OK...this is what is happening. I have a friend that keeps going back to this guy that abuses her. Like last time he got drunk, he hit her and she said it was her fault when we asked about it. Can this be what she wants? I just need to know. Why do girls like to be abused?
2007-03-11 09:29:09 · 18 answers · asked by Lex 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
there aren't any short answers to that. for some that's all they've known, and typically they're typecast and those are either the only guys that aggressively go for them or the only ones they'll really respond to. it's a rare case, a cold day in *& when you can honestly say that there weren't any good guys that went after them, and I'm not just saying that because i was interested in a few of them myself just my observation.
it's a rather complex dynamic, very difficult for anyone on the outside looking in to understand. best you can do is just continue to be the friend that you've known how to be. she may get out of the abusive relationship, and she may not. the relationship may not be as abusive as you think it is, and may just appear to be so because you're her friend, or maybe you're interested yourself or whatever, it doesn't matter. no it probably isn't what she wants, on the surface, but it's what she's digressed to, so she may think that she deserves it. it could be any number of things, just hang in there ...
2007-03-11 09:35:42 · answer #1 · answered by collard greens with hash browns 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
ok here is what i think about women who stay in a abusive relationship. One, they are afraid to leave, because he may come after here, thats what alot of people will say, i think thats crap. You have the choice, yes he may go after you if you leave, but if he is willing to do something drastric, what makes you think he would not have done it if you stayed, the choice to go and attempt to have a life free of fear, or just stay and take the beatings for the rest of your life...come on. The other reason is alot of women are stupid when it comes to men, he will hit her them say im sorry i love you, she will want someone to love her so bad that she will forgive hin tine and time again. And most of the time you cant help stupid women like this, they wont listen because she has a man that loves her so much he beats her *** every night. I was in a relationship for 10 months to a man that was quite big, a boxer who attended tough man events, he never hit me put he did push me on the sofa and hold me down, thats all it took, i sent him packing he tried for over 2 months to get me to take him back i said fu** you, and went on with my life. It will start will small things and continue to hitting, once you see that first sigh you need to leave, none of that " oh he will change, i walked into the punch", no tell her to stop being a stupid a** women and get the hell out.
2007-03-11 09:40:46 · answer #2 · answered by jessica d 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think for some that is all they know it is a way of getting attention they keep going back because they think no one else wants them it's sad but there's nothing you can do they have to be the one to leave sadly for most they go on like this for years or until they die at the very hands of the one they think they love if only we could make them see before it's too late
2007-03-11 09:40:38 · answer #3 · answered by MARY ann 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No girl likes to be hurt in any way. Your friend needs help if she keeps going back to him. Maybe she's just scared of being alone. You should really talk to her because that in not a relationship you want her to get tied down to. You really have to be there for your friend because there must be more going on, cuz like i said, no girl likes to be hurt. Good Luck with your friend and God Bless.
2007-03-11 09:34:35 · answer #4 · answered by missi 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Its not because she likes it, but because he makes her feel GUILTY. So she keeps going back trying to "get it right" the next time, thinking that if SHE changes, he wont hit her.
Shes trying to prove to herself, that she is loveable.
Really, HE is the one with the problem that needs changing, not her.
NO woman EVER goes back because "they like it". They only go back because they do not understand the psychological TRAPS involved in abusive relationships, that they so esaily fall into.
2007-03-11 09:35:54 · answer #5 · answered by Yentl 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No silly, she doesn't like to be abused!
She's in love with him!
You really odd to try talking her out of being with him.
Abuse can turn even worse! She is in danger, not to be mellow dramatic but seriously. You need to convince her that she can find better then him & then him hitting her is not right. Find your own words, & tell her. Before it's to late...
2007-03-11 09:37:16 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
NO WE DON'T. The only reason that she puts up with that is because she doesn't love herself; more than likely she has a low self esteem and will do anything to say that she has a guy. I know other people who are like that... its really sad :-\
2007-03-11 09:37:01 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Dude pull your head out of your a$$ and get her some help. No women likes to be abused. Get her some help.
2007-03-11 09:34:29 · answer #8 · answered by flaming_pony79 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
most girls don't want to be abused. This girl is probably just messed up and convinced that he loves her, despite what he does to her. You need to help her.
2007-03-11 09:35:50 · answer #9 · answered by Amber _rose 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
A gal I worked with did the same thing for years. He had her convinced that she wasn't worth better. It takes a very Strong person to get out.
2007-03-11 09:39:47 · answer #10 · answered by Pandora 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋