting married next Spring and there is no way I am paying for people to bring strangers to my wedding to eat my food and get drunk!
It is not as if you won't know anyone at the wedding as it will be full of your family. It may just be that your brother wants to keep the wedding as an intimate family affair.
At the end of the day it is his choice as to what happens at his wedding, not yours.
2007-03-13 04:54:10 · answer #5 · answered by PNewmarket 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If you're single, then you shouldn't be offended. It's very expensive to feed alot of people a 3 course meal, so why should he invite people he's never met or doesn't know very well? It's not as though you're not going to know anyone there and I'm sure he'll take into consideration that you're alone when he's doing the seating plan. Just enjoy the day.
2007-03-12 04:40:54 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
What do you mean?
1 - do you mean that you have an invitation that does not have "Miss Missy +1"?
2 - or do you mean that you never received an invitation?
If its #1, then you should not be offended. he is just saying you can't bring a guest.
If its #2, and you ARE close, then yeah I would ask him what is up. If its #2 and you aren't close, then I would not be offended.
Clarification needed.
2007-03-11 13:01:02 · answer #7 · answered by Terri 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Just ask him about it - calmly - but remember at the end of the day, this is your brother's wedding, he can invite who he wants/doesn't want. Maybe there is little seating/they dont want it to be too expensive etc. Try and be understanding and dont take offense, I'm sure he wouldnt have meant it in that way
2007-03-11 12:13:18 · answer #8 · answered by keeley 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Weddings are a pain in the neck when people get offended. Remember this is your brothers day and what he wants is paramount. He will not be doing this to hurt you.Please smile and show joy at your brothers happiness. This will make your brother happy and lessen the stress he will be under.
2007-03-11 11:07:00 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 5⤊ 0⤋
I wouldnt be, I wasnt even invited to my brothers wedding. This means that you can invite anyone you like. Are you single? Cause maybe they dont want you to feel you should go by yourself?
2007-03-11 11:11:25 · answer #10 · answered by Janie B 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋