Is it a sin to not tell your family or friends you were raped?

Question

When you think you brought it upon yourself so you're too embarrased to tell anyone.Does God not let us in heaven for that?

Answer 1

Sin is an outdated concept. What you wish to tell or not tell others of your personal life is your business. There is no God. Heaven doesn't exist.

What you have is your friends here. You also have professionals who have experience with rape and who might be able to help you get through any issues you might have.

Your have your own brain. You know your situation better than anybody here. You can choose who around you that you wish to share your woes with and who it would not be a good idea to let know.

Answer 2

No, it's not a sin. Do what you feel comfortable doing...but being raped is not the victim's fault. So if the victim chooses to tell or not, the victim isn't to blame either way.

You don't choose to be raped. You don't bring it on yourself. EVER. The rapist should be shamed and brought to justice, and the only way to do that is to tell. It might even help the rapist from raping again.

Edit: I mean tell the authorities. Who cares about your friends and family. They're not the ones in charge of bringing a rapist to justice, unless they're law enforcement, and if they are, then they should be fair and considerate like you were any other victim. Don't be embarrassed to tell the cops and hospital people, for sure. Crime will never be stopped if good people don't stand up for themselves--you really would be doing a public service by telling the authorities.

But anybody else--keep it private or make it public. Your call.

But if it's just too overwhelming to tell, it's not a sin to keep it to yourself. Do try to find the strength to tell on a rapist, but if that's not possible, it's no sin.

Answer 3

Since you are already a parent of two children, and now a single mom, you know what is right and what is wrong. You know if you participated willingly or not. If you were forced, it is rape, but if you put yourself is a place where this could happen, you made some mistakes. The Bible calls it fornication or adultery. You do not need to confess anything to anybody unless they had a part in it or it caused them some hurt somehow. God hates sin, but he loves the sinner. He just want you to confess to Him what you did wrong, and in sincerity, plan not to do it again. You are not truly repentant if you repeat the behavior that brought on this situation. You are lonely no doubt, but do not use that loneliness as an excuse to do something that you know is wrong. Think of your children. What kind of an example are you setting for them to follow. God loves you. The question here is, "do you love Him?" Love is a motivator. When you love someone, you do not want to do anything to hurt them or offend them . If you want to be sure you are ready for heaven, ask Him to forgive you, go to church, read your Bible, and live like you love Him with all your heart. God will bring you a good and godly husband who will treat you like a woman deserves to be treated....with respect.!

Answer 4

I did not tell my parents when I was raped. The rapist also impregnated me, and I hid that fact as long as I could. When it became obvious, my family scorned me, blamed me, and disowned me. My mother ridiculed me for not telling her earlier, so "we could take care of the problem" before anyone found out. I had the child, and loved the child.

In my case, it would have been a sin to tell them.

Your case may be different, but you know your family better than anyone else. Trust yourself first. Especially now. Almost all women feel guilt after being raped. This is because we are so ashamed of having been violated that we think we must have done something to cause it. Our mind is trying to come up with any possible reason why someone would do that to another person. I know exactly how you feel, but I can tell you this: Nothing you did or didn't do would have changed what happened. It was HIS design, not yours, and he would have found a way to accomplish it no matter what you did. Women don't ask to be raped, and most men wouldn't rape a woman, no matter what she did. You were raped because he is a rapist, and that's what they do. There are many people you can talk to about this, confidentially. You can even talk to a planned parenthood counselor, and they cannot tell anyone. It is your decision to call the police, but I recommend you to get examined by a physician, in case you have suffered injury or disease by this monster.

Answer 5

Nobody brings rape upon themselves. Not telling your family that you were raped is not a sin either. You should tell them though. Not reporting what happened to you, no matter how embarrassing that may be, will let the person[s] off the hook.

What's to say that they won't rape someone else, and that someone won't report them either? It could be an endless cycle.

It's better to tell. God, I believe, will let you go into heaven. It's not you're fault that you were raped. No matter if you were dressed "to provoke" or wanted it at first, and then decided that you didn't. No is no, and if you don't want to have sexual intercourse, the person should respect that. It's never your fault though, not matter how many people think otherwise.

Tell your parents though, and the cops. Whoever rapes someone should be behind bars, not walking the streets.

Answer 6

Some things are better left unsaid, and that does not make it a sin. If you think you brought on a rape by dressing or acting promiscuous, you may have brought on something to provoke it, but you did not cause it, the person that raped you did. That person, even though you think you had a sign on that says " rape me" is the one that had no control and should be blamed. You could have been dressed like Granny Clampet, a rapist does not care. It is a sexual sickness. Do not feel quilt or blame yourself.
I do, however, suggest you talk to a therapist if you are having a hard time dealing with it. You obviously are because you are asking strangers for help.
I am not overly religious , but I don't think that being raped will make you evil in God's eyes. We all have done something wrong in our lives, if God did not forgive, there would be NO ONE in heaven.

Answer 7

It isn't a sin not to tell your family and friends. Unfortunately some families are not safe and supportive enough to be trusted with that sort of information. If your family is not safe, it's probably wise to withhold.

If your family is supportive and you just don't want to tell them because you are embarrassed, I would ask that you reconsider. Rape can have long-lasting physical and emotional consequences. People who love you, will love you even when you do something that you think is wrong. They could be a source of strength and support to you.

I would also ask you to reconsider blaming yourself for what happened. It is very common for rape victims to blame themselves. Even if you went out with someone you knew wasn't a nice guy, or agreed to be alone with him, that doesn't mean that it was your fault. Even if he misunderstood your intentions, that doesn't mean you asked for it.

Please call 1-800-656-HOPE (4673), or go to the rape crisis web site to find a center in your area: http://www.ibiblio.org/rcip/.

You need to get a physical check-up, and I urge you to see a counselor. The only thing worse than being raped is living with the guilt and grief and letting it cripple your life. Please let someone comfort and help you.

Answer 8

First I want to tell you that I am a male and could never know the anguish a woman who has been raped would have to go through.

A rape victim should not feel shame or embarrassment.

The following discussion will consider your question from a purely doctrinal point of view.

Sin is a deliberate thought, word, deed, or omission contrary to the eternal law of God.

In other words, sin is anything that hurts your relationship with God.

Sin is a personal act. Moreover, we have a responsibility for the sins committed by others when we cooperate in them:
- by participating directly and voluntarily in them;
- by ordering, advising, praising, or approving them;
- by not disclosing or not hindering them when we have an obligation to do so;
- by protecting evil-doers.

Not reporting that you were raped would help protect the rapist and possibly put other women in danger.

I would think that reporting a rape and receiving the love and care you deserve would help heal your physical, emotionally, and spiritual wounds and strengthen your relationship with God.

With love in Christ.

Answer 9

This is a matter of deep respect to yourself and therefore you are obligated to report to the police and your lawyer. You have been violated and who knows to what extent of damage what the trauma has affected your personal, emotional, moral and spiritual values that is detrimental to your life and relationship to people around you. Rape is a very serious and violent crime and it must be dealt with to prevent the perpetrator from having more victims. Rape is rape regardless of what you did or you think you did that you are too embarrassed anyone will know. To not do anything about it is like encouraging the rapist to victimise more. Seek counsel from your relatives or trusted friends and the police and your lawyer without further delay.

You are the victim here, and I believe the God of Mercy will not punish you for this. It is the rapist that has a problem and you have a moral obligation to your fellowman or the public to warn or protect them from this criminal. It is your personal choice to forgive your rapist but can your conscience allow you to have peace of mind knowing it could happen again to you or to others for not addressing this problem?

Answer 10

It isn't a sin, unless you don't give it to God.

Also, one should tell a doctor right away, to get DNA of the rapist and check for venerial diseases.

One isn't guilty for being raped, one is a victim. Whoever you tell should honor you enouph to respect your privacy in it. That is why it is sooo important to give the whole thing to God, as soon as you think that you should. God will give you wisdom of what to do, & let you know who you can trust.

Also, if you are under 16 or 18, it is considered automatically rape in a court of law. At least in America.

The only thing that will keep you out of heaven is not believing in Jesus Christ your Lord & Savior, & His redeeming blood covers your sins and He raised from the dead.

Answer 11

It is not a sin and you should tell at least your family, you did not bring it upon yourself, NO one brings it upon their own self. Someone has committed a crime against you and should pay for the crime. It is not your fault. God will not hold this against you. You should tell and report it and have the rapist prosecuted before they do it to some one else, if you don't tell and they do it to someone else then that might be a sin, you should tell and do it right away.