I don't understand what she wants, help me?

Question

We just had our first lil one 2 months ago and she had one already this was our first valentines(long story) and we didnt even go anywhere and her birthday is this week and she wants to go out with her friends, im not mad but its like we haven't been alone for even an hour since she got pregnant, is she playin with me to just keep me around or what? I don't understand we live together now i moved outta my apartment to move with her (longer story) and we sleep in the same bed but i feel like she doesnt even have interest in me anymore anytime we get a chance to have free time for ourselves and i ask if wants to have lunch, dinner or anything theres always an excuse i;m almost ready to give up trying to put the spark back in our relationship, we don't have sex and barely kiss anymore should i try to still make this work? (im goona take care of my son regardless)we are supposed to get married! please no answers about birth control or condoms too late for that i already know

Answer 1

yea keep doing your part in the relationship

Answer 2

Hi!

It sounds like you're having a rough time -- sorry to hear.

Just so you know, sometimes after a woman has a baby, she might lose interest in sex for a while. It's a biological thing, and is very common.

I'd like to say it might be a good idea if you can ask you to take some time to talk with you.

Tell her how you feel -- "i feel alone"... if that is what you feel. and let her know you understand she just had the baby, and she may not be "ready" for sex yet, but you still care and want to spend quality time with her.

If you are worried about your relationship TELL HER by all means! Tell her you want to know how she feels.

You can't just sit around and exist and wait for her forever.

Even if it's difficult for you, please talk with her as soon as possible, so this doesn't go on.

You deserve a good life, too....

all the best.

Answer 3

ALl I can say is you can take care of the baby by not been with her, too. If she is treating you this way and you'll ain't married yet just wait till you do gt married and she has the kid. You will might as well lose all your free time because she will throw it in your face about having your baby and not even helping her to take care of it. Even though your the one taking care of the baby and not here. SO I first would make sure the baby was your's after it's born so you can take care of it but her you need not feed teh kitty anymore. Because after teh baby comes she's going out with you or without you. SO think ahead and make the right decision.

Answer 4

it is hard being a new parent...as for not sleeping together, with a newborn, who gets sleep? Hang in there, and before you do get married, why not go see a counselor and make sure it is the right choice for the two of you. A little time and money consulting a therapist could set you on a whole new track. For the baby's sake, usually a good thing when the parents get married, because they want to be for the right reasons. Hope that helps!

Answer 5

Wow. I am having such a similar problem its kinda scarey actually, in bed i wont do anything with my boyfriend i hardley ever kiss him to. but the thing is, he messed up, he watched porn when i was 8 months pregnant and it was a bunch of skinny girls and i was like huge, and cried so bad that day. now whenever i go to kiss him or anything i get nausious, because i feel like im not really what he wants, and i cant control that feeling but im not ready to end the relationship yet. so maybe ur gf feels that toward you but for a different reason, women are tricky. the answer is almost defenitly that she is NOT cheating. but if you dont fix this fast, she just might.

Answer 6

i can tell you are fairly young. i can tell you from experience that this is common for a woman after having a baby and unless you can both really, and i mean really talk about it or agree that you truly love each other and agree to see a counselor to iron it out and have a great marriage you are doomed to failure. don't get married just because of the baby, you will end up resenting your choice and each other and the child will sense this as it grows older. if you decide to break up make sure you are an integral part of the childs life, this means be involved even if she marries someone else later. the other man will have to understand, from you, that you don't hold any grudges towards him but he needs to agree that that is your child and you ARE going to be around, coaching, going to school functions, anything that involves making sure that that child has a loving family and has a great chance for success in life otherwise that kid will be ( pardon the language) one ****** up mess! take a good look at the kids of single or re-married parents today, you will see two kinds, messed up ones from parents that are'nt involved and level headed ones from parents that are. hope this helps.

Answer 7

Shes probably stressed. Surprise her. Dont try to get her permission. Make it a spur of the moment thing. If she goes to work or out to the store, when she gets home, have a sitter ready and take her out. Or even have the sitter take the baby and stay in. Decorate the house, make it romantic. Its more fun to not know whats going to happen next. If you ask her, shes expecting it. Make sum unexpected changes. Dont give up on her! If she didn't want you, she wouldn't be there!

Answer 8

keep trying, since her birthday is this week, let her go out with her friends for a bit, than get a sitter (maybe his grandparents) and make a romanic dinner for two for when she gets back and just put the spark in there and if you can try and talk to her about how you feel hope it helps

Answer 9

Surprise her with something...like a romantic candle lit dinner...something she cant walk away from or make excuses. She just probably feels like shes been through a lot of stuff recently and she needs you to be there for her.

Answer 10

look man im only 11 and im already acting mature. all u have to do is calm down and relax. take her to de spa relax wit her . explain how u feel and why, thwn ask why is she acting like this, "is it me"? try asking that like i said im only 11 so it might not work. jus try it thats what i did wit my girlfriend but most importantly JUS CALM DOWN. if you u need any more hlp email me at [e-mail] trust me jus try it :-)