There is this guy who is in most of my classes. The thing is that he makes me so nervous because I like him a little. I don't want to start anything with him, ever! He is not my type. Everytime I see him or hear his voice, I kind of "check out", I lose my focus, and the only thing I hear is my heart beating. I'm failing in those classes because of him!!! It's driving me nuts! He distracts me. How can I block him out?
Additional Details
7 minutes ago
Can someone give some real good advice? I can't tell him to change seats or his classes!!!
2 minutes ago
If I tell him then he's going to feel that he has power over me. I hate that!!
2007-03-11 05:15:36 · 10 answers · asked by Anonymous in Health ➔ Mental Health
COLLEGE KID
2007-03-11 05:30:50 · update #1
"The thing is that he makes me so nervous because I like him a little. I don't want to start anything with him, ever! He is not my type." typical, you're to proud to even it to your self! you're in denial! you already said that you like him (even for "a little!").
"Everytime I see him or hear his voice, I kind of "check out", I lose my focus, and the only thing I hear is my heart beating. I'm failing in those classes because of him!!! It's driving me nuts! He distracts me." - the fact that you are being distracted by his presence even emphasize that you do like him!
why not confront your fears and make friends with him? it is not as if you are going to marry the person right away. you are just going to get to know him. if it makes you nervous, why not get the help of a close friend to go out with the 2 of you? best friends usually do help you out in these kinds of situations.
2007-03-11 05:28:07 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Nervousness, and the control of it, is all in your head. YOU work yourself up into a tizzy about whatever it is, whether it is a love interest, a speech, or presentation, or whatever. VISUALIZE yourself being calm and collected and think cool, calming thoughts, before, during and after the situation and you will be cool. ACT AS IF has alot of truth in it. Remember all that making yourself nervous and working yourself up into a tizzy do is ruin your performance. And usually the worst case scenario DOES happen because you are nervous, preoccupied, careless and already have predicted failure or seen yourself failing. Think positive thoughts and it will increase your chances for a positive outcome. Anything else is self-sabotage.
2007-03-11 12:36:26 · answer #2 · answered by shallytally 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well obviously you like that guy. You might not be crushing on him, but maybe you want to get to know him better. And you should do that. Just head out for an ice cream, or any really casual thing. If you begin to develop any romantic feelings, oyu certainly have a crush on him. If you dont want to go out with him even just as friends, just flirt with him a little. Its very satisfiing and you wont have to spend any money^^.
2007-03-11 12:21:47 · answer #3 · answered by maxilicious 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Try looking at other guys to fade this troublesome one out... !
Look in the mirror and admire yourself... build inner confidence and go up to him and say a few normal things that are run-of -the mill stuff. Something yu would say to any other guy in class.
Now... take a deep breath and go talk NORMAL to him. Soon yu will realise... he's okay... nothing to faint about!
You definitely cannot run away.. yu have to face it... your grades are way too important than his hypnotic self.
2007-03-11 12:23:37 · answer #4 · answered by Maa Su 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Imagine him in a silly outfit every time you see him. Clown suit - big red nose - colourful afro hair ... or a ballet tutu - especially one with a big frilly skirt
learn a relaxation technique - breathing techniques (see the book "Perfect Calm") - use them in class if you find yourself checking out. Re-focus.
Talk to your campus coordinator/counselling service. They may be able to refer you to someone who can help. They may be able to negotiate a change of YOUR schedule.
Consider:
hypnosis
neurolinguistic programming
2007-03-11 12:29:47 · answer #5 · answered by Orinoco 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Take drama classes, i used to be like that but after a while of trying it i was able to be fully confident even around people you want to drop to your knees!
its such a great undervalued subject which improves your discpinary and confidence i recommend it to you!
or if you think thats long just simply try to relax around him and protend he isnt there!
its all about discplinary and focusing not whats happening around you!
2007-03-11 12:25:47 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
In private, practice over and over what you would say or do in his presence. You can pretend he is sitting there in an empty chair in front of you (or whatever) and go over in you mind what you would say and do,. Practice doing it out loud too. Then when the time comes , you can do it for real.
2007-03-11 12:20:12 · answer #7 · answered by Kerry 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
How old are you? You obviously like him more than 'a little', or you wouldn't be so distracted. However, it seems you're attracted to him purely physically.... if you're old enough, why not just ask if he'll sleep with you and get it over with? :)
2007-03-11 12:24:53 · answer #8 · answered by Aidan J 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
that happened to me too last year....
i still like him but we dont have the same classes together any more! so...im not failing classes this year!
try to get a schedule change or something...you'll get over it!!
2007-03-11 12:21:11 · answer #9 · answered by »SMiLEY« 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
don't let it get to you,young guys are just as nervous around girls
2007-03-11 12:25:40 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋