how should i punish her?

Question

my 5 yr old keeps on swearing spitting and hitting her sister she is always yelling and being sassy do i smack or not

is no then what else can i do?

we spend alot of quality time together and i do try to time her out when she does little things but it never works her sister is always good at home its only at school she has a problem and we try not to shout were possible but i think the swearing is being picked up from school or somthing but when i spoke to her teacher she said she hadn't heard any one other then maddie swearing and that 4 other parents had complained that there children ha used the word sh*t or called there mum a bit*h and when asked were it came from they said maddie says it or maddie told them to say it so you can see why this is a hudge problem for me! But if her sister 14 swears i cant spank her or can i what do u think?

Answer 1

What would of your mom done if you were the 5yr old?

If you agree with her method, do the same, if not do the opposite.

Stay calm... and walk away till you can handle the situation...

Answer 2

your 5 year old daughter sounds a bit like my 3 an half year old son lol although he doesn't spit or smack he just has a foul mouth alot of my sons problem is my older nephews and neices they all teenagers my son thinks he one of them, i don't use the language he come out with, smacking won't work your saying that she smacks her sister so that is just gonna tell her that smacking is ok when its not. try removing toys pocket money have a naughty chair and put her there for five minutes till she realizes why she has been put there, when my son started with bad language i was always telling him no that is naughty but then he started doing it to get a reaction, my problem solved its self really i started to ignore him and walking out of the room he was in, sometimes even now if he uses bad words he knows my look and always comes up and says im sorry mum

Answer 3

The other kids in the class now have a scapegoat!! My daughter has that problem...she gets blamed because of her past behaviors. I had to change my answer after I read your added details. But...my answer stays the same for a resolution to your problem.
The spitting? my biggest pet peeve as a preschool teacher. Worst thing a child can do. I had a tot who kept doing it and I suggested to parent that soap (good old ivory) was the best solution. I used it on my daughter when she continually bit, spit, or sassed back... now that she is 7, she doesn't even remember it!! So I guess it left no scars! and it worked at the time. Just make them hold it in their teeth until they settle down. Then help them rinse and spit in sink. You'll be surprised how well it works for such things. It stops repeated offenses.

YOU have to be the adult to make your children mind, and administer the soap. Even if it calls for going to the school and doing it.
Someone must have a problem with the soap, which I guess someone has...since I have a thumbs down. Don't knock it till you've tried it on a very unruly child. Better than spanking, and the child makes the decision to settle down, and it's not physical.
Keep up the good work, and the 14 year old is not..too..old for soap..(just remind her of that) !!

Answer 4

And why do you put up with your 14 year old swearing. Maybe you can't spank her but there is plenty of other stuff you can do. Take tv stereo, gaming, systems away. Not aload to go any where but school. Have you tried talking to your teen and explaining your 5 year old is picking up what she does. Sorry but it seems like you need to get sersious. Time out. If she gets out you put her right back. Always follow though with what you say your going to do. Let them no in no possiable way you will not put up with it. Reward charts work great for little ones. If she hits you or anyone put her in time out for a set amount of time. when its over talk to her why you put in time out and make her say she's sorry then plenty of love.

Answer 5

Forget the time out chair,forget the taking the toys, forget all of that!!! That's the problem now you have to show her who is grown and who is not!! I would be darn if any KID spits at me or either I hear them curse. You have to show her, she dont believe in time out since it aint working so u have to move up a level you were right the first time you smack her spank her hit her or anythings of that matter, because with time out YOU'RE WAISTIN YOU'RE TIME!!! You need to show her! Goodbye

Answer 6

As alot of people have suggested i would use a naughty chair/mat/step. Also remember that positive reinforcement works a treat, when u see good behaviour make a point of giving lots of attention and praise. When telling your daughter off make sure she knows what it is you are telling her off for and that she understands why it is wrong. Star charts are a very good way for a child to see the progress that they are making, if you offer some sort of reward for reaching a certain target it could help. And make sure that the target you set is reasonable, gradually up-ing it. I would seriously not suggest that you use a bed as a naughty spot, this can cause the bed to be seen as a negative place to go, which in turn could lead to some very sleepless nights!! Please also remember that it is never nessesary to smack a child, she will not respect you for it! Good luck xx

Answer 7

I have an almost 5 year old son who is going through the same phase. I usually put him on his bed for time out ...or take away toys or privleges. Also I am doing positive reinforcement. I started a chart ...for every "episode" he gets an X on the chart. If he doesn't get 3 for the day he then gets a sticker or a piece of candy. It seems to be working wonderfully! I don't think hitting/spanking would help since you are trying to teach her not to hit or phyiscally disrepect her sister.

Answer 8

Your 5 year old has learned this behaviour. Punishment is not the answer. Firstly, you must determine where your child has learned to swear, yell, spit and hit. (Now, she didn't learn it from her mom by any means?) Take a "good look" at yourself! Try to determine what you want your child to learn from you. If you don't like what you see, then maybe you will have to make some changes in your own behaviour (parenting skills). Reward your child for her good behaviour and reassure her that you love her and tell her that you don't like it when she is swearing, hitting etc. Remember, it's the behaviour that you don't like (it's not the child) and she must know that.

Answer 9

i no its hard no a days love not knowing what you can and cant do! but at the end of the day its your child and no one can tell you what is rite and what is wrong!

do what you feel is rite! there is nothing wrong with punishing your child, if you don't she will never learn rite from wrong!

if you feel it is rite to give her i little smack on the the bum that's up to you and I'm all for that also you can take things like toys away or use the naughty step or chair yes she is young but all you have to do is persevere an she will learn!

good luck love

Answer 10

have you tried the naughty corner? but if needs be as long as you dont take it too far give her a slap! it worked on me as a child and most people that i know. the whole bullying thing is for parents who constantly beat their kids, but if she is being like that she needs some good old fashioned discipline! i think thats whats wrong with society nowadays that people are afraid of their kids and what they could do, its about time that parents ruled once more and started teaching these kids a lesson or two.

Answer 11

I have a five year old that trys that once in a while. I put her in her room on her bed. She is not allowed to get up till she is told. I got back and make her apoligize for what she has done wrong. It seems to help to isolate her in there and or take her toys away. I hope this helps. You gotta get a handle on it now or you will be sorry when she is older.