9 year old help?

Question

Well a few weeks ago her son (9 years old) started hiding to play his gameboy adv., & he would turn on his radio so that no one would hear the game going. She had specifically told him no games that day, the week that Her hubby was gone she had asked him to get a couple of things done before bed, she goes in his room & he is hiding & playing the gameboy, so she started taking things out of his room toys, books, games, & she started to find snacks and candy and medicine that he was getting in the night while everyone else was asleep. Well he was on major grounding and required to sit on his bed at all times if he wasn’t doing chores or homework, & he decided to get up and steel some of his sis (7 year old) candy bars and eat them. Last night we heard talking at the dinner table and asked who it was and the brother & sis both said it was the other, Sis eventually fessed up. But he held firm it wasn’t him, but from what he was saying happened he would have had to be talking,

and he finally said it was him but she doesn’t know what to do with him.

she asked for my advice. I don't Know what to say.

This is the first time he has lied. for as long as I have known this family. My parents kicked me out at 15. They took me in. I am now 22. And we talk about it all. i just want to Help.

Answer 1

Who are these people and why do you care ?
If a parent doesn't want a child to play computer games, remove them from the house.
Why do these kids have candy in their rooms ? Just take it away.

Answer 2

If the game boy is the problem, instead of taking toys, books and games, she should take the gameboy and put it where he can't get it. She could set the kitchen timer for the amount of time he is allowed to use it per day (when not grounded from it) and then should only give it to him for that specific period of time before locking it back up. Apparently she needs to lock up the medicine right away because that is just plain dangerous. 9 year olds should not be self-medicating!!

As for the candy bars, how many candy bars do they keep laying around the house? Too much candy is very unhealthy. I have some healthy snacks that my son has unlimited access to and other snacks that he can have only with permission (kept in a different place). I agree that lying is a problem, but most kids do it now and then. He should have a consequence for lying.

ADDED: I am a little concerned that she has him limited to just sitting on the bed doing nothing for an extended period of time. I think it is unrealistic to expect him to do that. Time out should be about 2 x the kids age or 18 minutes in this case. What did he do to be put in this kind of time out (the candy bar thing?) Perhaps his punishment should be to buy his sister new candy bars (or something equal to that amount of money) and apologize for lying. If I was going to remove toys, I would do it one toy at a time and give it back if his bad behavior didn't reoccur in a certain period of time (2 days or a week). If you take everything at once, you lose your leverage for future bad behavior. I hesitate to restrict reading, but being made to write out an apology of 50 words or so would be reasonable for lying.

Answer 3

I think she needs to go ahead and take him in for a psychological evaluation or ask her pediatrician if he recommends one. It's not "average" behavior for that age and most likely will keep getting worse.

Answer 4

never let him out of her sight literally

Answer 5

sorry but I don't even understand what your question is.
What do you want help with?